Oilers hire Stan Bowman as GM & EVP of Hockey Ops

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I still think it's absurd for a GM to some how be in charge of a sexual assault investigation. That is way beyond their training or expertise. That should never happen, even today if something like this occurred, the correct chain of responsibility is the coaching staff/GM if they know something report up to the team president and make sure he is aware of the situation.

From that point on, the team president and his superiors on up to ownership in conjunction with the human resources/HR department and relevant in organization counseling division(s) should take over 100%. Not 80%, not 90%, 100%. And if the alleged victim at that point is willing to involve the police, the police should certainly be involved at that point.

The only point the GM or anyone below that should be involved in such a situation from that point on is if they have some relevant information to the case, ie: they were present at a party where something occurred later on and can provide some insight. If not, that should be the end of it from their end.

The Hawks president, McDonagh was informed and told the hockey staff (GM/asst GM/etc.) that he would handle it. McDonagh ran the Blackhawks reportedly with an iron fist and controlled just about everything too. That was actually to that point the correct way to handle the situation.

He and anyone on up from him is the one that IMO primarily failed. He said he would handle the situation and in the chain of command it's correct that he is the one that should have been handling it alongside the HR department of the Hawks. There shouldn't be ambiguity on this stuff either, it should be crystal clear how these things are handled and who does what, not "well maybe this could have been done instead".

I think approximately zero people in this thread are arguing that Bowman should've been in charge of the sexual assault investigation. That's a strawman argument.

There's plenty of options between "being in charge of the sexual assault investigation" and "putting your head in the sand and hoping it goes away."

It is amazing how the Bowman apologists have gone from "he's done his penance" to "he's done all he possibly could have." Next week he'll be a pillar of morality when it comes to handling sexual assaults.
 

Soundwave

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I think approximately zero people in this thread are arguing that Bowman should've been in charge of the sexual assault investigation. That's a strawman argument.

There's plenty of options between "being in charge of the sexual assault investigation" and "putting your head in the sand and hoping it goes away."

It is amazing how the Bowman apologists have gone from "he's done his penance" to "he's done all he possibly could have." Next week he'll be a pillar of morality when it comes to handling sexual assaults.

I'm saying in a situation where something like this occurs the correct way to handle it is to report it to the team president and HR department who should then 100% take over from there. Period. End of.

Having all this weird ambiguity of "well maybe the GM/coach/equipment manager should have taken the lead" is ridiculous in my opinion. Those people are not even remotely qualified to do any of that.

McDonagh, the president of the Blackhawks is 99% responsible here IMO, he is the team president, he said he would take over the issue and take care of it. And he should be the one to do that, if this happened today, that's how the chain of command is supposed to go.

A GM or coach should report something like this to the team president and then they should take over. Unless they have some first hand testimony or something of value to offer beyond that, that should be the end of their involvement. It should be the president and any exec positions above him, the HR department, and ownership that handle it from there on.

McDonagh failed to handle the situation that he said he would. That's on him. Hockey side people shouldn't be put in positions where they're somehow responsible for things way outside of their job description and way outside of the sphere of sports.

As for Bowman at least he has reached out and spent time with Beach and been invited by Beach personally to come visit the team he coaches now on top of working with Sheldon Kennedy's group. Anyone else in the Blackhawks org done any of that? *crickets*.
 
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FiveTacos

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I'm saying in a situation where something like this occurs the correct way to handle it is to report it to the team president and HR department who should then 100% take over from there. Period. End of.

Well if Bowman did everything 100% correctly ... then his rehab tour, volunteer work, him saying he knows he didn't do enough, and his endorsements from Kennedy/Beach are 100% performative, insincere, and utterly meaningless. Why was any of it necessary if he did everything right?

As for Bowman at least he has reached out and spent time with Beach and been invited by Beach personally to come visit the team he coaches now on top of working with Sheldon Kennedy's group. Anyone else in the Blackhawks org done any of that? *crickets*.

And it only took him 11 years and being forced out in disgrace to do it. What a wonderful guy. When's his statue being built outside the arena?
 

T REX

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Been out of the country for 10 days and come back to this and other interesting news stories..

Wow. No words(besides the ones I am typing).

Horrific PR move. Instant heels of the NHL.

JMHO...but this does not end well for the org or fans. Sad day for many.

Jackie Redmond's commentary, on this, should be epic...more to come.
 

T REX

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I have personally witnessed a person life almost destroyed by this scenario. A third party reported that another employee was sexually assaulted by another co-worker. HR immediately suspended said person and called the police, turned out the person who filed the report lied and was acting out of jealousy.

A lot of people here do not understand how these matters work in a corporation. If I were to report third hand a suspected sexual assault case to HR I would not be informed of the investigation or outcome even if I asked. Once the matter is with HR then my involvement in the matter is effectively done outside them taking my statement.
Your anecdote has no bearing on this discussion. And it is cringe. False accusations make up a very small number of REAL assaults. Cringe, cringe, cringe.

I am going to tap out here after reading through this thread. From the Jackie Redmond...

 

Johnny Rifle

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Well if Bowman did everything 100% correctly ... then his rehab tour, volunteer work, him saying he knows he didn't do enough, and his endorsements from Kennedy/Beach are 100% performative, insincere, and utterly meaningless. Why was any of it necessary if he did everything right?

Doctors second guess themselves all the time when a patient dies even though they follow the correct medical diagnosis. Hindsight is always 20/20 when it comes to these things.

Bowman may feel like he didn't do enough, but that doesn't mean he acted with malice or ignorance. Maybe instead of a guilty conscious he just has a bigger heart and took up Kyle Beach's cause because he is a genuinely good person who wants to help.

Of course, we'll never know what's in Stan Bowman's heart. It would be wrong for us to question his motivations, especially when we should question our own motivations for our own actions.
 

FiveTacos

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why are you assuming Bowman knew the extent of the abuse and just kept quiet for 11 years?

He hears an allegation, and after the Cup win the accused suddenly departs. What, he just assumed everything was a nothingburger? How big a naive idiot is he? Did he ever think in 11 years to follow up and ask anyone what happened?

And he never thought to check in on Beach at any point in 11 years? The sudden resignation to avoid an investigation should have tipped him off that a player of his very likely was assaulted. Maybe at least a "hey are you okay?"

Nothing in his actions over that decade plus indicates that Bowman gave a crap about what happened, or cared enough to find out. He only cared once he lost his gigs and needed to rehab his image.

Even if he was culpable for not taking action initially, if he'd shown genuine concern BEFORE it all came down to a lawsuit I'd be more willing to buy that he actually cares one lick about one of his players being assaulted, and just made a mistake as opposed to being someone who didn't care.

His come to Jesus moment is not unlike the sudden defending of him only after he gets hired. I don't recall a bunch of Edmonton fans defending Bowman when he first got suspended. It's not convincing when you suddenly decide after 3 years that "oh akshully it really had nothing to do with him and he's a great guy."
 

CantHaveTkachev

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He hears an allegation, and after the Cup win the accused suddenly departs. What, he just assumed everything was a nothingburger? How big a naive idiot is he? Did he ever think in 11 years to follow up and ask anyone what happened?
no, he assumed his boss, President, John McDonough, took care of it...like he said he would

And he never thought to check in on Beach at any point in 11 years? The sudden resignation to avoid an investigation should have tipped him off that a player of his very likely was assaulted. Maybe at least a "hey are you okay?"
maybe Beach wasn't ready to talk about something like that yet
we don't know

Nothing in his actions over that decade plus indicates that Bowman gave a crap about what happened, or cared enough to find out. He only cared once he lost his gigs and needed to rehab his image.
because he didn't get all the facts...it was a huge mistake on his part

Even if he was culpable for not taking action initially, if he'd shown genuine concern BEFORE it all came down to a lawsuit I'd be more willing to buy that he actually cares one lick about one of his players being assaulted, and just made a mistake as opposed to being someone who didn't care.
FFS...he didn't know he was assaulted at the time...if you read the report, the only knowledge he was aware of were "unwanted sexual advances" of Aldrich towards a player
then McDonough said he "will take care of it"

his mistake was not inquiring into it more and being on top of the situation....but when senior management says they'll deal with it, why wouldn't you believe they would deal with it?
 
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FiveTacos

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FFS...he didn't know he was assaulted at the time...

According to the report the confidant told him directly that the victim was "pretty messed up". So he knew it wasn't nothing ... He just acted as if it was.

Proof again that he did not care. And he continued not to care that the player was "messed up" until 11 years later.

his mistake was not inquiring into it more and being on top of the situation....but when senior management says they'll deal with it, why wouldn't you believe they would deal with it?

You can believe they dealt with it, and still ask what happened, how it was dealt with, and is the victim okay and what can we do for them. Those seem like pretty basic things. He didn't think it odd that this guy was still around to get a day with the Cup? Was he at all concerned that a potential predator was simply allowed to walk away quietly? Nope, he was fine to go along his merry way for 11 years.

Senior management says they'll deal with it ... Guess what, the GM is PART of that senior management. He may not oversee this stuff, but he damn well should know what's going on when it involves a coach and player. This wasn't a ticket seller harassing a concessions worker. It was a COACH and a PLAYER.

Honestly, the report is not very exonerating of anyone, it sounds more like a room full of guys in that meeting about the incident retroactively passing the buck or claiming they don't remember.

And only Bowman seems to remember being told it was handled, so is that even true or is it more covering his own ass? AFAIK no one else ever corroborated that. Yet it might have been the one thing that saved him from a much longer or even permanent ban.

He seems to have forgotten a lot of other pretty significant stuff like the 20 minute phone call, in which supposedly BOWMAN was the one giving assurances that an investigation would happen. So it's lucky for him he remembered explicitly the one sentence told to him that gave him any lifeline to come back at all, but can't remember all sorts of other conversations. Yep ... "lucky".
 

Space umpire

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You can believe they dealt with it, and still ask what happened, how it was dealt with, and is the victim okay and what can we do for them. Those seem like pretty basic things.
He cannot. … well he could ask but they HR shouldn’t tell him.
The only thing he was punished for was not (in time) reaching out directly to Beach to see it he was ok.
 

FiveTacos

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He cannot. … well he could ask but they HR shouldn’t tell him.

He can't be told that a coach resigned? He can't find out that an investigation didn't even happen? He can't ask the team Pres what happened? What the hell kind of weak ass GM was he? You make it sound like he was managing a concession stand.

The only thing he was punished for was not (in time) reaching out directly to Beach to see it he was ok.

According to the report, he was already told by the confidant that Beach was NOT okay. So he knew. And when you don't reach out until 11 years later after you've already been forced out and need to rehab your image, then truth is you really never cared. He had AGES to reach out.

If that's all it was his job(s) would have been saved. And he wouldn't have needed the PR rehab tour.
 

CantHaveTkachev

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According to the report the confidant told him directly that the victim was "pretty messed up". So he knew it wasn't nothing ... He just acted as if it was.

Proof again that he did not care. And he continued not to care that the player was "messed up" until 11 years later.



You can believe they dealt with it, and still ask what happened, how it was dealt with, and is the victim okay and what can we do for them. Those seem like pretty basic things. He didn't think it odd that this guy was still around to get a day with the Cup? Was he at all concerned that a potential predator was simply allowed to walk away quietly? Nope, he was fine to go along his merry way for 11 years.

Senior management says they'll deal with it ... Guess what, the GM is PART of that senior management. He may not oversee this stuff, but he damn well should know what's going on when it involves a coach and player. This wasn't a ticket seller harassing a concessions worker. It was a COACH and a PLAYER.

Honestly, the report is not very exonerating of anyone, it sounds more like a room full of guys in that meeting about the incident retroactively passing the buck or claiming they don't remember.

And only Bowman seems to remember being told it was handled, so is that even true or is it more covering his own ass? AFAIK no one else ever corroborated that. Yet it might have been the one thing that saved him from a much longer or even permanent ban.

He seems to have forgotten a lot of other pretty significant stuff like the 20 minute phone call, in which supposedly BOWMAN was the one giving assurances that an investigation would happen. So it's lucky for him he remembered explicitly the one sentence told to him that gave him any lifeline to come back at all, but can't remember all sorts of other conversations. Yep ... "lucky".
nah, you've already made it up your mind that this is all one big cover-up with Bowman playing a big part, despite very little evidence that this is the case (with regards to Bowman) so you've made up your mind on the matter

now you've got all the answers with the benefit of hindsight...and I know you'll grandstand with the "any decent human being would've asked more questions!"...yes, maybe in today's climate but that certainly wasn't the case 14 years ago, and it was a BRUTAL mistake not to ask more questions
doesn't make it right, but that's the reality

if the NHL has re-stated him, Beach has given his blessing, and people in the that field like Sheldon Kennedy vouch for him, that's good enough for me

he's still an average GM at best
 
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geebster

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nah, you've already made it up your mind that this is all one big cover-up with Bowman playing a big part, despite very little evidence that this is the case (with regards to Bowman) so you've made up your mind on the matter

now you've got all the answers with the benefit of hindsight...and I know you'll grandstand with the "any decent human being would've asked more questions!"...yes, maybe in today's climate but that certainly wasn't the case 14 years ago, and it was a BRUTAL mistake not to ask more questions
doesn't make it right, but that's the reality

if the NHL has re-stated him, Beach has given his blessing, and people in the that field like Sheldon Kennedy vouch for him, that's good enough for me

he's still an average GM at best
If someone under you at your job sexually abuses someone and your actions are not enough to remedy it and indeed you do nothing tangible to actually improve the situation other than punt it to HR, you are responsible. It's that simple. He didn't commit the act, he didn't condone it either, but he didn't do anywhere near enough and he is in a position of responsibility. If a teacher abuses kids and the principal and those that know don't do anything that's on them. He wasn't some innocent bystander who just heard about it he was the GM.

He was average at best so I don't see why he had to be the hire.
 

T REX

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This is just one of those times EDM fans have to suck it up and just take it.

Not much you can respond with without trying to have some pretzel defense for Bowman.

He was suspended. For a reason. Not worth it.

If you win a cup...no one will care. If not...it will get worse.
 

FiveTacos

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nah, you've already made it up your mind that this is all one big cover-up with Bowman playing a big part, despite very little evidence that this is the case (with regards to Bowman) so you've made up your mind on the matter

It WAS a big cover up. To the point where a predator was allowed to go elsewhere without consequence and victimize others.

now you've got all the answers with the benefit of hindsight...and I know you'll grandstand with the "any decent human being would've asked more questions!"...yes, maybe in today's climate but that certainly wasn't the case 14 years ago,

Hindsight is all we have, since they kept it out of the public eye what they'd done (or hadn't done) for 11 years. And it resulted in more victims. That's sickening, and could have been prevented. It wasn't just Bowman, and no he's not the biggest culprit, but we cannot act like he was just some small fish in the organization.

14 years ago wasn't the stone ages. I've known sexual assault victims from well before that and seen what happens. Substance abuse, alcoholism, messed up relations are common. They never really get over it. This is not new info. We knew about Kennedy in the 90s. Fleury went public in 09. So don't tell me that it's only now that people are sensitive to the seriousness of sexual assault. If you didn't take sexual assault seriously years and years before 2010, the problem was you, not the world.

and it was a BRUTAL mistake not to ask more questions
doesn't make it right, but that's the reality

So the response is "oh well?"

For a brutal mistake, Bowman has gotten off pretty lightly. Years of glory, and now a new plum gig. Yeah he got a suspension, but now he has some Edmonton fans who will pretty much defend him to the bitter end.

if the NHL has re-stated him, Beach has given his blessing, and people in the that field like Sheldon Kennedy vouch for him, that's good enough for me

Forgiveness by the victims is central to the healing process. Not necessarily forgiving the predator, but certainly those who enabled or looked the other way. But forgiveness by the victims doesn't translate to, "ok now everyone has to believe he's a great guy.".

he's still an average GM at best

I don't really care if he's terrible or average or the greatest GM in the league, that's not the reason this is a troubling hire. And his on ice results aren't what's going to prove whether it was a good hire or not. He could be awful, but if he's truly changed then it's all good in my book. If not and it's all for show and he's the same guy from 2010, then I don't care if he wins multiple Cups, he's still a moral midget. Some things are more important than being good at a job.
 

Dead Coyote

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Yes, Bowman and Beach literally worked hand in hand on a hockey team and on the subject of player safety. And Kennedy has worked his entire life in that area and is a victim himself. Both have come out and supported Bowman, but apparently I’m supposed to beleive the rage baiters around here that want me to believe that Bowman is some irredeemable piece of shit? Nah. I’ll take their word and actually try to understand the facts of the case before I pass judgement.

For the record, I am both a victim of abuse and have also worked with and been friends with probably hundreds or thousands of other people in this situation. While Bowman may have been forgiven by Beach, or Beach may have supported him getting the job with the Oilers, and while Kennedy has said he's changed and helped out a lot, neither of these things are universal to every situation. If Beach forgave him, great. That's his own personal choice. It doesn't mean that any fans or other victims have to do the same, of which I might remind you there are at least two more that Aldritch was convicted of.

I believe in second chances and I believe in rehabilitation and not punishment, and if Bowman has met the criteria for that then great, I'd be more than happy to see him rejoin the industry and work his way back to where he was, or to go off and be a millionaire somewhere else. That doesn't mean I think he should be given a high profile GM job that pays a lot though. None of us know how true these things Bowman and Kennedy has said, nor do we know every thought and emotion that goes on in their heads or how his relationship is with Beach and the other victims.

People are upset that a millionaire is going to continue being a millionaire and that he's been given one of the best teams in the League to handle. I don't think there's any "rage baiting" going on here, except perhaps by some of the deleted posts in here about how Bowman did nothing wrong, or that it's Beach's fault that Aldritch went on to assault more kids,

Long story short its a victims place to report a crime. If you don’t understand why at this point google “what I should and shouldn’t do to help someone who was a victim of sexual assault” and educate yourself on those and many other implications of going against a victim’s wishes to report their crime for them.
This is not true and is dangerous misinformation. Victims are the hardest people to get to report a crime, and it's almost always someone else who has reached out to a victim and gives them support and the ability to get away from their abuser. You know what organization is often times great for doing that? The police. And don't get me wrong, American Police especially can be awful with victims. But they can also be good and even in the case of the situation that has been talked about here where the victim doesn't want to press charges or have any kind of investigation or support, calling the police still leaves a paper trail and allows for external investigations to be done that don't involve that specific victim at all, and can also provide evidence to be used.

Just because an investigation happens doesn't mean the victim is going to be publicized in the media or that everyone is going to know who they are. In super high profile situations like this one, yes it's more likely that happens since we're dealing with a high profile prospect of a sports team, but it's certainly not a requirement or part of the law and police investigate crimes that don't have victims or witnesses all the time. In many cases this is related to property, but you don't have to have 300 witnesses to car jacking to prosecute someone who stole 300 cars.

In any case the absolute best possible thing you can do in any instances of abuse is to give the victim support, follow up with them, and give them resources to escape the abuse. Calling the police, CPS, or other organizations that deal with the law, or shelters, rape crisis centres, or specific organizations in your area is one of the best things you can do for a victim, especially if they aren't being abused by a spouse/partner/someone they live with or has major control over them.

Yes, a lot of victims don't want to be publicized or tell anyone because of a variety of reasons. But that doesn't really help them, does it? As a victim your mentality often becomes that this doesn't make any sense, so it must either be something I'm doing, or there's some other reason for it. Because abuse doesn't make sense. We often think that if we just argue the point better, or if we stop doing the thing they're yelling at us for, or if we're just better in school or our job, or if we just don't report it as a rape and make them breakfast like we would after any other one night stand, that the abuse isn't really abuse after all, it's totally logical and we can cope with that better. You can be so gaslit by somebody that even the most basic of things become mistakes that you shouldn't make that justify your "abuse". This can't be abuse because they love you, they bought you a car, they don't make you pay rent, the birthed you, whatever it is. You hear it over and over again.

My point is that it's incredibly, incredibly hard for any one person to break out of those mentalities. The easiest way, by far, is to get support and to not be in that situation any more. THAT is why in a lot of cases (and no, not all of them) involving an agency or someone else is an extremely good thing to do. It forces the situation to change. If you have someone who follows up with you every week they're more likely to notice patterns of abuse and you're MUCH more likely to have evidence that doesn't just stem from your testimony and he said/she said talk.

The main place this can backfire is with spousal or domestic abusers who have much more control over your life and live with you, and therefore likely have access to you more than anyone else. But that's kind of a different story, because in this thread we're not talking about that.

The Blackhawks especially failed at taking these steps to satisfaction, and while Bowman is certainly by far not the only one to blame, he does share some of that blame. I wouldn't put him as the prime reason for any of this by any means, it's just a fact that no one really did what was needed to satisfaction when the situation happened.

I have to say that as someone who just read the entire thread at once it's pretty insane to me that people are crediting Bowman with the moves Tallon made as GM because he had so much clout with the organization that Tallon- the real GM- was forced to go along with his ideas, but 30 pages later there are people acting like informing his superior was the only thing he could do and that if he did anything else he would be fired by the president or something?
 

JPT

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For the record, I am both a victim of abuse and have also worked with and been friends with probably hundreds or thousands of other people in this situation. While Bowman may have been forgiven by Beach, or Beach may have supported him getting the job with the Oilers, and while Kennedy has said he's changed and helped out a lot, neither of these things are universal to every situation. If Beach forgave him, great. That's his own personal choice. It doesn't mean that any fans or other victims have to do the same, of which I might remind you there are at least two more that Aldritch was convicted of.

I believe in second chances and I believe in rehabilitation and not punishment, and if Bowman has met the criteria for that then great, I'd be more than happy to see him rejoin the industry and work his way back to where he was, or to go off and be a millionaire somewhere else. That doesn't mean I think he should be given a high profile GM job that pays a lot though. None of us know how true these things Bowman and Kennedy has said, nor do we know every thought and emotion that goes on in their heads or how his relationship is with Beach and the other victims.

People are upset that a millionaire is going to continue being a millionaire and that he's been given one of the best teams in the League to handle. I don't think there's any "rage baiting" going on here, except perhaps by some of the deleted posts in here about how Bowman did nothing wrong, or that it's Beach's fault that Aldritch went on to assault more kids,


This is not true and is dangerous misinformation. Victims are the hardest people to get to report a crime, and it's almost always someone else who has reached out to a victim and gives them support and the ability to get away from their abuser. You know what organization is often times great for doing that? The police. And don't get me wrong, American Police especially can be awful with victims. But they can also be good and even in the case of the situation that has been talked about here where the victim doesn't want to press charges or have any kind of investigation or support, calling the police still leaves a paper trail and allows for external investigations to be done that don't involve that specific victim at all, and can also provide evidence to be used.

Just because an investigation happens doesn't mean the victim is going to be publicized in the media or that everyone is going to know who they are. In super high profile situations like this one, yes it's more likely that happens since we're dealing with a high profile prospect of a sports team, but it's certainly not a requirement or part of the law and police investigate crimes that don't have victims or witnesses all the time. In many cases this is related to property, but you don't have to have 300 witnesses to car jacking to prosecute someone who stole 300 cars.

In any case the absolute best possible thing you can do in any instances of abuse is to give the victim support, follow up with them, and give them resources to escape the abuse. Calling the police, CPS, or other organizations that deal with the law, or shelters, rape crisis centres, or specific organizations in your area is one of the best things you can do for a victim, especially if they aren't being abused by a spouse/partner/someone they live with or has major control over them.

Yes, a lot of victims don't want to be publicized or tell anyone because of a variety of reasons. But that doesn't really help them, does it? As a victim your mentality often becomes that this doesn't make any sense, so it must either be something I'm doing, or there's some other reason for it. Because abuse doesn't make sense. We often think that if we just argue the point better, or if we stop doing the thing they're yelling at us for, or if we're just better in school or our job, or if we just don't report it as a rape and make them breakfast like we would after any other one night stand, that the abuse isn't really abuse after all, it's totally logical and we can cope with that better. You can be so gaslit by somebody that even the most basic of things become mistakes that you shouldn't make that justify your "abuse". This can't be abuse because they love you, they bought you a car, they don't make you pay rent, the birthed you, whatever it is. You hear it over and over again.

My point is that it's incredibly, incredibly hard for any one person to break out of those mentalities. The easiest way, by far, is to get support and to not be in that situation any more. THAT is why in a lot of cases (and no, not all of them) involving an agency or someone else is an extremely good thing to do. It forces the situation to change. If you have someone who follows up with you every week they're more likely to notice patterns of abuse and you're MUCH more likely to have evidence that doesn't just stem from your testimony and he said/she said talk.

The main place this can backfire is with spousal or domestic abusers who have much more control over your life and live with you, and therefore likely have access to you more than anyone else. But that's kind of a different story, because in this thread we're not talking about that.

The Blackhawks especially failed at taking these steps to satisfaction, and while Bowman is certainly by far not the only one to blame, he does share some of that blame. I wouldn't put him as the prime reason for any of this by any means, it's just a fact that no one really did what was needed to satisfaction when the situation happened.

I have to say that as someone who just read the entire thread at once it's pretty insane to me that people are crediting Bowman with the moves Tallon made as GM because he had so much clout with the organization that Tallon- the real GM- was forced to go along with his ideas, but 30 pages later there are people acting like informing his superior was the only thing he could do and that if he did anything else he would be fired by the president or something?
Best post in the entire thread
 

Harvey Birdman

…Need some law books, with pictures this time…
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For the record, I am both a victim of abuse and have also worked with and been friends with probably hundreds or thousands of other people in this situation. While Bowman may have been forgiven by Beach, or Beach may have supported him getting the job with the Oilers, and while Kennedy has said he's changed and helped out a lot, neither of these things are universal to every situation. If Beach forgave him, great. That's his own personal choice. It doesn't mean that any fans or other victims have to do the same, of which I might remind you there are at least two more that Aldritch was convicted of.

I believe in second chances and I believe in rehabilitation and not punishment, and if Bowman has met the criteria for that then great, I'd be more than happy to see him rejoin the industry and work his way back to where he was, or to go off and be a millionaire somewhere else. That doesn't mean I think he should be given a high profile GM job that pays a lot though. None of us know how true these things Bowman and Kennedy has said, nor do we know every thought and emotion that goes on in their heads or how his relationship is with Beach and the other victims.

People are upset that a millionaire is going to continue being a millionaire and that he's been given one of the best teams in the League to handle. I don't think there's any "rage baiting" going on here, except perhaps by some of the deleted posts in here about how Bowman did nothing wrong, or that it's Beach's fault that Aldritch went on to assault more kids,


This is not true and is dangerous misinformation. Victims are the hardest people to get to report a crime, and it's almost always someone else who has reached out to a victim and gives them support and the ability to get away from their abuser. You know what organization is often times great for doing that? The police. And don't get me wrong, American Police especially can be awful with victims. But they can also be good and even in the case of the situation that has been talked about here where the victim doesn't want to press charges or have any kind of investigation or support, calling the police still leaves a paper trail and allows for external investigations to be done that don't involve that specific victim at all, and can also provide evidence to be used.

Just because an investigation happens doesn't mean the victim is going to be publicized in the media or that everyone is going to know who they are. In super high profile situations like this one, yes it's more likely that happens since we're dealing with a high profile prospect of a sports team, but it's certainly not a requirement or part of the law and police investigate crimes that don't have victims or witnesses all the time. In many cases this is related to property, but you don't have to have 300 witnesses to car jacking to prosecute someone who stole 300 cars.

In any case the absolute best possible thing you can do in any instances of abuse is to give the victim support, follow up with them, and give them resources to escape the abuse. Calling the police, CPS, or other organizations that deal with the law, or shelters, rape crisis centres, or specific organizations in your area is one of the best things you can do for a victim, especially if they aren't being abused by a spouse/partner/someone they live with or has major control over them.

Yes, a lot of victims don't want to be publicized or tell anyone because of a variety of reasons. But that doesn't really help them, does it? As a victim your mentality often becomes that this doesn't make any sense, so it must either be something I'm doing, or there's some other reason for it. Because abuse doesn't make sense. We often think that if we just argue the point better, or if we stop doing the thing they're yelling at us for, or if we're just better in school or our job, or if we just don't report it as a rape and make them breakfast like we would after any other one night stand, that the abuse isn't really abuse after all, it's totally logical and we can cope with that better. You can be so gaslit by somebody that even the most basic of things become mistakes that you shouldn't make that justify your "abuse". This can't be abuse because they love you, they bought you a car, they don't make you pay rent, the birthed you, whatever it is. You hear it over and over again.

My point is that it's incredibly, incredibly hard for any one person to break out of those mentalities. The easiest way, by far, is to get support and to not be in that situation any more. THAT is why in a lot of cases (and no, not all of them) involving an agency or someone else is an extremely good thing to do. It forces the situation to change. If you have someone who follows up with you every week they're more likely to notice patterns of abuse and you're MUCH more likely to have evidence that doesn't just stem from your testimony and he said/she said talk.

The main place this can backfire is with spousal or domestic abusers who have much more control over your life and live with you, and therefore likely have access to you more than anyone else. But that's kind of a different story, because in this thread we're not talking about that.

The Blackhawks especially failed at taking these steps to satisfaction, and while Bowman is certainly by far not the only one to blame, he does share some of that blame. I wouldn't put him as the prime reason for any of this by any means, it's just a fact that no one really did what was needed to satisfaction when the situation happened.

I have to say that as someone who just read the entire thread at once it's pretty insane to me that people are crediting Bowman with the moves Tallon made as GM because he had so much clout with the organization that Tallon- the real GM- was forced to go along with his ideas, but 30 pages later there are people acting like informing his superior was the only thing he could do and that if he did anything else he would be fired by the president or something?
Survivor to survivor I could not have said it any better. Well done my friend. And as someone that did not confront what happened till I was well into my 30's years and years after my abuse. It is incredibly confusing and challenging. Now I never opened my mouth and said anything about it over all that time so no one knew to try and help me, but once I did, getting support and expert advice helped me realize how much I had been suffering in silence. So I 1000% concur the best thing you can do is just try to direct someone to get help and just be supportive. Changed my life when I did.
 

FiveTacos

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The Blackhawks especially failed at taking these steps to satisfaction, and while Bowman is certainly by far not the only one to blame, he does share some of that blame. I wouldn't put him as the prime reason for any of this by any means, it's just a fact that no one really did what was needed to satisfaction when the situation happened.

And let's be real here .... What we already know about the way they handled it was terrible, but there's probably even more terrible things they don't want you to know. Proof? They still to this day are settling with victims while tacking on an NDA. Why the need for an NDA if everything they failed at and are culpable for is already in the report? No, there's likely more dirty laundry the Hawks still don't want to come out. It must be really really bad.

I have to say that as someone who just read the entire thread at once it's pretty insane to me that people are crediting Bowman with the moves Tallon made as GM because he had so much clout with the organization that Tallon- the real GM- was forced to go along with his ideas, but 30 pages later there are people acting like informing his superior was the only thing he could do and that if he did anything else he would be fired by the president or something?

Always gonna be a few. But if ever there were something worth being fired over, this would have been it ... not that I think they'd have done so, since the whole point was to keep it quiet, and suddenly firing your GM days from a Cup would have been the opposite of quiet.
 

FiveTacos

Registered User
Oct 2, 2017
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Survivor to survivor I could not have said it any better. Well done my friend. And as someone that did not confront what happened till I was well into my 30's years and years after my abuse. It is incredibly confusing and challenging. Now I never opened my mouth and said anything about it over all that time so no one knew to try and help me, but once I did, getting support and expert advice helped me realize how much I had been suffering in silence. So I 1000% concur the best thing you can do is just try to direct someone to get help and just be supportive. Changed my life when I did.

It'd be hard for an adult to deal with, for young people it's almost impossible. Out of people I know or suspect were victims, all of them were so young when it happened, and didn't always have that support. I know one person who became a teen runaway. And sadly one friend I suspected of being a victim (who most people just saw as a delinquent) ultimately escaped via a shotgun in his mouth. The people who do this are absolute monsters on the level of serial killers.

So it's infuriating to read people whose #1 concern in these situations is the falsely accused and how their lives get ruined. Those people have no idea what a ruined life is until they sit and talk with abuse/assault victims. Go listen to that interview by the mother of the assaulted HS kid and then come back and try to argue that it's understandable to do nothing in order to protect the accused.

And if you hear that, you're never going to argue something as galactically stupid as, "I feel bad there were more victims as a result of doing nothing, but at least he respected the chain of command! That's what's important."

Speaking of which, Bowman's resorting to generic PR speak when it came to being asked about John Doe 2 doesn't exactly inspire confidence that he's truly seen the light either. He seemed genuine when talking about Beach, but that other part sounded like 2010 not-my-problem Bowman.
 
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PaulD

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Hilarious to see Oilers fans white knighting in this thread... something tells me they werent so kind in the previous threads about Bowman, or that they'd be this way had Bowman been hired by the Flames or some other team.
Maple Leaf Gardens.
Cliff Fletcher
 

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