NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread – HISTORIC PHASE TWENTY!

[Asnito]

The Rome-ing charges.

#DadJokes

In honor of Bern, we have to have a Dad Jokes category.

 

[Beef Invictus]

Good morning everyone. Here is our hot sauce. It's actually hot and happens to also be a sauce. The word sweet is not included anywhere in the name of our hot sauce.

Team Hot Sauce - Marie Sharp's Green Habanero Pepper Sauce

@BernieParent could you imagine choosing a hot sauce with the word "sweet" in the name of it? Yikes.

Thank you for doing this correctly, unlike our fear-laden commissioner

 

[Beef Invictus]

"As lovers of the classics, the owners of the Tampa Bay FireSticks select as their Team Laser Gun one of pioneers of the science fiction genre: the phaser.

"Phasers were the most common and standard directed energy weapon in the arsenal of Starfleet and several other powers. Most phasers were classified as particle weapons and fire nadion particle beams; however, some were classified as plasma weapons and fired forced plasma beams. Based on the intensity and field of the beam and a variety of adjustments, a wide variety of effects could be achieved.



"As we are primarily peace-lovers, we appreciate that the phaser has multiple settings, including the ability to stun a target instead of just killing. Phasers are also effective tools, able to heat objects for basic survival or cut through rock and other substances. The beam could be focused to a single spot or widened to impact a large area.

"It must be said that the real-life use of a weapon that vaporizes its target has the strong potential to cause much more damage than what the sci-fi depiction shows.



"For maximum carnage, phasers can also be set to overload.



"@Hollywood Cannon, are you ready to boldly pick where no one has picked before?"

Phasers attack with nadions.

Lol nads

 

[Beef Invictus]

It's on the spreadsheet, Toe - on the Civilization tab, near the very bottom. Are you working on filling out your blanks?

Should I do this

 

[BiggE]

Phasers attack with nadions.

Lol nads

 

[Asnito]

For our makeup pick we are going to pick a hot sauce that is multi-functional. Not only is it good as a condiment it's also excellent as a beverage as well as a cooking ingredient.

Fifteen or so years ago we went to a Christmas party in which everyone had to bring a unique food item. After much consideration we decided to bring "Flaming Hot Chocolate Chip" cookies. To accomplish this, we needed a hot sauce that was extremely potent but didn't have a strong flavor profile. This led us to only one choice, Endorphin Rush. Needless to say, the reactions were 'entertaining'

@Beef Invictus I'm posting the recipe just for you

Ingredients​

1 cup butter, softened
1 cup white sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon baking soda
2 teaspoons hot water
½ teaspoon salt
3 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips
1 cup chopped walnuts
1 tablespoon Endorphin Rush (Flaming Hot)
2 tablespoons Endorphin Rush (Liquid Fire)
3 tablespoons Endorphin Rush (Vomit Inducing)

Directions​

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
   
   
2. Cream together the butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla. Dissolve baking soda in hot water. Add to batter along with salt. Stir in flour, chocolate chips, nuts and Endorphin Rush. Drop by large spoonfuls onto ungreased pans.
   
   
3. Bake for about 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until edges are nicely browned.

 

[mja]

Some ideas for possible categories:

Team Sorcerer
Team Martial Artist
Team Curse
Team Trucker

What do you think, @Lord Defect? Any others you'd like to suggest?

 

[Magua]

Team Retro Clothing Item
Team National Park
Team Painter
Team Refrigerator Magnet

 

[BiggE]

Team Retro Clothing Item
Team National Park
Team Painter
Team Refrigerator Magnet

Team bumper sticker
Team guilty pleasure album
Team fish
Team jester

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Should I do this

Yes, obviously. But the two of you are shit out of luck if someone picks something you want during this phase. You should try to be finished by the end of this phase so you are filled out before the next one.

Thank you for doing this correctly, unlike our fear-laden commissioner

It's ironic that I am taking so much heat for my hot sauce pick. This also seems like an opportune time to remind everyone that I will cut a bitch. Also, I'm not the commissioner.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I finished "Narco Saints." Don't watch it. Seriously, it's terrible. I'm super cereal. Killer.

We start the day with @Strawberry Fields on the clock with a pair (phrasing). Then we have @Hollywood Cannon on deck also with a pair (phrasing), because he chose to be extremely hungover yesterday and skip his pick AGAIN. This is what he's like - skip, skip, skip ...

@BernieParent is on the lido deck, and The Pervert is on the lido afterdeck.

That's enough entertainment for this morning. I have some final GDT prep to do, so keep yourselves occupied for a while.

 

[Strawberry Fields]

Alabama white sauce for team hot sauce. It's not a hot sauce per se, but it has more kick than a traditional bbq sauce and is about the most my sensitive-ass tummy can handle anymore. It's also my go to sauce at Mission BBQ. (It's the white one- should be obvious given the color's in the name) also holy shit, that picture is a lot smaller than I expected



Team laser gun- Mermaid Man's shrink belt. Is it a gun? No, but it shoots a laser and has an adverse effect on the people it hits. I say it counts.

@Hollywood Cannon

Ignore the attachments, this was the second attempt to type this damn thing out after my phone chose to refresh the damn tab after I left it for a minute.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

Sorry for the delay my peeps, duty called in the form of being a groomsman to a friend that i've known since middle school.

With that said we are prepared to make our two selections.

With our first make up pick we're going to select as our Team Sidekick...

Frank 'The Tank' Fleming





I may come to regret selecting him in this category but I envision a "position change" category sometime in the future where i'll store him in my back pocket.

Frank is a curious case because a lot of people can't stand the guy. I think he's absolutely electric but at the same time I believe that he's being taken advantage of a bit with his current stuff. That won't happen with our franchise. We will protect him and treat him as the American Hero that he is.

Frank may be an eternal pessimist but our goal here at the Las Vegas Desert Ducks headquarters is to turn him into a believer and what better way than to have him by our side as our team sidekick.

P.S. We already have a team chef so he won't need to be cooking any ribs.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

This one is probably going to be a little redundant because we already selected Death Saurer as our Official Team Attack Vehicle but we just wanted to make sure that we 100% have the weapon that while used on the Death Saurer it was also used in weaker forms on other Zoids.

So with that said we're going to select as our Team Laser Gun...

The Charged Particle Cannon from Zoids, aka Charged Particle Gun or the Charged Particle Beam Gun.

@BernieParent we're not worthy of your next selection!

 

[Lord Defect]

Alabama white sauce for team hot sauce. It's not a hot sauce per se, but it has more kick than a traditional bbq sauce and is about the most my sensitive-ass tummy can handle anymore. It's also my go to sauce at Mission BBQ. (It's the white one- should be obvious given the color's in the name) also holy shit, that picture is a lot smaller than I expected

View attachment 592180

Team laser gun- Mermaid Man's shrink belt. Is it a gun? No, but it shoots a laser and has an adverse effect on the people it hits. I say it counts.

View attachment 592179

@Hollywood Cannon

Ignore the attachments, this was the second attempt to type this damn thing out after my phone chose to refresh the damn tab after I left it for a minute.

I’ve had bbq with Alabama white sauce from a food network chef. From him not from his recipe. It was some new haunted house attraction a few years back that I won vip tickets to.
It was the worst bbq I have ever had. I don’t know if it was him, his equipment, or the sauce, but I’ll never eat that sauce again.

 

[Lord Defect]

I’m surprised we haven’t done movie producer or movie producer by decades

 

[Striiker]

It's ironic that I am taking so much heat for my hot sauce pick. This also seems like an opportune time to remind everyone that I will cut a bitch. Also, I'm not the commissioner.

Your pick was great. If I hadn’t come to an agreement with mja that’s exactly what I was going to pick.

I get “A Taste Of Thai” brand sweet red chili sauce. It’s PERFECT for when I make summer rolls, with the rice paper (which is such a pain in the ass to work with), chicken or shrimp, lettuce, carrot, cucumber, and avocado.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Your pick was great. If I hadn’t come to an agreement with mja that’s exactly what I was going to pick.

I get “A Taste Of Thai” brand sweet red chili sauce. It’s PERFECT for when I make summer rolls, with the rice paper (which is such a pain in the ass to work with), chicken or shrimp, lettuce, carrot, cucumber, and avocado.

When I first got over there and started working, I would get to the office at around Noon and get home around 8:45, and I didn't eat all day, so by the time I got home I was like literally starving to death. Those first couple of months when I didn't have any money I'd go over to my friend's boyfriend's house at night, and they had a maid, and she would cook me rice with pork and a fried egg on top. F*** my life, that was the best food I've ever had. That's what that sweet chili sauce would go amazing with more than anything else.

 

[Lord Defect]

I tracked down the food network chef, Chad Rosenthal. Worst. Bbq. Ever.

 

[BernieParent]

Sorry for the wait, all. Our Thanksgiving meal rolled into the first evening of my hockey league.

"While the owners of the Tampa Bay FireSticks aren't big fans of tattoos, we will make the best use of our selection for this category and take the Anti-Possession Tattoo from Supernatural.

"These tattoos are used by Sam and Dean and a small group of close friends to ward off demon possession. We will have these wards inscribed on our anti-evil squad, including His Holiness Pope Francis.

"Over, at loooooong last, to @Young Sandwich."

 

[pit]

The Charged Particle Cannon from Zoids, aka Charged Particle Gun or the Charged Particle Beam Gun.

This is a HANDHELD laser gun, so a laser pistol or a laser rifle would be fine, but a laser cannon would be completely f***ed.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

I have the power to have all of the powers.

 

[DancingPanther]

Sorry for the delay my peeps, duty called in the form of being a groomsman to a friend that i've known since middle school.

With that said we are prepared to make our two selections.

With our first make up pick we're going to select as our Team Sidekick...

Frank 'The Tank' Fleming





I may come to regret selecting him in this category but I envision a "position change" category sometime in the future where i'll store him in my back pocket.

Frank is a curious case because a lot of people can't stand the guy. I think he's absolutely electric but at the same time I believe that he's being taken advantage of a bit with his current stuff. That won't happen with our franchise. We will protect him and treat him as the American Hero that he is.

Frank may be an eternal pessimist but our goal here at the Las Vegas Desert Ducks headquarters is to turn him into a believer and what better way than to have him by our side as our team sidekick.

P.S. We already have a team chef so he won't need to be cooking any ribs.

Gross

Handheld for some- it just depends on the size of your hand.

You know what they say about big hands....big laser guns

 

[DancingPanther]

Sorry for the wait, all. Our Thanksgiving meal rolled into the first evening of my hockey league.

"While the owners of the Tampa Bay FireSticks aren't big fans of tattoos, we will make the best use of our selection for this category and take the Anti-Possession Tattoo from Supernatural.

"These tattoos are used by Sam and Dean and a small group of close friends to ward off demon possession. We will have these wards inscribed on our anti-evil squad, including His Holiness Pope Francis.

"Over, at loooooong last, to @Young Sandwich."

Ha! I was googling the lore behind various sigils from that show and decided on forgoing since the ones that grant power all come with a burden. And my squad is invincible, so no need for any protective warding.

In honor of Bern, we have to have a Dad Jokes category.

I couldn't pick only one, but I'm in

 

[DancingPanther]

I, once again, remind you all that automerge is the worst feature ever rolled out in the history of the internet