Useless Thread MDCCXCIV: Zack Snyder Appreciation Thread

[Sega Dreamcast]

Congressional hearing of some sort, where they want to blame everything on Superman.

Because that's what makes for an exciting comic book movie.... POLITICS

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Some cops watching football on a TV, it's Gotham City vs Metropolis State.

Surely this is a weak metaphor

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

I don't feel like I have much to say so far.

Shit's happening and it's not very interesting

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Let's keep this to one post for a little while.

Cops see Batman at a crime scene. Batman flees.

Ugh, more Lois Lane. Bathtub scene, a little bit of sideboob.

Some nudity would liven this movie up, eh. Let's see some Super cock.

Hey, Superman and Lois kissing at an appropriate time and setting, rather than in the middle of a destroyed city with Zod still alive.

Jeremy Irons here to save this movie by having a boring conversation with Ben Affleck.

Jesse Eisenburg showing off some Kryptonite, I assume from the James Cameron looking dude.

Wait, how does LexCorp have access to Zod's body.

Why are all these women making googly eyes towards Jesse Eisenburg.

Bah god is he obnoxious.

Some guy negotiates with Lex, giving him access to the ship and Zod's body

 

[John Price]

Let's keep this to one post for a little while.

Cops see Batman at a crime scene. Batman flees.

Ugh, more Lois Lane. Bathtub scene, a little bit of sideboob.

Some nudity would liven this movie up, eh. Let's see some Super cock.

Hey, Superman and Lois kissing at an appropriate time and setting, rather than in the middle of a destroyed city with Zod still alive.

Jeremy Irons here to save this movie by having a boring conversation with Ben Affleck.

Jesse Eisenburg showing off some Kryptonite, I assume from the James Cameron looking dude.

Wait, how does LexCorp have access to Zod's body.

Why are all these women making googly eyes towards Jesse Eisenburg.

Bah god is he obnoxious

ass keeps spamming the rpg in a close quarters operation locker

there are no vehicles nearby put the rpg away lol

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

ass keeps spamming the rpg in a close quarters operation locker

there are no vehicles nearby put the rpg away lol

40 minutes in and I'm so bored.

We get it, Batman wants to stop Superman and Lex wants to kill all supers, let's go

 

[John Price]

40 minutes in and I'm so bored.

We get it, Batman wants to stop Superman and Lex wants to kill all supers, let's go

I told you lol there like 2 hours before any fighting

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

I am not liking Ben Affleck as Batman.

He looks like he doesn't give a single shit

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Oh look, Lois Lane stirring up more shit that Superman is going to have to save her from.

She sucks.

Lawrence Fishburne's character being a real dick in this movie, despite being pretty normal in MoS.

Jesse Eisenburg flirting with cougars again

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

The movie needs more symbolism and metaphors to beat you over the head with.

Jesse Eisenburg says a slightly cryptic line, then immediately describes what he meant, because us audience folk are too simple to understand a metaphor about heaven and hell.

Batman with another dream sequence resulting in my riotous laughter. At his parent's tomb, chocolate syrup is oozing from the tomb, then some alien monster bursts out of it.

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

I told you lol there like 2 hours before any fighting

I don't understand how they managed to make something so boring.

There isn't even tension being built, it's just "Hurry the f*** up and fight already"

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

How does Superman not know who Bruce Wayne is? He's a f***ing reporter.

Jesse Eisenburg is here to run his mouth and be annoying.

Gal Gadot looks at Batman with f*** me eyes.

Batman now snooping around this house he's in.

I wasn't paying attention, so I don't know whose house it is.

Jesse Eisenburg talking makes me wish I saw this in theaters so I could yell "you suck".

This is so much worse than Man of Steel

 

[John Price]

@Tarantula only a matter of time until OHL returns

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne having a conversation.

This has the potential to be an awesome scene, but it's just meh.

There's a movie that did this scene but way better, and I can't remember it.

I guess a paltry example is the ending of the first episode of The Shield, where Mackey and Aceveda lock eyes and your only reaction is like "Ooooooh boy, that'll be a good one".

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Then Jesse Eisenburg shows up, acts annoying, then shakes Superman's hand before commenting on his grip and saying "You should not fight this guy".

Oh my god, Zack Snyder, this movie f***ing suuuuuuuuuuucks

 

[Oogie Boogie]

@Tarantula only a matter of time until OHL returns

my friend

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

My review of BvS, just replace funny with entertaining

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Batman goes back to wandering around the house, so he can get his little spy thing back.

Superman following him close enough that it would be noticeable.

Then, Batman looks behind him to make sure the coast is clear, but doesn't see Superman.

That's some editing/reshoot nonsense right there

 

[John Price]

going downstairs to watch tv

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Superman travels all the way to South America in seconds, after seeing an emergency on the TV.

Good thing he knew exactly where to go, lol.

Talking heads on the TV trying to portray Superman as evil.

All this political shit is just cumbersome and boring. And a little too topical

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Superman calls his mom on the phone.

What, do you not want to see her in person?

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

2 more hours?

It took me nearly 2 hours just to watch the first hour, lirl

f*** this movie

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

Lawrence Fishburne's character: "Nobody cares about Clark Kent taking on the Bat Man."

 

[Tarantula]

It's a SAMSQUANCH RICKY

 

[Sega Dreamcast]

My takeaway from watching Man of Steel and one hour of Batman v Superman is that it is very unlikely ZSJL will be good.