Early yesterday, I posted this: "If we win, I hereby solemnly pledge to write a focused poem extolling the virtues of expludong things."
Its not like I need to be pushed much into writing a Jets-based sonnet or speech. Expludong and Jets? Here we go.
The Virtues of Expludong
Soft! What light through yonder playoff standings breaks?
And yea verily, they say,
Expludong is the head that wears the Art Ross crown, and -
We of this Board accept thy unsung secondary mantle.
Aye; the media itself is expludong,
That croaks the spangled entrance of an Oily squad
Upon the playoffs.
Now - to business.
Come, you forwards:
Tomato, Farmleague, Doobhaus, Shuffles, Lurch, Lewis and Stats -
Tend on multiple goal thoughts, undress the Squealers here,
Expludong and fill Smith’s helm to the toe top-full with vulcanized rubber
Of direst cruelty! Expludong my beer;
To stopper the access and passage to remorse,
That no compunctious visitings of Draisaitl
Shake thy fell purpose, nor keep peace between
The effect and it!
Come, McDavid, to be expludong in Pionk’s embrace,
Let the mauler be maul’d well.
