NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread - MIGHTY PHASE SEVENTEEN! Part One!

[JojoTheWhale]

Um, actually, that's my gif sir.

I @Lord Defect ed a shitpost. I apologize profusely.

 

[Asnito]

@JojoTheWhale picked the original of that bald bitch. You guys are nuts.

He knows class when he sees it

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Messier > Hayes?

I refuse to answer that.

 

[BernieParent]

I'm actually surprised we haven't gotten more of these baffled drop-ins. In fact, this may be the first from outside of our own board. We haven't even had many from ours - I think everyone is scared lolz.

You would think someone from Ottawa would recognize the importance of alternative reasons to post when your hockey team is monkey barf.

 

[CanadianFlyer88]

I @Lord Defect ed a shitpost. I apologize profusely.

My Joker mishap seems less embarrassing now.

 

[ajgoal]

While our skaters will do their best to play keep away with the puck, eventually there may be a shot against. And since @JojoTheWhale ruined my plan to clone my own goalie...

Clone Player #2: Andrei Vasilevskiy, G

 

[ajgoal]

@Magua the best part of waking up is finding you are up.

 

[ajgoal]

Tf is this

This is pretty normal as far as categories go. Look back at around rounds 4-8 if you want to see some weirdness.

 

[Lord Defect]

This is pretty normal as far as categories go. Look back at around rounds 4-8 if you want to see some weirdness.

Celebrity chicken

 

[mja]

Tf is this

You stumbled upon this by searching Stutzle, didn't you?

 

[Magua]

I was going to make a different pick, but it will have to wait. I cannot pass up the chance to draft maybe the 2nd best defenseman of all time, the guy with all dem points. If Gordie Howe’s prime was half of Methuselah’s lifetime, this guy’s wasn’t far behind. 19 years of top 4 Norris finishes; 22 years of top 7. If this is all an elaborate science experiment, we want to analyze those genes.

The Honolulu Ghibli greet our latest affront to nature: Clone Ray Bourque (D)

******

@BiggE — dazzle me, Guru

 

[DancingPanther]

Tf is this

Copium

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

I almost did this too. Remember he’s no longer a Penguin in this universe. He’s yours entirely. And you can probably pay him in mayonnaise.

Sadly since the Chimpanzee’s Official Team Currency is Bitcoin that’s what he’ll be paid in.

Now on the Desert Ducks? They’ll be paid in cookies.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

Tf is this

Take notes and share it with the rest of the world. You’re one of the few outsiders that have peaked into this marvelous world.

 

[Striiker]

I was going to make a different pick, but it will have to wait. I cannot pass up the chance to draft maybe the 2nd best defenseman of all time, the guy with all dem points.

Sorry for taking #1

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

Take notes and share it with the rest of the world. You’re one of the few outsiders that have peaked into this marvelous world.

Remind him to Venmo me the licensing fees.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

Remind him to Venmo me the licensing fees.

It’s in the fine print somewhere. We’ll get him when he doesn’t read it all and we can sue him for principle, interest, and damages.

Good thing we picked lawyers, amirite?

 

[BiggE]

He was 6’4, 205 pounds and from the mid 1950s to the late 1960s he was the best center in the NHL. In 1125 games he put up 507 goals and 1219 points, was a 7 time 1st team all star and a 4 time 2nd team, he won 2 Hart trophies, an Art Ross trophy and a Conn Smythe trophy and he led the Habs to 10 Stanley Cups in his 17 year career. I can only imagine how dominant he will be with modern day nutrition, training and equipment.

Please welcome to Jacksonville, playing center, our clone, LE GROS BIL, JEAN BELIVEAU!!

@BernieParent , my dear rival, come make a blessed pick!

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

HAIL TO THE FORESKINS! HAIL STDs! HAIL TO THE FORESKINS! YOU HAVE A DISEASE!

We start the day with @BiggE on the clock, @BernieParent on deck, @Rebels57 on the lido deck, and CanadianFlyer88 on the lido afterdeck.

Peter King just called Daniel Snyder a "horse crap owner" That's where the opening salvo came from - I have Football Team on the brain. That new name, "Commanders," is horse crap too, if I'm being honest. But it might not be as bad as "Guardians." I mean, come on. I'm all for getting all the racist shit that is actually racist out of sports, and both of those are cases of blatant racist shit nobody needs to see anymore. But come up with a good name, a cool name, a unique name. There are about a million out there, some of them in the minor leagues, some of them in this here crazy Quackverse, innit.

I think mja was right about that stranger wandering in here after searching for my boy Stutzle. I couldn't figure out how he found us or why he would post that dumb gif in here until I saw that. Either way, I'm happy to finally have TIMMEH! TIM TIM TIMMEH! My organization is dangerously cool, and it's getting cooler by the minute. I know you don't believe me, because not everyone is into the simping weeb shit that I am, but listen to my minor league goal song again and imagine trying to fight against a team and a home crowd that has that energy behind it and targeted at your good selves. And that's just my minor-league team! Good luck! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

It’s in the fine print somewhere. We’ll get him when he doesn’t read it all and we can sue him for principle, interest, and damages.

Good thing we picked lawyers, amirite?

You're not wrong, brother. My lawyer is a huge pervert.

 

[JojoTheWhale]

But it might not be as bad as "Guardians."

I go back and forth on this. The name itself isn't good, but the reference is. It's a tough one.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I go back and forth on this. The name itself isn't good, but the reference is. It's a tough one.

I like the reference too, but if the name itself, isolated from the reference, rolls off the tongue like a half-digested wet turd, it's an epic fail.

 

[BernieParent]

"The owners of the Tampa Bay FireSticks, eminently pleased to be back to drafting hockey players, will once again display our fondness for the goaltender, by selecting one of the all-time greats, Clone Bernie Parent.

"He was our inspiration to not just fall in love with this beautiful sport but also to become goalies ourselves and to eschew our home team to follow the Flyers."

The phrase "We pass the turn to @Rebels57" has become an auto-fill for this account.

 

[Lord Defect]

Take notes and share it with the rest of the world. You’re one of the few outsiders that have peaked into this marvelous world.

I imagine for an outsider this is like looking into the ark of the covenant.

 

[mja]

I imagine for an outsider this is like looking into the ark of the covenant.