NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread - PHASE SEVEN! Part One!

[BiggE]

The servers for this site were designed by the Flyers coaching staff. They are that inept

 

[JojoTheWhale]

With the remaining defenders either being fairly obscure oldtimers or HoVG types, we’re going off the board with our next pick to select our second legend Finn, RD Reijo “Rental Rexi” Ruotsalainen.

This diminutive but highly skilled player was one of the elite skaters in the sport, with some asserting that he could skate backwards faster than Paul Coffey could skate forwards. He had a short but productive NHL career that was notable for bouncing back and forth between the NHL & Europe as his heart desired. Glen Sather brought him over from the Swiss league late in 87 (PAIN!) for a boost and then reacquired him late in 90 for another run, leading to Ruotsalainen playing 43 playoff games but just 26 regular season games for the Oilers. Gretzky reportedly tried to get him to come back to play for LA, but Rexi decided he was done with the NHL for good.

Rental Rexi also caused an NHL rules change. He’s the reason players from other pro leagues have to pass through waivers if they come over mid-season, so that teams just can’t stash talent away to use in the playoffs. He’s also the inspiration for the next NJFZ selection. More on that in a bit.

@GKJ

I have absolutely no memory of this person. I'm reading the writeup and it feels like I should, but I swear I have never heard this name before.

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

Nor did anyone on Star Trek

“Its five year mission: to explore strange, new worlds; to seek out new life and new civilizations; to boldly go so f***ing bad because we’ve been holding it for 79 episodes!”

Some of those episodes spanned days, if not weeks, so they could obviously cut out bathroom breaks. Jack Bauer gets 24 episodes dedicated to a single day and not only does he not use the bathroom, but I can't recall him eating, either.

Star Trek spent plenty of time in the mess hall.

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

I have absolutely no memory of this person. I'm reading the writeup and it feels like I should, but I swear I have never heard this name before.

His NHL career was spent mostly with the Rangers, but, like @mja noted, he had two impactful playoffs with the Oilers. He was an incredible skater and played a modern rover-like style. Good point producer, but never was really notable on bad Rangers teams.

Part of my write up about him was going to include that, as a tremendous stats nerd as a child (and still as an adult), I would write out the boxscores from the newspaper.

His name was a particular challenge for a 5 year old.

 

[Strawberry Fields]

Ebenezer Robertson Goodfellow

Better known as defenseman Ebbie Goodfellow.

He was a forward converted to defense, and won the Hart Trophy as a defenseman in 1940, the first Red Wings player to do so. 1963 HHoF inductee.

@BernieParent

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Some of those episodes spanned days, if not weeks, so they could obviously cut out bathroom breaks. Jack Bauer gets 24 episodes dedicated to a single day and not only does he not use the bathroom, but I can't recall him eating, either.

Of course that's what you would focus on lol. My favorite thing about Kiefer is in "Designated Survivor," even when he was standing in the Oval Office not doing anything, he was still short of breath

 

[BiggE]

Ebenezer Robertson Goodfellow

Better known as defenseman Ebbie Goodfellow.

He was a forward converted to defense, and won the Hart Trophy as a defenseman in 1940, the first Red Wings player to do so. 1963 HHoF inductee.

View attachment 426630
@BernieParent

He’s a good fella
View attachment 426632

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I wish the bottom part of this draft had 1% of the urgency of the top half.

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

Of course that's what you would focus on lol. My favorite thing about Kiefer is in "Designated Survivor," even when he was standing in the Oval Office not doing anything, he was still short of breath

I told you I notice weird shit.

 

[BiggE]

Hurry up @BernieParent , Piper is really hitting the sauce

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Philadelphia Villains very pleased and proud to select another personal favorite of mine, a durable underrated defenseman who once had held the NHL Ironman title for consecutive games played, and also resting in power: Karlis Skrastins

@Strawberry Fields

Sounds like a character Patrick Rothfuss would make up, amirite @JojoTheWhale?

 

[JojoTheWhale]

Sounds like a character Patrick Rothfuss would make up, amirite @JojoTheWhale?

It's probably best you said this after I chose my category.

 

[BernieParent]

It's been 10 minutes. Sheesh.

"As our franchise athletic wear provide, the Tampa Bay FireSticks are pleased to announce a partnership with an ambitiously eco-friendly organization based in Los Angeles. Wolven's expertise is in creating sustainable athetic and loungewear from post-consumer recycled plastic, either in LA or ethical factories in China, all of which meet WCA standards of good employer practices. Furthermore, each purchase represents 1 lb of plastic waste removed from the ocean, which was a point of considerable interest from our franchise mythological deity Poseidon.

"Designing and manufacturing the FireSticks official hockey gear and other team apparel will be a steep learning curve, but we are confident in our investment."

@BiggE, please come and wow us all.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

It's been 10 minutes. Sheesh.

"As our franchise athletic wear provide, the Tampa Bay FireSticks are pleased to announce a partnership with an ambitiously eco-friendly organization based in Los Angeles. Wolven's expertise is in creating sustainable athetic and loungewear from post-consumer recycled plastic, either in LA or ethical factories in China, all of which meet WCA standards of good employer practices. Furthermore, each purchase represents 1 lb of plastic waste removed from the ocean, which was a point of considerable interest from our franchise mythological deity Poseidon.

"Designing and manufacturing the FireSticks official hockey gear and other team apparel will be a steep learning curve, but we are confident in our investment."

@BiggE, please come and wow us all.

Awesome pick. I despise plastic so much.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Honest to f***, I can't for the life of me understand how anyone on Earth takes country music seriously, even the idiots.

 

[mja]

His NHL career was spent mostly with the Rangers, but, like @mja noted, he had two impactful playoffs with the Oilers. He was an incredible skater and played a modern rover-like style. Good point producer, but never was really notable on bad Rangers teams.

Part of my write up about him was going to include that, as a tremendous stats nerd as a child (and still as an adult), I would write out the boxscores from the newspaper.

His name was a particular challenge for a 5 year old.

Part of the draw for me was the 1984-85 Topps / O-Pee-Chee Hockey set. For some reason, there was a dude at the flea market at the Roosevelt Mall who sold boxes and boxes and boxes of that particular set circa 1988 or so. I'd go every Sunday and buy up a bunch of those packs. I had tons of Ruotsalainens and Loobs and being a kid was just fascinated with their names. I still have boxes of that stuff that I haven't really looked at since the early 90's. I looked through a bit a few years ago to see I had shit like Yzerman and Chelios rookie cards. Only problem was that I had handled them like @Striiker as you might expect, so they're not worth a damn thing.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Part of the draw for me was the 1984-85 Topps / O-Pee-Chee Hockey set. For some reason, there was a dude at the flea market at the Roosevelt Mall who sold boxes and boxes and boxes of that particular set circa 1988 or so. I'd go every Sunday and buy up a bunch of those packs. I had tons of Ruotsalainens and Loobs and being a kid was just fascinated with their names. I still have boxes of that stuff that I haven't really looked at since the early 90's. I looked through a bit a few years ago to see I had shit like Yzerman and Chelios rookie cards. Only problem was that I had handled them like @Striiker as you might expect, so they're not worth a damn thing.

There were tons of Loobs flooding the market in those years, seriously.

 

[BiggE]

Well, isn’t this just sweet, McMahon Junior has, FINALLY, gotten around to calling on the Hot Rod to save his sorry ass and make the pick for the Jacksonville Methgators!

Methgators? Is that the best you could come up with Vinny? My god, even that oaf Monsoon could do better than that!

VM: DAMMIT PIPER, JUST READ THE DAMN CARD, DAMMIT!!!

Settle down Jack, don’t blow a gasket! Hell boy, don’t forget that I knew you back when you were just a crappy announcer in rat’s ass ugly blazer!! Now shut up, and let me talk a little about our choice for a future category.

I’ve had a lot of great moments in my career and I kicked a lot of asses, yeah I’m looking at you Hogan!

But my favorite moment was when I introduced my favorite fruit to that idiot Snuka’s head. Have a look!

So, our choice for future category is: OFFICIAL TEAM FRUIT!! And remember, just when they think they know the answers, I CHANGE THE QUESTION!!!

@CanadianFlyer88 , bedazzle is with your brilliance!

 

[Striiker]

Part of the draw for me was the 1984-85 Topps / O-Pee-Chee Hockey set. For some reason, there was a dude at the flea market at the Roosevelt Mall who sold boxes and boxes and boxes of that particular set circa 1988 or so. I'd go every Sunday and buy up a bunch of those packs. I had tons of Ruotsalainens and Loobs and being a kid was just fascinated with their names. I still have boxes of that stuff that I haven't really looked at since the early 90's. I looked through a bit a few years ago to see I had shit like Yzerman and Chelios rookie cards. Only problem was that I had handled them like @Striiker as you might expect, so they're not worth a damn thing.

For the record, striiker is extremely careful with his things and handling them like striiker would mean that they're in incredible condition. If anything, striiker would be considered a little bit anal about his things and general cleanliness, to the point that it makes him a pain in the ass.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

Honest to f***, I can't for the life of me understand how anyone on Earth takes country music seriously, even the idiots.

How country is country? Are we painting this as every country song ever written? Every country song written post-1980?

 

[BiggE]

How country is country? Are we painting this as every country song ever written? Every country song written post-1980?

Modern country isn’t country. It’s just vanilla pop with a twangy voice.

Johnny Cash, Merle Haggard and the like are country.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

How country is country? Are we painting this as every country song ever written? Every country song written post-1980?

All of it down to the germ of an idea that any human being ever had to sing in that way about those things and any defense of any of it is a declaration of Total War on civilization.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

Modern country isn’t country. It’s just vanilla pop with a twangy voice.

Johnny Cash, Merle Haggard and the like are country.

I agree with this. I just don't want to throw Johnny Cash or some of the other obvious names in the dumpster because that's an indefensible take.

All of it down to the germ of an idea that any human being ever had to sing in that way about those things and any defense of any of it is a declaration of Total War on civilization.

I am so happy I called BABYMETAL the modern Kid Rock now.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I agree with this. I just don't want to throw Johnny Cash or some of the other obvious names in the dumpster because that's an indefensible take.

I am so happy I called BABYMETAL the modern Kid Rock now.

Johnny Cash lol. Jojo, we live in a society.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

Johnny Cash lol. Jojo, we live in a society.

I have spent the last few weeks looking through popular Beat Saber levels and if I have to sift through one more awful, shrill weeb shit song trying to find something that doesn't make me want to die, I may explode. This is probably not the best time for us to have such a discussion.