Salary Cap: Pens Salary and Signing thread: Dr StrangeDubas or How We Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Karlsson Watch

[cookthebooks]

i might be an optimistic fool, but i struggle to believe any outsider coming in cant identify carter and granlund as huge problems last year. granlund would seemingly get more rope, `but anybody getting hired who isnt responsible for the contract has to be clear eyed about carter being a problem that needs solving.

 

[Peat]

Turned off my phone and headed out to the lake for a long weekend and this shit is still stalled huh?

Also breakfast breads are all kinda bad. You can tell because of the sheer amount of sugar slop people have to pour on them to make them edible. Make an omelet and your choice of breakfast meats and wash it all down with an eye opener like a real adult.

Counterpoint - sometimes all you need in life is a good sponge for sugary slop.

Still, I'm not that down with starting the day with dessert. I want to like omelettes more but I can't persuade people you can make them without cheese. So my ideal breakfast over here is some sort of southwestern hash.

 

[LOGiK]

Counterpoint - sometimes all you need in life is a good sponge for sugary slop.

Still, I'm not that down with starting the day with dessert. I want to like omelettes more but I can't persuade people you can make them without cheese. So my ideal breakfast over here is some sort of southwestern hash.

Banana for me.

 

[Gurglesons]

Bagel.

 

[BlindWillyMcHurt]

Counterpoint - sometimes all you need in life is a good sponge for sugary slop.

Still, I'm not that down with starting the day with dessert. I want to like omelettes more but I can't persuade people you can make them without cheese. So my ideal breakfast over here is some sort of southwestern hash.

Yeah that's the thing... starting the day off by basically chugging 3/4 of a bottle of Mrs. Butterworths isn't ideal. But yes... there is something to be said for food as just a vehicle. A middleman if you will. Celery for peanut butter... baby carrots for ranch... breakfast breads for tree-flavored liquified sugars.

I assume you qualify "southwestern" the same way I do... i.e. dump a bunch of hot sauce on it?

Life without cheese is generally not worth living. But I've had cheese-free omelets that, once over my initial misgivings, were just fine. I had a friend make me one with pesto once instead and it was pretty terrific, for instance.

 

[SomeDude]

i might be an optimistic fool, but i struggle to believe any outsider coming in cant identify carter and granlund as huge problems last year. granlund would seemingly get more rope, `but anybody getting hired who isnt responsible for the contract has to be clear eyed about carter being a problem that needs solving.

I hate to burst your happiness bubble, but the guy making the lineup call is the same guy who watched GCRakell vs GCRust last year and kept trotting out the latter.

 

[BlindWillyMcHurt]

Bagel.

Underrated way to go IMO. With cream cheese especially.

If you wanna fancy it up just toss some salmon in the smoker and serve with capers and onion. I never get tired of lox. And it always fixes a hangover for some reason.

 

[Turin]

The ideal breakfast is three poached eggs, buttered sourdough toast and 4 strips of bacon with a dark roast coffee w/ a splash of cream.

 

[Peat]

Yeah that's the thing... starting the day off by basically chugging 3/4 of a bottle of Mrs. Butterworths isn't ideal. But yes... there is something to be said for food as just a vehicle. A middleman if you will. Celery for peanut butter... baby carrots for ranch... breakfast breads for tree-flavored liquified sugars.

I assume you qualify "southwestern" the same way I do... i.e. dump a bunch of hot sauce on it?

Life without cheese is generally not worth living. But I've had cheese-free omelets that, once over my initial misgivings, were just fine. I had a friend make me one with pesto once instead and it was pretty terrific, for instance.

By southwestern I mean use chorizo as the breakfast meat and add plenty of spice. And sure, why not on the hot sauce.

I am a heathen when it comes to cheese. I've learned to tolerate it but I leave it off whenever possible.

Also for me the best way to do pancakes (or waffles sans fried chicken) is with a good berry compote and some ice cream. We got some apple cinnamon frozen yogurt in the other day and that makes me want to do some breakfast breads.

Also Gurgs is right that bagels are always a great option. Me, I think they go great with fatty meats - corned beef, pulled pork, chorizo again, all other types of salami, sausage patties... it's mildly ironic that Judaism gave us such a wonderful vehicle for pork, but there we go.

 

[CheckingLineCenter]

“Congrats on being good at sports, here’s a cabbage.”

Man Sweden… everyone looks amazing. No way that many people can be so good looking without being happy all the time.

I really feel like most people in America are super unhappy these days. No one wants to do anything social anymore, hard to blame them- it’s stressful as f*** to manage money and live decently, people just stay inside and don’t interact. Such a shift in mental health I feel like. Idk, maybe I’m wrong

 

[SomeDude]

Man Sweden… everyone looks amazing. No way that many people can be so good looking without being happy all the time.

I really feel like most people in America are super unhappy these days. No one wants to do anything social anymore, hard to blame them- it’s stressful as f*** to manage money and live decently, people just stay inside and don’t interact. Such a shift in mental health I feel like. Idk, maybe I’m wrong

It’s all the cabbages they exchange.

 

[BlindWillyMcHurt]

Also for me the best way to do pancakes (or waffles sans fried chicken) is with a good berry compote and some ice cream. We got some apple cinnamon frozen yogurt in the other day and that makes me want to do some breakfast breads.

Yeah. Not a popular opinion but I actually find maple syrup to be pretty disgusting. I go the same route you do on the rare occasion I do morning dessert.

Also Gurgs is right that bagels are always a great option. Me, I think they go great with fatty meats - corned beef, pulled pork, chorizo again, all other types of salami, sausage patties... it's mildly ironic that Judaism gave us such a wonderful vehicle for pork, but there we go.

Bagels are definitely my "I don't have time for this shit this morning" option.

 

[3ladesof5teel]

Farm raised Bacon and Eggs, Avocado and cheese on a Bagel

Extra Bacon

Boom

 

[SEALBound]

After my first trip back, the mother and wife of one of my teammates was so happy to have us back she had a bunch of us over for breakfast after a long nights flight. She made stacks chocolate chip pancakes and I swear she put taste-related drugs in them. I can still taste them to this day. I get nostalgic about pancakes every now and then. Such a happy memory to have. I make my kids chocolate chip pancakes once a month. My boy now makes breakfast tacos with them. Loads them up with scrambled eggs, sausage, bacon, and hashbrowns. Folds it up, dunks it in syrup, and then mows it down. Doesn't even look up from the plate. Just grunts and eats. Some days I'm proud. Other days I'm scared. Other days I'm a little grossed out.

“Congrats on being good at sports, here’s a cabbage.”

I can't think of anything more Swedish than that.

My prediction: This team will suffer from the same problems (a bad bottom 6) unless 1 of Carter or Granlund are removed

If that doesn't happen, Dubas' first offseason is middling at best

I think we are in for the 2014/2015-like team where it's just the bottom 6 holding on until Sid and Geno are back on the ice. I viciously disagree with the way Sullivan and Dubas have constructed the team but I'm still hoping for the best.

 

[Deport Ogie]

I've definitely become far more of an "eggs and protein" kind of breakfast chap. Now that I'm old I've been trying to watch the ole figure and most morning carbs or syrup anything does not fit in with that ethos.

My "I don't have time for this shit" breakfast option is typically coffee and hope.

 

[CheckingLineCenter]

eggs over medium, Virginia/country ham, home fries. Bacon too if I’m feeling greedy. Maybe rye toast. Hot sauce on the potatoes and eggs.

I've definitely become far more of an "eggs and protein" kind of breakfast chap. Now that I'm old I've been trying to watch the ole figure and most morning carbs or syrup anything does not fit in with that ethos.

My "I don't have time for this shit" breakfast option is typically coffee and hope.

Plain Greek yogurt is an absolute cheat code

 

[BlindWillyMcHurt]

I think we are in for the 2014/2015-like team where it's just the bottom 6 holding on until Sid and Geno are back on the ice. I viciously disagree with the way Sullivan and Dubas have constructed the team but I'm still hoping for the best.

I think even the most optimistic sort understands that if this team doesn't land some kind of impact move that they are going to be pretty shit next season. And not in an outright awful way that gets you good picks, either. In a slow, grind-you-down, aggressively mediocre kind of way.

Sidenote: If one has to do breakfast breads... chocolate chips pancakes with a little pad of butter on top is pretty alright. I mean it's basically a giant-ass cookie but hey whatever.

I've definitely become far more of an "eggs and protein" kind of breakfast chap. Now that I'm old I've been trying to watch the ole figure and most morning carbs or syrup anything does not fit in with that ethos.

My "I don't have time for this shit" breakfast option is typically coffee and hope.

Yeah. That's my "FFS I was supposed to log on ten minutes ago" breakfast.

 

[Lust for Life]

Man Sweden… everyone looks amazing.

I can tell you from personal experience (being Swedish and ugly) that this is not true.

 

[Peat]

I can tell you from personal experience (being Swedish and ugly) that this is not true.

Congrats on being the exception that proves the rule.

 

[Andy99]

My normal breakfast is a parfait with nonfat yogurt, berries and granola. Sometimes oatmeal w berries and almonds. It’s sweet but not too sweet and that’s my preferred time of day to have sugar. I’m not a dessert eater

 

[pistolpete11]

From the Sharks perspective though, taking on Petry’s contract and retaining that much of EK’s doesn’t save them any money the next two years and that’s part of the issue…assuming Petry is willing to go to SJ, the Sharks won’t retain that much on EK.…otherwise, a third team would have to take on Petry or retain part of his contract.…it won’t be easy…Dubas tried to trade Petry leading up to the draft and there were no takers…would take a significant asset to do so…this is the main reason I think a EK deal is dead..

But it would save them $7M per in years 3 and 4 and they'd be getting a decent NHL-ready prospect in Smith, 1st, and 2nd (and Poulin).

If they think they are going to be able to unload Karlsson (who has a full NTC) without retaining and taking back salary and still getting something of value, good luck to them.

If a 3rd team needs to get involved to either retain salary or meet Petry's M-NTC, then I agree. It's probably dead.

 

[Empoleon8771]

I don't think it's a "money issue" that would cause problems in a potential Karlsson trade as much as it would be that San Jose isn't getting compensated enough for the amount of retention they'd have to do.

It's why I think that if Karlsson doesn't get traded this off-season, he's not going to get traded for multiple years. Karlsson doesn't have enough value on his own to make up for the extreme retention that would be required for another team to trade for him. Retaining $4 million over 4 years ends up being $14 million in real dollars with how much money Karlsson has left on his deal, but Karlsson doesn't have enough value on his own to make up for that cost.

If the deal is Petry, Smith, Poulin, a 1st and 2nd for Karlsson at $7.5 million, I don't think there is enough value in there for San Jose to rationalize eating that much money on Karlsson's deal. But at the same time, there is zero chance that any team pays more than that right now. The situation seems to be that San Jose is either going to make a bad deal or they'll keep him, it doesn't seem possible for San Jose to get a great return for Karlsson.

If they can find a third team to eat $2 million while San Jose eats $2 million, I think it becomes much more doable. But that's just going to result in San Jose getting back less value and needing to divert value to that third team to pay them to eat some of Karlsson's deal. At that point, it might be something like:

Penguins get Karlsson at $7.5 million
San Jose gets Petry, Smith, Poulin and a 2nd while retaining $2 million on Karlsson
Team C gets a 1st while retaining $2 million on Karlsson

 

[Andy99]

But it would save them $7M per in years 3 and 4 and they'd be getting a decent NHL-ready prospect in Smith, 1st, and 2nd (and Poulin).

If they think they are going to be able to unload Karlsson (who has a full NTC) without retaining and taking back salary and still getting something of value, good luck to them.

If a 3rd team needs to get involved to either retain salary or meet Petry's M-NTC, then I agree. It's probably dead.

Years 3 and 4 aren’t the issue and yeah, I’d think any deal betw Sharks and Pens would need a third team involved and therefore it’s dead in the water

 

[cookthebooks]

I hate to burst your happiness bubble, but the guy making the lineup call is the same guy who watched GCRakell vs GCRust last year and kept trotting out the latter.

the gm can very easily not give the coach that particular rope to hang himself with and i would argue thats a huge part of the job

 

[Buddy Bizarre]

the gm can very easily not give the coach that particular rope to hang himself with and i would argue thats a huge part of the job

Pretty sad state where the GM basically has to "idiot proof" the roster for the coach