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OT: 111th Obsequious Banter Thread: If threads were floors, this would be the tallest building in America

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What is your favorite summertime fruit?

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Wasn't me, but a friend of mine told me a story once where he was on the phone with a friend. While he's talking on the phone, he's also rummaging through stuff around his house, and doing so loudly enough that his friend finally asked him what he was doing. His answer was, "I can't find my phone" There definitely was some weed involved on that one.
 
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Surrounded By Ahos said:
Don’t feel bad. Every so often I will be driving my car and realize that I can’t feel my keys in my pocket and panic for a second before I remember what I’m doing.
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This was me for a long time. I was riding my bicycle everywhere for awhile and would always do the keys, wallet phone check while leaving the driveway onto the road. Once I started driving again I would do the check and always freak out because. I didn’t have my keys
 
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Anyone else just say screw it and start buying organic fruit after watching these anti pesticide reels
 
PDX Flyer said:
This was me for a long time. I was riding my bicycle everywhere for awhile and would always do the keys, wallet phone check while leaving the driveway onto the road. Once I started driving again I would do the check and always freak out because. I didn’t have my keys
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My absent-minded car story… Years ago when I was living in DC there was a coffee shop I liked to go to. It was 2 metro stops from me (in Dupont Circle if you’re familiar with DC) but on weekends sometimes I would just drive down and park nearby. So one Saturday that’s what I did. I probably stayed for a couple hours doing work on my laptop, then went home. Now, living in the city and not having a dedicated parking spot, sometimes remembering where I parked the car took some time.

A week later (I didn’t use the car during the week) I have to go out and I can’t find the car. Not on the street in front of my building, not in the parking lot behind the building, not on any nearby streets. I think, “shit, my car has been stolen.” So before I go back inside to call the police (pre-cell phone days) I try to remember when was the last time I saw the car. And suddenly I realize that the prior weekend, while I had driven to the coffee shop, when I came home I forgot that I had driven and took the metro home. It strikes me that I’ve left my car parked on a street in downtown DC for one entire week. And I remember exactly where I parked it. I take metro down there, walk to the spot and sure enough, there’s my car with like 4 parking tickets. It’s also accumulated a lot of dust and someone has written “wash me” on the window. Amazing that it wasn’t towed.
 
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Jack Straw said:
My absent-minded car story… Years ago when I was living in DC there was a coffee shop I liked to go to. It was 2 metro stops from me (in Dupont Circle if you’re familiar with DC) but on weekends sometimes I would just drive down and park nearby. So one Saturday that’s what I did. I probably stayed for a couple hours doing work on my laptop, then went home. Now, living in the city and not having a dedicated parking spot, sometimes remembering where I parked the car took some time.

A week later (I didn’t use the car during the week) I have to go out and I can’t find the car. Not on the street in front of my building, not in the parking lot behind the building, not on any nearby streets. I think, “shit, my car has been stolen.” So before I go back inside to call the police (pre-cell phone days) I try to remember when was the last time I saw the car. And suddenly I realize that the prior weekend, while I had driven to the coffee shop, when I came home I forgot that I had driven and took the metro home. It strikes me that I’ve left my car parked on a street in downtown DC for one entire week. And I remember exactly where I parked it. I take metro down there, walk to the spot and sure enough, there’s my car with like 4 parking tickets. It’s also accumulated a lot of dust and someone has written “wash me” on the window. Amazing that it wasn’t towed.
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When I lived in Hoboken we would always forget where the car was parked.
 
The asshole in the middle seat had to ducking turn around like 4 times to get shit from his family member in the row behind and he kept bumping into me when I was trying to sleep. Just as bad as a fat person.
 
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Danko said:
Quickest E.R Visit we've had as parents just now. Around 3:30 my 3 year old daughter (not my son this time surprisingly!) had what we think is a Febril Seizure after not feeling well at Daycare today, she came home and fell asleep on the couch with a blanket on, then woke up and had this strange look on her face then started starring blankely at the wall and wouldn't respond to us or blink or move, i was shouting in her face and clapping and nothing...called 911 and they sent an ambulance.

No one is at the E.R. at the childrens hospital today, guess everyones down the beaches for the holiday weekend. They ran a bunch of tests and got us out of there in around 3 hours total.

Being a parent is a trip man. Usually we are worried about my son when it comes to health issues, and surprisingly this was our first ambulance ride, my money was on him.
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She ok man?

Beef Invictus said:
My daughter, who is six, has begun rolling up her shorts to make them shorter. I was supposed to have a decade or so before I had to deal with this. Maybe it's finally time for my coma.
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The child is 6?????
 
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Wildfires are a little crazy today and nearing us. The 3 guys I golf with have all been evacuated. As of now, we are 3 kms from edge of closes evacuation area but fire is 16 kms away. The wind was blowing directly toward up but aound 9:30 the wind direction changed which led to us not getting evacuated yet. But we still have packed some thing up in case. Fingers crossed for tomorrow.


 
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Tripod said:
Wildfires are a little crazy today and nearing us. The 3 guys I golf with have all been evacuated. As of now, we are 3 kms from edge of closes evacuation area but fire is 16 kms away. The wind was blowing directly toward up but aound 9:30 the wind direction changed which led to us not getting evacuated yet. But we still have packed some thing up in case. Fingers crossed for tomorrow.


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Be safe man
 
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Spent a few hours putting flags on the graves of vets in a Trenton, NJ cemetery yesterday. First time we did it. The Mrs' uncle used to do it , but he passed a few months ago. The family and my father in law all did it today. Cemetery openned in 1859, so some of the eroded white sandstone markers could have been Civil War vets that we could not identify. Will do it again next year
 
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Tripod said:
@bennysflyers16 the edge of the fire is 7.7 kms from Glen Arbour golf course.

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Stay safe and best wishes. A few years back we had a lot of fires up and down the Cascades that wreaked havoc. My pup came from a horse farm that was in harms way and the logistics to keep all the farm animals safe was a nightmare. The only silver lining was how the communities came together to help.

Hope the winds die down and blow the right way. Those fire fighters are legends
 
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