OT: Relationship Advice Thread

[SnowblindNYR]

The losses ALWAYS suck worse & sting way longer than winning makes you feel good. It's not fair, it's just the way it is.

If you know all of this & you're still acting this intense, you've got other issues that you've been masking. You gotta find a good therapist. There's no shame in it.

I've been seeing a therapist over other shit but it's probably the bipolar which I got diagnosed with almost 15 years ago. I just don't know what I'll do with no sports.

 

[Boris Zubov]

I've been seeing a therapist over other shit but it's probably the bipolar which I got diagnosed with almost 15 years ago. I just don't know what I'll do with no sports.

What would you do with no wife? I know that's extreme, but it could be reality.

Find some other interests...learn how to cook, she would love that. Take a dance class with her, again she would love it. There's way more to life than sports...I'm sure you know this, but you need to go outside & get away from the TV if you know you can't control your temper.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

What would you do with no wife? I know that's extreme, but it could be reality.

Find some other interests...learn how to cook, she would love that. Take a dance class with her, again she would love it. There's way more to life than sports...I'm sure you know this, but you need to go outside & get away from the TV if you know you can't control your temper.

The thing is it's not just the games. It's this board. Every free moment is filled with this board. And it's great that I have a Hobbie and with the exception of a couple of people I like the people here but it's like fueling a cycle of me being obsessed with this team and feeling like I couldn't quit them.

 

[Brutananadilewski]

What would you do with no wife? I know that's extreme, but it could be reality.

Find some other interests...learn how to cook, she would love that. Take a dance class with her, again she would love it. There's way more to life than sports...I'm sure you know this, but you need to go outside & get away from the TV if you know you can't control your temper.

Probably not getting as many gray hairs, not having to check the nightstand for any sharp objects, not having to check the bed for foreign objects, not having to look from the corner of your eyes to see if she has a weapon.

 

[80s Kid]

I have known how f***ing asymmetrical Fandom is for 16 years. My biggest takeaway from the biggest upset win in Super Bowl history was that my life didn't change in any way. But yet if Tyree dropped that ball I would have been devastated. Sports is basically a drug addiction at this point.

That Super Bowl win was pretty awesome though. I still can't believe they went on that run and knocked Brady down a peg (and did it again 4 years later).

Would it help to just offer an apology for being animated during the games? You mentioned a language barrier so that could certainly complicate things but as long as you're being a good husband I would think that would still win the day.

 

[Boris Zubov]

The thing is it's not just the games. It's this board. Every free moment is filled with this board. And it's great that I have a Hobbie and with the exception of a couple of people I like the people here but it's like fueling a cycle of me being obsessed with this team and feeling like I couldn't quit them.

f*** this board. This board is even less important than the team. Think of Homer Simpson worrying about impressing the old drunks on the bar stools at Moe's. That's what this place is. Anonymous strangers on an internet message board mean NOTHING in the grand scheme.

 

[Brutananadilewski]

f*** this board. This board is even less important than the team. Think of Homer Simpson worrying about impressing the old drunks on the bar stools at Moe's. That's what this place is. Anonymous strangers on an internet message board mean NOTHING in the grand scheme.

HEY!!

WE RESEMBLE THAT!!

 

[Boris Zubov]

HEY!!

WE RESEMBLE THAT!!

I'm one of those drunks....

 

[Brutananadilewski]

I'm one of those drunks....

I'm the bar stool.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

That Super Bowl win was pretty awesome though. I still can't believe they went on that run and knocked Brady down a peg (and did it again 4 years later).

Would it help to just offer an apology for being animated during the games? You mentioned a language barrier so that could certainly complicate things but as long as you're being a good husband I would think that would still win the day.

First point: Yeah but I don't feel much different than if I were a Jets fan now. And I get annoying comments about at least my team won Super Bowls, yeah but they've also sucked for a dozen years.

Second point: Yeah, my wife told her I was ashamed and concerned and she seemed like it wasn't a problem.

But you know damage being done is a real thing. There are certain people that I have forgiven over some stuff but won't ever quite see the same way. And yeah I know in reality I didn't do anything terrible. Not like I hit my wife or something or cheated on her. But seeing a calm and seemingly nice guy fly off the handle may be jarring.

This is kind of weird but I watch so much true crime and internalize it. Often you see people living double lives or being two faced and I worry about that perception of me.

 

[DevilDog99]

Then you need to step away from watching. For all I post about how many of our guys suck and need to go (and to be clear, my trade list includes Shesty, Bread, Mika, Trochek, Trouba, Miller, Lindgren, Kreider and frankly, as good as he is, I don’t love Fox anymore so… I clearly am completely unhappy with the team) but my girl doesn’t even know that there’s drama in Rangers land and all she heard from me was “man, The Rangers suck” and then when I joined her after the game ended, I just said “we lost, again”. Pick a neutral team that plays an enjoyable brand of hockey or take a break. There isn’t a player on this team that is worth 1% of your relationship’s health.

I have the same trade list. Core is rotten- attitude problem in NYC!

Also, today I wish I was single

The thing is it's not just the games. It's this board. Every free moment is filled with this board. And it's great that I have a Hobbie and with the exception of a couple of people I like the people here but it's like fueling a cycle of me being obsessed with this team and feeling like I couldn't quit them.

Despite our differences… here for ya bud. Hit me up on pm if you ever want to grab a drink and chat.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

I have the same trade list. Core is rotten- attitude problem in NYC!

Also, today I wish I was single


Despite our differences… here for ya bud. Hit me up on pm if you ever want to grab a drink and chat.

Thank you!

 

[SnowblindNYR]

I have the same trade list. Core is rotten- attitude problem in NYC!

Also, today I wish I was single


Despite our differences… here for ya bud. Hit me up on pm if you ever want to grab a drink and chat.

Thank you!

 

[Boris Zubov]

Also, today I wish I was single

Ruh roh!

Holidays can bring out the worst stress....

 

[NickyFotiu]

Ruh roh!

Holidays can bring out the worst stress....

My dad used to say no politics or religion (discussion) to try to keep things nice.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

My dad used to say no politics or religion (discussion) to try to keep things nice.

I'm glad no one needs to say anything about there being no religion in my family gatherings.

 

[LokiDog]

Henry is on his way to Poland for 3 months this morning. Casts a pall over the holiday quite a bit today. While I’m very happy with my new relationship and excited that we’re expecting, she’s smack dab in the middle of vicious first trimester nausea so kinda kills the foodie holiday a bit as well. Still thankful. Hug your kids, your wives and your people and enjoy the day.

 

[I Eat Crow]

@SnowblindNYR , brother, sign out of here for a few weeks and take a break from watching this team if it's causing you to have literal fits of anger that are scaring your wife and in laws. Apologize to your in laws with a Google translate assist and explain that you get way too into hockey sometimes.

It's just not worth it. Pick up another hobby and redirect that energy towards your wife. Plan date nights with your wife instead of watching hockey for a bit. Keep going to therapy and ask them for help with regards to directing and expressing your anger.

I was you in my early 20's. It's alright to be excited and to be passionate and loud, but when you're launching TV remotes through the wall like I did over 10 years ago, that was the wake up call to dial it down.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

@SnowblindNYR , brother, sign out of here for a few weeks and take a break from watching this team if it's causing you to have literal fits of anger that are scaring your wife and in laws. Apologize to your in laws with a Google translate assist and explain that you get way too into hockey sometimes.

It's just not worth it. Pick up another hobby and redirect that energy towards your wife. Plan date nights with your wife instead of watching hockey for a bit. Keep going to therapy and ask them for help with regards to directing and expressing your anger.

I was you in my early 20's. It's alright to be excited and to be passionate and loud, but when you're launching TV remotes through the wall like I did over 10 years ago, that was the wake up call to dial it down.

Yeah I'm not watching anymore games while I'm here.

 

[TopShelfSnipes]

This team is legit going to ruin my relationship. Watching this last game and Watching blow the f***ing game and I didn't take it well and my mother in law and wife's cousin saw me flip out. I don't know how people can be die hard fans and have an actual relationship. Because it's f***ing hard to watch this team and be level headed but people that don't care about sports just think you're a lunatic. This f***ing team is f***ing toxic and I might need to stop watching them at some point because they're f***ing ruining my life.

As someone who's gotten his wife into hockey over the years, my advice for you is this:

Sarcasm over anger, every time.

Honestly, as a Rangers fan, you have to expect that this team is gonna find some stupid way to lose and it's never the way you think, and you have to go into every season expecting it not to be the year. And you have to kind of laugh and say "I knew that would happen" when they invariably blow it.

Being married is really great. I basically live with my best friend who I'm also sexually attracted to, we come home to each other every day, we have this incredible 2 acre property and 2500+ square foot house that's our own personal playground, neither one of us has to travel to see each other, and I get to fall asleep holding her every single night. The high of that basically beats any high from a hockey win, and when the team starts doing shitty, if you keep that perspective it makes it that much easier to shut the TV off in the 2nd period of a game like the other night and watch How I Met Your Mother reruns with her and just go spend other quality time together. The team will still be here the day after.

 

[Brutananadilewski]

My dad used to say no politics or religion (discussion) to try to keep things nice.

*Before the appetizers are served and after a few shots of Jim Beam*

THEY'RE ALL PART OF A CABAL OF SATANISTS!!

 

[NickyFotiu]

Thought twice about it lol.

 

[kovazub94]

As someone who's gotten his wife into hockey over the years, my advice for you is this:

Sarcasm over anger, every time.

Honestly, as a Rangers fan, you have to expect that this team is gonna find some stupid way to lose and it's never the way you think, and you have to go into every season expecting it not to be the year. And you have to kind of laugh and say "I knew that would happen" when they invariably blow it.

Being married is really great. I basically live with my best friend who I'm also sexually attracted to, we come home to each other every day, we have this incredible 2 acre property and 2500+ square foot house that's our own personal playground, neither one of us has to travel to see each other, and I get to fall asleep holding her every single night. The high of that basically beats any high from a hockey win, and when the team starts doing shitty, if you keep that perspective it makes it that much easier to shut the TV off in the 2nd period of a game like the other night and watch How I Met Your Mother reruns with her and just go spend other quality time together. The team will still be here the day after.

Amen!

 

[NickyFotiu]

As someone who's gotten his wife into hockey over the years, my advice for you is this:

Sarcasm over anger, every time.

Honestly, as a Rangers fan, you have to expect that this team is gonna find some stupid way to lose and it's never the way you think, and you have to go into every season expecting it not to be the year. And you have to kind of laugh and say "I knew that would happen" when they invariably blow it.

Being married is really great. I basically live with my best friend who I'm also sexually attracted to, we come home to each other every day, we have this incredible 2 acre property and 2500+ square foot house that's our own personal playground, neither one of us has to travel to see each other, and I get to fall asleep holding her every single night. The high of that basically beats any high from a hockey win, and when the team starts doing shitty, if you keep that perspective it makes it that much easier to shut the TV off in the 2nd period of a game like the other night and watch How I Met Your Mother reruns with her and just go spend other quality time together. The team will still be here the day after.

That sounds great. Im happy for you. What rea are you in? 2 acres sounds great.

 

[Machinehead]

I have known how f***ing asymmetrical Fandom is for 16 years. My biggest takeaway from the biggest upset win in Super Bowl history was that my life didn't change in any way. But yet if Tyree dropped that ball I would have been devastated. Sports is basically a drug addiction at this point.

See, I get as miserable as you with some of the bad stuff, but this is odd to me.

If you're going to be a sports fan, you really need to try to get more out of the success.

Let's just get this straight: nothing is going to change your life except maybe a lot of money.

You have to be content with your day to day, and the victories along the way make it a little bit sweeter.

The LIberty winning didn't make me not at work on a Tuesday, but the banner in my office says "2024 WNBA Champions" and every time somebody looks at it I'm like "that's right." This year I'm putting the official New York Liberty jingeball on the Christmas tree. I recently went to the Barclays Center with my dad for a college game. I looked up at the banners and stared at the empty spot for awhile, and man...that hit.

But I'm happy at my job, and celebrating Christmas, and doing things with my dad whether they won or not.

Same thing with a relationship. You can do things with somebody and that's great, but you need to do things you enjoy without somebody.

I feel like you try to make sports the main dish when it's really the sauce.