NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread - PHASE FOURTEEN! Part One!

[Lord Defect]

One of these days you will come to realize that you are wrong, and hopefully even stop whining about it and enjoy Bill Murray's presence instead.

I’m getting my monkey tree shaken by the owner of the Pufts. I can’t help it man.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I’m getting my monkey tree shaken by the owner of the Pufts. I can’t help it man.

That's a shame. Thoughts and prayers for your monkey tree, whatever the f*** that means.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

I had to call an audible here for schematic reasons. You can't run a Tampa 2 without Derrick Brooks and you can't make RANCH without Spite Keyboard Daryl "Captain" Dragon. Just trust me on that first bit.

In a catalogue composed entirely of schlocky elevator music, there is a particular standout. Truly the worst song to ever chart in the US, with a video production that should have landed someone a trial at The Hague.



@Striiker I feel like I owe you an apology for having to mention you in the same post.

 

[Striiker]

@Striiker I feel like I owe you an apology for having to mention you in the same post.

it's ok i deserve this

 

[Young Sandwich]

@Captain Dave Poulin

The Spite Supergroup of The Sexpos will be known as Compulsory Castration.

 

[Lord Defect]

That's a shame. Thoughts and prayers for your monkey tree, whatever the f*** that means.

 

[Striiker]

Spite Bagpipes - Quavo

I was subjected to "Migos" (the trio below) during some random Call of Duty presentation thing at some point and it was unreal how horrible they were.

I don't even know which of the three he is. They're all equally shit.

@CanadianFlyer88 your turn

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Spite Bagpipes - Quavo

I was subjected to "Migos" (the trio below) during some random Call of Duty presentation thing at some point and it was unreal how horrible they were.

I don't even know which of the three he is. They're all equally shit.

@CanadianFlyer88 your turn

Great spite. I'm super proud of you for finding a musician to take.

 

[BiggE]

One of these days you will come to realize that you are wrong, and hopefully even stop whining about it and enjoy Bill Murray's presence instead.

Your optimism is cute. Utterly misplaced and hopeless, but cute.

 

[Lord Defect]

Your optimism is cute. Utterly misplaced and hopeless, but cute.

Right? Wait..

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

Directing our attention away from Alanis Morissette and Phil Collins (at least someone brought them to their Quackverse doom), the Seattle Sockeyes are disgusted to select as our female vocalist for Cream Filled Oasis Hole, the incredibly annoying, Kesha.

@BernieParent, be careful the next time you're in the club because "boys try to touch [your] junk".

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

@JojoTheWhale I'm on episode three, and the Elmore Leonardness of the source material is very apparent.

 

[ajgoal]

@JojoTheWhale I'm on episode three, and the Elmore Leonardness of the source material is very apparent.

No pick tipping

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

Directing our attention away from Alanis Morissette and Phil Collins (at least someone brought them to their Quackverse doom), the Seattle Sockeyes are disgusted to select as our female vocalist for Cream Filled Oasis Hole, the incredibly annoying, Kesha.

@BernieParent, be careful the next time you're in the club because "boys try to touch [your] junk".

that s is a $

 

[BiggE]

that s is a $

Ew

 

[pit]

@Striiker I feel like I owe you an apology for having to mention you in the same post.

Did you miss the earlier post about him putting the lead singer of Smash Mouth in his super group? He deserves this.

it's ok i deserve this

I'm glad you agree. As your punishment, listen to this.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

that s is a $

I'm not typing that stupid shit, she can f*** off.

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

that s is a $

I didn't want to give her the satisfaction.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

I didn't want to give her the satisfaction.

Between that and "Cream Filled Oasis Hole" you're making it real hard to not make a joke.

 

[Rebels57]

If anyone takes my Spite Drummer, there will be hell to pay.

 

[Striiker]

I'm glad you agree. As your punishment, listen to this.

If you think this is punishment then you don’t understand my little rodent brain at all.

I’m already 6 hours into the 10 hour version today.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

@JojoTheWhale I'm on episode three, and the Elmore Leonardness of the source material is very apparent.

It is gloriously Leonardy indeed.

 

[BernieParent]

Directing our attention away from Alanis Morissette and Phil Collins (at least someone brought them to their Quackverse doom), the Seattle Sockeyes are disgusted to select as our female vocalist for Cream Filled Oasis Hole, the incredibly annoying, Kesha.

@BernieParent, be careful the next time you're in the club because "boys try to touch [your] junk".

First, thank you for that sage advice @CanadianFlyer88. Also, we noticed, too, that you misspelled Ke$ha, as if your spite wasn't topped up to overflowing.

"The act of choosing musicians out of spite can lead one in several directions. Like many, we have picked individuals who have fostered out-of-control egos so as to eclipse their own artistic contributions. Some inspired individuals have identified the sordid community who went beyond mere ego trips and committed heinous crimes. Still others accurately identified musicians whose reputation exceeds their musical ability.

"We would like to venture into a fourth category: musicians who are good at making truly awful music. With this in mind, we reach back to our childhood to bring on board ... temporarily ... a maker of music that for the life of us we couldn't understand was enjoyed by some as a novelty. With apologies for introducing him and his noise to those who have lived blissfully without knowledge of him, we draft Tiny Tim, singer and ukelele player:



"We do take some malevolent glee in considering how Kanye and Noel Gallagher will attempt to contribute to this song alongside a goth-before-there-was-goth warbling caterwauler. Linda McCartney, on the other hand, will have no trouble 'harmonizing'."

And what a horrid introduction to the next pick by @Rebels57.

 

[DancingPanther]

Bieber hate. What year is it?

 

[Young Sandwich]

My yet-to-be-named FOG Spiteband needs a drummer to join Ted Nugent and Wes Scantlin, two of the biggest shitheads to ever do it. I can't think of anyone better than...

*DRUM ROLL PLEASE*

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JUSTIN BIEBER



Yes, this obnoxious puke has the audacity to get behind a kit from time-to-time. Take him back, Canada. Take him back, lock him up, and throw away the key.

I think he was someone's rental pickup. I had him on my list too.