Movies: Last Movie You Watched and Rate it | {Insert Appropriate Seasonal Greeting Here}

[Spring in Fialta]

Love Exposure (2008). B+
The cinematic equivalent of a double-album that has numerous bangers, but when you sit down and actually listen to the whole thing, you realize there are plenty of tracks you could probably do without. Corinthians 13 topped the Hot 100 for months -- yet another case of the cover surpassing the original.

f*** me if this 4-hour movie doesn't feel like it happens in 83 minutes

 

[kihei]

f*** me if this 4-hour movie doesn't feel like it happens in 83 minutes

Normally I would concur, but that is too much to ask.

 

[shadow1]

Drunken Master (1978) - 7/10

A troublemaking young man is trained by a vagabond to learn the martial art form called Drunken Boxing.

Jackie Chan stars as Wong Fei-Hung, a talented but misguided fighter. After inadvertently shaming his family - first by accidentally making a pass at his cousin, and next by (justifyingly) beating up the son of a wealthy man - Fei-Hung's father punishes him by forcing him to train harder in martial arts. Fei-Hung is sent to train with Beggar So (Siu-Tin), a homeless functioning alcoholic whose disheveled appearance masks the fact that he's a great martial artist. It's a good thing for Fei-Hung, as a ruthless assassin (Jeong-Lee Hwang) is on the loose...

Drunken Master was directed by Woo-Ping Yuen, and tells a fictionalized story of real person Wong Fei-Hung, a famous 19th century martial artist. Fei-Hung has been portrayed over 100 times in film and on TV, with big stars like Jet Li (Once Upon a Time in China series) and Gordon Liu (1981's Martial Club) playing the folk hero. However, Jackie Chan was the first to play Fei-Hung in a comedic sense, and the result is one of Chan's most well known films.

Drunken Master tells a simple, but classic, martial arts story about man who betters himself by training, and is forced to use his newfound skills against a challenging opponent. The film is very light on plot, but manages to stand out from other movies at the time due to its infusion of comedy and fighting, which Jackie - age 24 in this movie - would later go on to claim worldwide fame for.

I do think the film drags at times in the first half. Though the action-comedy was unique at the time, much of the dialogue and situational humor falls flat for me when compared to most of Jackie Chan's later films. However, things get really good towards the middle once Fei-Hung masters all of the drunken boxing stances, and later gets to use them on his foes. The film's final fight scene between Jackie and Jeong-Lee Hwang is the best part of the film, featuring great martial arts choreography and limited cuts.

Overall, Drunken Master is a very simple film, but it is effective. The movie does feel very dated, even compared to something like 1980's The Young Master, which came out only two years later (for example, it's one of those movies where someone blows into the microphone every time a character throws a punch or kick). Regardless of that, Drunken Master has its place in martial arts film history and is Jackie Chan's most famous 1970's effort. It's a must watch for fans of either the genre or the actor.

(Note: The English dub of this movie is terrible. My DVD has both an English and Cantonese audio track, but there's an issue where the Cantonese track will occasionally (4 or 5 times) switch to English audio before switching back. Nice going, Columbia TriStar.)

 

[ItsFineImFine]

Utama (2022) Directed by Alejandro Loayza Grisi 7A

Is this getting a streaming release? I don't see it on any streaming platform. I see an x265 mkv file of it to download but it's very compressed so I'd rather wait to see it on a better copy or on streaming.

 

[Tasty Biscuits]

f*** me if this 4-hour movie doesn't feel like it happens in 83 minutes

I was actually thinking the same thing through almost the entire thing. Then the zero church takes center stage and all of a sudden I was really feeling the endeavor.

 

[kihei]

Short reviews for long movies!

Love Exposure (2008). B+
The cinematic equivalent of a double-album that has numerous bangers, but when you sit down and actually listen to the whole thing, you realize there are plenty of tracks you could probably do without. Corinthians 13 topped the Hot 100 for months -- yet another case of the cover surpassing the original.

I've been mulling this one over. While I respect this opinion and see it as not unreasonable at all, it's a bit of a moot point to me. Sion Sono rolls this way in just about all his movies, taking great risks all over the place and seeming to run on intuition as much as common sense. He is a tightrope walker by choice which is one reason his movies always seem to me to be so audaciously immediate and unpredictable. To mix metaphors, I just doubt that one could eliminate the excess without spoiling the broth.

 

[pegcity]

Not sure where to dump this comment.

Lots of good movies coming out this year. Might be the best year in recent memory.

Mario
Barbie
Oppenheimer
Dune 2
Guardians of the Galaxy 3
Killers of the Flower Moon
Elemental (Pixar)
Mission Impossible
Rebel Moon (might be good)
Napoleon (Ridley Scott)

 

[Tasty Biscuits]

To mix metaphors, I just doubt that one could eliminate the excess without spoiling the broth.

Yeah, that's absolutely fair as well. To further mix metaphors, the movie gave me hit after hit and I rode that high longer than I thought possible, but when I eventually crashed back down I was still at the party unable to leave.

I had only seen Why Don't You Play In Hell (everyone remembers their first) and Tokyo Tribe prior -- I'm absolutely on board with Sono and certainly will be seeking out more of his work.

 

[MVP of West Hollywd]

Was Fabelmans any good? I'm kind of burned out on the whole "Hollywood's ode to Hollywood" genre. Cinema Paradiso pretty much covered it.

This felt different than those types of movies to me as I felt Spielberg was mainly interested in the personal part. Filmmaking is played for him as a way to have some control when his family life is spiralling, and also because he's good at it.

 

[ItsFineImFine]

3 Women (1977) - 7.5/10

Probably the best Altman film I've seen, I'm not a huge fan of his generally more chaotic and aimless stuff. This does turn into that a bit but not till the final third. It sets up to a lovely bit of Mulholland Dr sort of surrealness set in 70s California which moves at a perfect pace without being boring and having enough of a hazy intrigue to keep you fixed onto the characters.

Not sure where to dump this comment.

Lots of good movies coming out this year. Might be the best year in recent memory.

Mario Skip
Barbie Wildcard but probably crap
Oppenheimer Must-watch but might be biggest disappointment
Dune 2 Should be very good
Guardians of the Galaxy 3 Should be a fun watch
Killers of the Flower Moon Should be decent
Elemental (Pixar) Don't care
Mission Impossible Should be good
Rebel Moon (might be good) Can't be worse than his DCU stuff but have low hopes
Napoleon (Ridley Scott) Should at least look good

My thoughts on these. Don't see anything special from other recent years. Seems like a lot of directors past their peak imo and I doubt any of these end up being movie of the year.

 

[shadow1]

Drunken Master II: The Legend of Drunken Master (1994) - 8/10

A martial artist comes into possession of an ancient Chinese artifact - which the British consul is trying to steal.

Jackie Chan returns as Wong Fei-Hung, a martial artist whose trademark style is Drunken Boxing. While trying to avoid paying taxes on ginseng during a train ride, Fei-Hung accidentally switches packages with Master Fu Wen-Chi (Lau Kar-Leung), a high ranking military officer who was transporting an ancient jade seal. The British consul, in the process of smuggling artifacts out of China, want to steal the jade seal and come after Fei-Hung. Fei-Hung must rely on his skills in Drunken Boxing to defend himself, but overuse of this controversial style has negative consequences...

The Legend of Drunken Master was directed by stars Lau Kar-Leung and Jackie Chan. This was Chan's first period piece martial arts film since 1983's Fearless Hyena 2, a movie he famously walked off the set of. Drunken Master II similarly had a troubled shoot, with the two men butting heads over action direction, arguing about details even down to the style of martial arts used in the film. Lau Kar-Leung left the project before completion, leaving Jackie to take over directorial duties. Despite behind the scenes drama, The Legend of Drunken Master went on to be the highest grossing theatrical film in Hong Kong history (at the time) and was later found theatrical success in North America and Europe in the year 2000, more than half a decade after its release.

Drunken Master II is only a loose sequel to the original, with the only returning cast being Jackie Chan as historical figure Wong Fei-Hung. Unlike the bare bones story of its predecessor, this sequel is much more plot heavy and features political commentary about the pre-WW1 British Empire. The film has a very unusual mix of comedy and drama, with some scenes that are deadly serious, but other which are goofy to the extreme (more on that later).

Action wise, this is one of Jackie Chan's best efforts, and that's obviously saying something given his body of work. Drunken Master II has a number of classic fight scenes, my favorite of which being the tea house fight against the axe gang. The film's final fight between Jackie Chan and Ken Lo (Jackie Chan Stunt Team member, and Chan's former personal body guard) is the most well known however. Set in a factory and utilizing fire and hot metal, this epic battle reportedly took 4 months to shoot despite lasting only 7 minutes on the screen.

The Legend of Drunken Master also features a number of martial arts fighting techniques. In addition to Drunken Boxing, the styles of Hung Ga, Shaolin Kung Fu, Taekwondo, and Xing Yi Juan are also used in the film. Even without knowing the names of these styles, you can tell while watching that the martial artists in this film are using many different fighting techniques. For Jackie's part, in order to get his face red to give the appearance of being intoxicated while using Drunken Boxing, before every take he had to bend over for a while in order to get blood to rush to his head. That is an impressive amount of dedication and attention to detail.

Though the film is great, if it has one flaw it's Jackie's character of Wong Fei-Hung. It's almost ironic that I say that because this portrayal of Fei-Hung is arguably the iconic Jackie Chan performance. However, I have to point out that Fei-Hung is supposed to be in his mid-20's in Drunken Master II, but often behaves as though he's in his late teens. This is may be jarring to some audiences because Jackie Chan was 40 years old(!) when The Legend of Drunken Master was made, so you really have to suspend your disbelief. Fei-Hung's father in the movie (Ti Lung) was only 8 years older than Jackie in reality, while his step-mother (Anita Mui) was 9 years younger. As long as you can move past this fact, you'll enjoy the film though.

Overall, Drunken Master II both one of the best Jackie Chan and martial arts movies ever made, and is required watching for fans of the actor or genre. The film has appeared on several "top" lists, including a 2005 Time Magazine list for the Top 100 Films of all time. Unfortunately the Cantonese language version is not readily available, so make sure to check Youtube in order to not miss out on the final 30 seconds of the ending (cut out by Dimension Films, as they through the ending was too distasteful).

 

[ItsFineImFine]

The Menu (2022) - 5/10

I'm tired of the Midsommar-ization of movies. Maybe a decent if not imperfect script here played out in a really tiring and tedious 2 hour watch for me (albeit with some fun moments which it should've leaned harder into). Ralf Fiennes is probably more terrifying here than he is in Voldemort. The rest is dumb but not in a fun sense but more of a....this is just dumb. Maybe if the direction had a bit more surrealness to it it could've pulled it off but it was just cold and bland.

Also apparently people get REALLY pissed off if they aren't served bread at a restaurant, is this a thing? I don't really care.

edit: The director has just been directing TV the past decade and made one romcom film a dozen years ago which probably explains why his style is trying to be a copycat of something else and why it feels off.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

Moonlighting. Jeremy Irons plays a Polish expat leading a team of three others on a rehab of a London townhome. "The Boss" has sent them there with a meager budget for the four men to both do the job and at least eat and live extremely basically. Cheaper than paying licensed. Irons, the only one who speaks English, soon realizes the budget isn't going to cut it. He resorts to petty theft of food and other items to keep the work going. Meanwhile, Poland itself is in turmoil, a fact he conceals from his three coworkers again for the sake of the work.

This is some sadly still relevant social realism about people and systems exploiting the poor and disadvantaged as cheap labor. Reminded me of Bicycle Thieves in several ways, which is high praise. But this has the spirit of a thriller as every theft is a simple, but clever small-scale execution that has you on edge constantly worried Irons might get caught and for what? A loaf of bread? A Wrangler sweatshirt? The grocery store is absolutely in the right, but the hawk-eyed manager makes for an effective villain. Is she genuinely suspicious of Irons or does she just not like his accent?

Directed by Polish great Jerzy Skolimowski, it features one of the better voice over uses I've seen. Irons is often narrating. He and the team don't talk much and when they do it's in unsubtitled Polish (an effective choice to make us rely on tone, expressions and gestures to parse out what's happening). Key to the VO is Irons constant recounting of the budget which shrinks through the film as effectively as a ticking timer on a bomb.



Judgment Night. I watched this pretty much as a joke. Some friends and I were taking a road trip to a sporting event this past weekend and I thought it would be funny to pre-game with the 90s action flick. Anyone who remembers it likely does because of its legit great soundtrack.

It's a fairly forgettable affair where you don't eve have to squint to see the updated urban take on Deliverance that this surely was pitched as. It's got an exceedingly weird cast though, none of whom are all that great on their best days. This ain't their best day. It's almost a cliche to say "everyone is in a different movie" but the key performances here all feel like they're in different movies (Emilio Esteves, Cuba Gooding Jr., Stephen Dorff, Jeremy Piven and Dennis Leary). The only one I really like is creepy Peter Greene as a henchman. He gets it. But our four heroes are kinda bland. Esteves is the calm leader. Piven is coward, but kinda a hothead too. Gooding is the macho man, but also kinda a hot head. Dorff is young guy but also kinda a hot head. This is PEAK Leary 90s years so you get a couple of short riffs he probably rejected from his standup. Also, everyone is dumb. No one makes very smart decisions even when considering the pressure of the moment. And how is this f***er an hour and 50 minutes long? They're on the road within the first 5 minutes. There's very little setup. Where does all that time go?

The biggest bummer is that I thought it would be funny to anoint my friends as each one of the characters for the trip, but they're so indistinct I feel like we're all four Emilio Estevezes. That's probably good for my real life relationships but it's bad for a movie. We actually did get detoured off the highway twice. Once in both directions. My friends were not nearly as amused as I was when I would yell "JUDGMENT NIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGHT."

Soundtrack still rules.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

Death on the Nile. The most recent Kenneth Branagh one. I've watched three versions of this story in the past year (Ustinov, Suchet were the other Poirots) and this was my least favorite by a good margin. The CGI is abhorrent. Some of the worst I've seen in a major movie in some time. I don't know if actual filming was impacted by Covid (I know the release was) but the amount of green screen (or whatever screen) in this shocked me.

I don't mind some of the tweaks from the book and from previous versions. I get a desire to make some changes from a familiar story already told several times. I'm not precious about most of that stuff. I did find the opening prologue to be unnecessary and silly. A man with a good mustache owes no one an explanation. It just is. The greater sin is the ham handed theme of LOVE and how it makes you do CRAZY THINGS. From Poirot's opening through every single character, everyone loves (or loved) someone else (you know because they won't stop talking about it) and it may (or may not) make them do crazy things (again you know this because characters are constantly talking about it). It's a thematic brow beating that feels like it came from studio notes.

Those might have been surmountable obstacles though. A Poirot mystery ultimately lives and dies with its Poirot. Branagh has a couple of ok moments but he's mostly charmless. His serious dial is turned just a few notches too high. Again, this is probably to make him distinct from other portrayals, but a mopey, emo Poirot not only isn't fun for the viewer, it makes you question why other characters would even want him around.

Were there other people in this? I hardly noticed. Oh, Sophie Okenedo is enjoyable.

 

[ItsFineImFine]

It wasn't that terrible tbh but as soon as they had Poirot pull out a gun and start yelling then instantly lost a few points for me. Brannagh is what the people would call a philistine I think.

 

[Pranzo Oltranzista]

Anyone who remembers it likely does because of its legit great soundtrack.

Still have a few songs in my regular rotation.

 

[ItsFineImFine]

Sorcerer (1977) - 7.5/10

I think having already watched The Wages of Fear makes this a less powerful watch as a result. The first half diverges significantly enough from the original but the second half is a grittier copycat. It's actually the first half I think does a better job whether it be the more colourful cinematography or just characters having more to do. The second half is built on suspense and butt-clecnching with the added colour of 70's surrealism and soundtracks which don't do much for me but I generally prefer the sort of more measured suspense in classic films than that of post-60s ones. I also think Clouzot's classic had characters which felt a bit more fleshed out and ones which you were emotionally invested in whereas here it's just Roy Schneider who feels like the protagonist and everyone else is everyone else.

As for the question of which to watch first, I still don't think I'd be able to decide. I'd say if you can sit through the first 50 minutes then the original is better but if the person watching has either a poor attention span or isn't used to classic film pacing then probably the 70's on.

 

[shadow1]

Half a Loaf of Kung Fu (1978) - 5/10

A young man poses as a dead kung fu master in order to collect bounty money, but is forced to learn kung fu for real once it's stolen.

Jackie Chan stars as Jiang, a drifter bouncing between odd jobs. One day, he witnesses a bounty hunter kill the man he's hunting, only to succumb to his wounds. Jiang decides to collect the bounty reward and pose as the bounty hunter, a decision which results in all of his alter ego's enemies coming after him. After his reward money is stolen, Jiang must learn kung fu for real.

Half of a Loaf of Kung Fu was directed by Chi-Hwa Chen, and marks one of Jackie Chan's earliest efforts. The film was released in 1978, the same year as classic Drunken Master. However, according to information I've read, the film was produced earlier than that and was shelved, only being released after Jackie Chan's star began to rise. Given as I cannot verify this information, take it with a grain of salt.

Half a Loaf of Kung Fu is a very simple, extremely low budget movie. From a storytelling perspective, there isn't a whole lot to say: the story is basic, and the accompanying fight scenes are average. This film would be destined for a 50-pack DVD of Kung Fu movies, if not for the fact that it features a very young Jackie Chan.

Chan is the glue holding the movie together, and it's mostly for his comedy. The film is intended to be a parody of kung fu movies, but most of the other actors play their roles straight. This allows Jackie's comedic performance to stand out even more, with a lot of the comedy coming from his facial expressions (which is one of his greatest strengths and what makes his films so accessible). The film does have comedic moments that don't work - like the many cheesy scenes where the video and audio are sped up - but enough do that the film is surprisingly watchable.

Overall, Half a Loaf of Kung Fu isn't a good movie. It's the random Kung Fu movie you find on TV at 1am when you're trying to fall asleep. I thought for sure it was going to earn a 3 or 4 star rating from me before I (re)watched it. But somehow - despite terrible picture quality and a barebones plot - it managed to hold my attention, and enough of the comedy worked that it barely ekes out a 5 from me. Still, only seek this one out if you're a diehard fan of Jackie Chan and/or Kung Fu movies.

 

[ItsFineImFine]

Panique! (1947) - 7/10

Took me a long time to realize I'd seen re-make of this film, the film Monsieur Hire which was a mediocre 80s French film. This was better once it got going and had a more satisfying conclusion. Also has more of that classic French charm which mixes a bit of Noir into a more chaotic style....it actually feels like it could've been directed by Clouzot, it reminded me of Le Corbeau.

 

[Chili]

You Only Live Once-1937

Eddie (Henry Fonda) is getting out of prison. As he is leaving, the warden warns him that he has already been in trouble three times, this would be his last chance. He wants to go straight and has a good reason, his girl Joan (Sylvia Sydney). She just wants a home and just when things are looking up...Some nice plot twists. The two leads are in top form. The first film loosely based on Bonnie and Clyde. Love on the run. Well done.

Shout at the Devil-1976

Set in Malta at the start of WWI, an Irish ivory poacher, who enjoys his drink (Lee Marvin) tricks an Englishman (Roger Moore) into joining him on an expedition up river. Dangerous trip, as they are hunting on land controlled by a German officer and his small army. And this leads to ongoing confrontation. Curious combination of leads. The director (Peter Hunt) was the editor for several of the early Bond films and directed On Her Majesty's Secret Service. Like a Bond film, there is plenty of action. There is an odd blend of comedy and violence. Supposed to be loosely based on a real incident. I do see why it is mostly forgotten now but it has it's moments, somewhat of a violent African Queen.

Shoeshine-1946 (subtitles)

'For sure, whoever invented elevators was a great man.'
'You're telling me, I slept in one for three months!'

Post WWII Rome, two young shoeshine boys are trying to save enough to buy a horse they like. The brother of one of them, tells them of a chance to make some money. They are asked to sell 2 stolen blankets to a fortune teller which leads them into alot of trouble. Powerful drama as the story untolds inside a boys prison. Very well told with a young cast. Like a Brute Force for boys (which came out within a year of this film). Top notch, absorbing film.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

Despite the wise counsel of others I did say f*** it and decided to watch Amsterdam.

It's like Oprah showed up on day 1 of filming and granted every actor a quirk. You get a twitch! And you get a funny delivery! And you get a physical deformity! And you get a silly mustache! And Christian Bale gets all of them!

Plays like a song out of tune from the very first note. I didn't know something could be both stilted and wacky, but this manages it.

Wasted effort from everyone involved, which is quite a few famous faces! Though I have to admit I did cackle when a certain character is run over with a car.

 

[Osprey]

Despite the wise counsel of others I did say f*** it and decided to watch Amsterdam.

It's like Oprah showed up on day 1 of filming and granted every actor a quirk. You get a twitch! And you get a funny delivery! And you get a physical deformity! And you get a silly mustache! And Christian Bale gets all of them!

Plays like a song out of tune from the very first note. I didn't know something could be both stilted and wacky, but this manages it.

Wasted effort from everyone involved, which is quite a few famous faces! Though I have to admit I did cackle when a certain character is run over with a car.

It sounds like you might have enjoyed it more if every character had been run over with a car.

 

[kihei]

EO (2022} Directed by Jerzy Skolimowski 7A

EO is a movie about a mule, sort of from the point of view of the mule. And, yes, odd though that sounds, it has been done before. The great Robert Bresson directed Au Hasard Balthazar in 1966, the story of another mistreated mule. EO is not so much a remake as an update. Where Balthazar was something of a stand-in for the human condition, EO represents a dreamier but no less pessimistic point of view. EO bears witness to the cruelty of man and to the peculiarities of fate that twist us to and fro. From his early days as a circus act to his eventual final stop, we watch the donkey's odyssey as he moves from one situation to the next, never quite settling in one place for very long. Most of the people he meets are not nice, and we watch EO bear innocent, dumb witness to their various barbarities. Safe to say, humans don't come across very well in this movie. Actually EO is at its best when it is at its most abstract and experimental, eschewing humans all together. For instance, there is a tense sequence where EO has to spend a stressful night in a scary forest and another sequence in which a mechanical creature eerily takes over for a while. While the movie is uneven, it is never dull. At 83, Polish director Jerzy Skolimowski has lost none of his technical virtuosity, his visual flair nor has his imagination dimmed in the least.

subtitles

 

[Osprey]

The Dish (2000) - 7/10

No, it's not the follow-up to The Menu. It's the true story (allegedly) of Australia's key role when Man landed on the Moon (allegedly). It's about a few scientists, led by Sam Neill, who operate a massive satellite dish in a small town in rural Australia and use it to receive and relay signals from Apollo 11 to NASA in Houston. I hadn't heard of this Aussie light comedy drama until last week and it was a very pleasant surprise. I found it to be funny, informative, sentimental and charming. All of the characters were likable and realistic, even though they were probably fictional. There's a little bit of drama, though the ending is never in doubt. What matters is that story is interesting and that it nails the landing (pun intended). I liked that it's an unabashedly feel-good movie of the 90s variety that instills pride and hope in humanity, rather than guilt and cynicism. They don't make films like this anymore.

The Castle (1997) - 6/10

A family of likable dimwits is threatened with eviction when an expanding airport "compulsorily acquires" their home, which the father astutely explains means that they're acquiring it compulsorily. It's a low budget Australian comedy from the same director as The Dish that perfectly captures Australians' quirky, self-deprecating sense of humor. Most of the humor comes from the family members not realizing how dumb they look and sound while being proud of how clever they think that they are. That blissful ignorance and the fact that they otherwise appear to be the perfect, loving family make them endearing and worth rooting for to keep their home, or "castle." I thought that the beginning and end were very funny and the middle less so, but amiable enough. I surely missed some humor because I'm not Australian, but I understood and appreciated enough of it and the movie's charm to enjoy it.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

It sounds like you might have enjoyed it more if every character had been run over with a car.

That would have been funny! A movie where every new character introduced is run over by a car five minutes later. It'd be like Sideshow Bob stepping on rakes. I'd be there opening night.