It's a difficult question. I don't think you're wrong to suggest that the NHL's aesthetic is decidedly LAME. Personally, I choose to watch any and every game I can via Sportsnet or TSN, for the exact reasons you're saying. They can be as dull, but there is something valuable in listening to commentators talk about the sport with some level of detail and attention rather than obsessively shoving 'storylines' at every moment.
But I don't think it's only an issue of branding, or of costs. The reality is that Hockey is historically a geographically determined sport. In that way broader access is a recent trend, something that takes time. I believe that more than marketing in the sense that you've suggested, the NHL should be doing more to ensure that all teams have near-equal opportunity to compete financially. Adding something like the MLB's revenue sharing could help support teams like Arizona, Florida, Carolina, or even small market, but hockey-crazed, Ottawa and Winnipeg. Statistically, it's been proven that winning teams boost the growth of the youth game and local viewership drastically. Hell, I just left Seattle nine months ago after three years of living there—until the team was announced, nobody cared about hockey, then suddenly, there's nothing more exciting or talked about than the new team on the block, everybody takes an interest and everyone who knew me was asking me about it all the time, and trying to watch games with me like I was an insider.
The NHL has done a decent job investing in these non-traditional markets. But they're also (from a 'brand' standpoint) obsessed with tradition as a selling point of Hockey. Thus, they prevent themselves from really going 'all in' on the parity the claim to want so badly.
People not growing up skating makes a difference; your story comes off to me a bit like 'the exception proves the rule'. I grew up in a very traditional hockey market from an American standpoint (my town has the oldest rink in CT) and even there it wasn't common to like hockey—relative to the NFL, NBA, MLB. Firstly, because people didn't understand it at all. It's not even so simply a matter of having played or not played, it's about understanding what you're watching. Back when I started college people used to say about hockey that it's just too violent for them (then proceed to watch football). Then, when the league changed from emphasizing the violence to emphasizing speed, they say it's too fast and they can't follow it.
Ultimately, sports fandom is not complicated. You root for your local teams generally. I hate football but I cheered like a maniac watching the Giants during their two superbowl runs (and haven't seen a game since they were last in the playoffs). People just want winners. So, give them good teams and they'll want to watch.