Completely random question: by chance, is anyone going to Punta Gorda, FL anytime soon, say between now and end of April?
Long story short, I would pay you to take a turtle with you and drop it off at Iguana Land in Punta Gorda.
I've checked and it seems most airlines will allow a carry-on turtle as long as it's in a carrier (I will provide). This is useful both in this specific situation and also for later if you end up with an emotional support tortoise, which science says at least 30% of us will within the next 10 years. ETA: Turns out they are much more picky when you actually ask them specifically if a carry on turtle is acceptable, and literally none of them are willing to take on the kind of risk that an airborne turtle would inevitably lead too. I think "Snakes On A Plane" really did a number on them and now they're just like "F*** it, if it's not furry it ain't gettin' on this mother-lovin' plane!" So you'd have to drive it down there all Smokey and the Bandit style, outwitting the state troopers who are cracking down on interstate turtle trafficking.
Anyway, I have arranged for Iguana Land to take the turtle as a rescue and while I can ship it there, I'm not jazzed about FedEx a living creature. But I totally trust Blue Jackets fans for all my turtle relocation projects.
Reply back if you happen to be headed that way and are willing to be the temporary guardian of an 8 inch Yellow-Bellied Slider, or possible an Eastern River Cooter. Thanks!