Confirmed with Link: Kings announce signing kovalchuk to 3 year contract.

[King'sPawn]

What if the moon were made of cheese? Would you eat it?

Not in one sitting. And I'd not eat all of it, otherwise I'd be floating in space about the size of the moon, and I'd have the worst case of constipation.

 

[tny760]

 

[Ollie Weeks]

Not in one sitting. And I'd not eat all of it, otherwise I'd be floating in space about the size of the moon, and I'd have the worst case of constipation.

Congratulations, you are now “moon.”

 

[KingsFan7824]

M, O, O, N, that spells Nebraska.

 

[deaderhead28]

Funny Thoughts To Ponder

[TBODY] [/TBODY]

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hotdogs? Are eyebrows considered facial hair? At a movie theater which arm rest is yours? If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? Why are there no 'B' batteries? If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his iPod? If man evolved from monkeys, how come we still have monkeys? How do you handcuff a one-armed man? When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest? If you are bald, what hair color do they put on your driver's license? If God sneezes, what should you say? Is it still illegal to park next to a fire hydrant, even if your car is on fire? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile? If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on? Do Jewish vampires still avoid crosses? If a mime is arrested, do they tell him he has a right to talk? In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"? Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? If vampires can't see their reflections, why is their hair always so neat? Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron? Can you daydream at night? Why do they call the little candy bars "fun sizes". Wouldn't it be more fun to eat a big one? What is Satan's last name? What is a picture of a thousand words worth? Why does quicksand work slowly? Can crop circles be square? If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor? Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic? Why doesn't the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie? When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible? Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Can animals commit suicide? Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop? Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth would change the direction of a bowling ball? What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant? If glassblowers inhale do they get a pane in the stomach? Is it rude for a deaf person to talk (sign) with their mouth full of food? If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on? Why do they sterilize lethal injections? Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home? Is a pessimist's blood type B-negative? Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts? If pro and con are opposites, wouldn't the opposite of progress be congress? Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don't taste or smell anything like it.? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs. Do Siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly? Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person? If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet? If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, why does it not go bad inside the cow? What's the difference between normal ketchup and fancy ketchup?

[TBODY] [/TBODY]

 

[Reclamation Project]

I made more money as a CPA working in Orange County but my quality of life skyrocketed when I moved to Mammoth and became a snowboard instructor.

I can certainly say for myself there is much more to life than money. I didn't realize so many here felt differently, but then again there's another reason why I left socal.

I chase pow in the winter, fish in the summer.

Quality of life + compensation =

When you enjoy doing something so much that it doesn't feel like work, everything else falls into place. Can't have others dictating your life, enjoy every moment. Far too many people stuck in a rat race that are miserable as shit.

Only if there were crackers in the craters. Several glasses of pinot noir would help as well.

Reported for hate speech!

 

[KingCanadain1976]

 

[Sleeping Dog]

Darn, I thought he was gonna check her into the boards.

 

[Fishhead]

Darn, I thought he was gonna check her into the boards.

Pfft. Soft Russians. We're screwed.

 

[KingsHockey24]

Myers is 6'8 , 230lbs.

 

[The Butcher]

Pfft. Soft Russians. We're screwed.

No boarding call?

 

[Reaper45]

Myers is 6'8 , 230lbs.

You forgot charmin soft.

 

[Vamos Rafa]

Is anyone else realizing that this is our biggest free agent signing since...Rob Scuderi? We couldn't even sign the corpse of Joe Thornton last year.

We don't sign free agents. We always have to trade for a star and convince him to re-sign with us.

 

[Frolov 6'3]

I would even say this FA signing is bigger than Pavol Demitra.


This guy is gonna score 30 goals for us and people still dont realize it.

 

[Ziggy Stardust]

I would even say this FA signing is bigger than Pavol Demitra.


This guy is gonna score 30 goals for us and people still dont realize it.

Judging by some comments, you'd think the Kings signed the next Steve Heinze.

 

[Rorschach]

I would even say this FA signing is bigger than Pavol Demitra.


This guy is gonna score 30 goals for us and people still dont realize it.

The way the Kings play, an extra 30 goals will probably mean an extra 30 points in the standings.

 

[Maynard]

Judging by some comments, you'd think the Kings signed the next Steve Heinze.

It’s because the jury is out on him. We don’t know whether or not he can still play at a high level in the NHL. I like the signing but he’s been in a lower level league playing against lesser competition for years. As much as I like all the KHL YouTube snipe clips, I’m going to wait to see how he does in the NHL before I get excited.

 

[Frolov 6'3]

KHL is not a Micky Mouse league. Former NHL superstar.
Best player at the Olympics.
Consisitant topscorer in the second best hockey league after he left.

You ask yourself if he can still play in the NHL ?

 

[KINGS17]

I don't think the KHL is a Mickey Mouse league. I think the best 20-29 year old players in the world generally play in the NHL though.

The goaltending Kovalchuk will see is going to be far superior to anything in the KHL. The defensemen are going to be bigger, stronger, and more agile as well.

 

[Raccoon Jesus]

The guy did nothing but dominate everything outside the NHL for the last 1.5 years. He seems healthy.

Even if his skating has gone completely bust (it hasn't), he still has the brain, hands, shot, size.

I think it's totally fair to be apprehensive a bit due to context, but the guy really couldn't do much more to show he's still got game outside the USA.

 

[KingsHockey24]

Ilya Kovalchuk has played over 800 games in the NHL; he know's what to expect.

 

[yankeeking]

The problem I have with t is the 35 yr old rule , it's not like he is JT who won't die or Marlowe who keeps playing at 38 or more it's just that he took the money and bailed before and if that happens again we are royally screwed , I think he is like Luc and is a natural goal scorer who will score more by mistake than kopi' s last three wingers together but could also get bored or homesick and bolt and that could doom us to the rebuild stage and while we all know it's coming it's sure more fun watching us win then watching us learn to win

PS. But make no mistake on opening night I will be cheering this Russian on like I was a member of the current administration Go Kings Go

 

[Kingsfan1]

Kovalchuk will not leave this time , he will stay all 3 years and either give all he’s got or fall flat on his face along with us . This is a more mature Kovalchuk and he wouldn’t humiliate himself in front so many of his NHL friends he’s been hanging with. Seeing how he is taking his training so seriously I can’t help but think he scores at least 25 goals and upwards of 55-60+ points .

We are returning to the Cup finals this year f*** these other teams . We have a deep lineup idc what anyone says . Along with some skilled young forwards coming along we will make noise.

 

[KopitarFAN]

Ilya Kovalchuk has played over 800 games in the NHL; he know's what to expect.

People act like we're talking about that Jan Kovar guy who signed with NYI and put up pretty good numbers over there. The moment Kovalchuk steps back on NHL ice, he will rank 5th among active players in goals (417), 4th if Nash does in fact retire. If Marleau can get 25+ at 36, 37 and 38, I think Kovalchuk can do it at 35.

 

[Bandit]

I don't think the KHL is a Mickey Mouse league. I think the best 20-29 year old players in the world generally play in the NHL though.

The goaltending Kovalchuk will see is going to be far superior to anything in the KHL. The defensemen are going to be bigger, stronger, and more agile as well.

So you're saying it's a Donald Duck league?