NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread - PHASE FOURTEEN! Part One!

BiggE

SELL THE DAMN TEAM
Jan 4, 2019
24,992
65,535
Somewhere, FL
So without further adieu the Las Vegas Desert Ducks would like to take you on a trip down memory lane but beware.... it won't be an enjoyable trip.

We go back to October 7th in the year of our lord and savior, 2011 to South Philadelphia where the Philadelphia Phillies were playing the St. Louis Cardinals in Game Five of the National League Division Series.

Now this is a Phillies team that in the last couple years won a World Series, lost a World Series, and lost in the NLCS but this team was the best of them all and it wasn't really close. This was THE team. The best team that I have seen in this city in my lifetime in all of the four major sports. This team was absolutely special and appointment television. They won a team record 102 games that season.

What wasn't to love when every night you could see one of the best pitchers in baseball perform? Roy Halladay, Cliff Lee, Cole Hamels, and Roy Oswalt. That wasn't it however, even when those perennial All-Stars weren't pitching they had a player like Vance Worley (11-3 3.01 ERA) that dazzled. This was a team that every single night you knew they could go out there and win.

Prior to the series Roy Halladay said “I didn’t come here to praise Caesar (The Cardinals), I came here to bury him.” That’s a quote that stuck with me for years. It was also in my signature for years on this site.

This series had went back and forth with the Phillies winning game one, the Cardinals took game two after Desert Ducks Team Rental Pickup Cliff Lee blew a four run lead, and the next two games were split but not without a few incidences with the Rally Squirrel. Yes, the Rally Squirrel. This squirrel first made it's appearance during game three in St. Louis but didn't really make it's presence known until the following game where it ran onto the field and across the plate as Roy Oswalt was throwing his pitch. The pitch was called a ball and the Phillies argued that it should not have been counted due to the distraction. That argument fell on deaf ears. That brought us to Game Five in Philadelphia where a squirrel bothered Oswalt in the outfield prior to the game. Spooky stuff going on here, right?

PHILLIES1-articleLarge.jpg


Now with this category we were giving the edict to pick one moment so that's what i'm officially going to do but i'm going to continue to tell the story beyond that as others have done up to this point.

So Game Five. The night where it all ended. The end of a Dynasty before it's time. The end of fun at Citizens Bank Park and really, the end of the Phillies. This game saw two long time friends and greats face off in what was going to be the pitching duel to end all pitching duels, Roy Halladay against Chris Carpenter.

So with that said my Team Crushing Sports Moment occurred when Rafael Furcal hit a lead off triple to open the game. It was at that moment that I knew it was all over. The Cardinals were going to knock that runner in whether it be a sac fly or whatever and the game would end 1-0 and there was nothing that any of us could do about it. While it wasn't a sac-fly Furcal was knocked home the next at bat by Skip Schumaker on a double making the score 1-0.

Halladay went on to scatter four hits over the next seven innings and he did not allow another run. He even was able to get out of a bases loaded jam in the Top of the 8th to allow the Phillies to still have a reasonable chance to win this game. He did his job like the horse that he was. The offense couldn't muster much of anything either. It was a slow painful death that I knew was coming. Chase Utley lead off the 9th. He swings at the first pitch and hits one deep to the warning track that still to this day if it was any other night I believe that was going to be a homer. It just wasn't meant to be. Hunter Pence grounded out next and that brought us to the final out.

Ryan Howard. The Big Piece. He would fight a few pitches off before inevitably grounding out to first base and yet as the camera panned to the 2nd basemen fielding the ball and throwing to first Howard was no where to be seen. We soon see Howard writhing in pain in foul territory from which we would soon find out was a torn achilles tendon.

ryanhowardjpg-07035211859282ff.jpg


We didn't know it yet but it was all over. That would be the last winning season and last playoff berth for the Phillies for now over a decade and it's still going.

The saddest part of all with this game was what we learned years later with Halladay. Roy had felt a pop in his back early in the game (1st or 2nd inning) and fought through the pain and pitched his gem but it would come at the ultimate cost. Halladay's wife, Brandy said this about him returning home that night

“When he came home, he was just in so much pain, and I remember watching him get up out of bed and…he sneezed. He fell onto the ground and was sitting on all fours, and he was in so much pain, he couldn’t get back up and he laid there for probably 10 to 15 minutes,”

This constant pain that would not go away lead Roy to begin taking opioids to lessen the pain that he was experiencing even doing the simplest things let alone doing such a violent act as pitching as a major league level. However, Roy continued to push and try to pitch the use of opioids turned into an addiction. He would go on to enter rehab a couple times and seemingly kicked the habit but once you're an addict you're an addict for life. As many of you know, Halladay would go on to die in a plane crash in November of 2017 with a cocktail of drugs in his system.

So in the end this game of games had a massive reach that was far further than what happened on the field itself. It was the definition of a Crushing Sports Moment. That shit sucked to type out.

giphy-downsized-large.gif


@Chuck Downie hit us with a twofer.
JFC, now I just want to cry
 
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Hollywood Cannon

I'm Away From My Desk
Jul 17, 2007
88,077
160,026
South Jersey
f***. This still hurts. Even more so after you connected the dots between Halladay's injury and his untimely death.

Yep, the loss was awful in the first place (still would have been my #1 pick) but as the years went by and events unfolded to hear that that night was the start of the end for Roy just makes it that much worse.

JFC, now I just want to cry

I cried writing it. I'm not too proud to say it.

Those Phillies teams and then Roy Halladay specifically had a massive influence on my life. Spending those summers at the ballpark with my family and friends are core memories for me.

Roy was THE guy. He was the guy that the team "needed" for years. How he wanted to come here because we were winners (or the Yankees). When the best pitcher (or player in other cases) in the world wants to come to your team it means something special. He was the epitome of an athlete focused on his craft. He was such a joy to watch. I was at the Perfect Game in Florida. I was at the No Hitter in Philly. It was amazing.

I remember exactly where I was on on November 7th, 2017. I was walking into the venue for my wedding to drop some things off and do a final walk through of what to expect (wedding was the 11th). As I got out of my car, I looked down at my phone and see "Plane Crashes In Florida. Fatality and possibly Roy Halladay" or something along those lines. One of those "wait, what?" moments in life.

I mean it when I say that watching this team and him specifically was appointment television for me. I'm not sure i've really had that since in any sport. I could say that the Eagles are but that's only because they play 17 games a year and it's just what we do in our family. Although, I will say that watching Justin Herbert probably is the closest thing i've gotten to since then. It being different with him as opposed to the Eagles as I have to actually search out his games.

If you guys don't want to cry more then don't read this article...

Inside Roy Halladay's struggle with pain, addiction

Or watch this: E60 Imperfect: The Roy Halladay Story Presented by Liberty Mutual | Watch ESPN
 

BiggE

SELL THE DAMN TEAM
Jan 4, 2019
24,992
65,535
Somewhere, FL
Yep, the loss was awful in the first place (still would have been my #1 pick) but as the years went by and events unfolded to hear that that night was the start of the end for Roy just makes it that much worse.



I cried writing it. I'm not too proud to say it.

Those Phillies teams and then Roy Halladay specifically had a massive influence on my life. Spending those summers at the ballpark with my family and friends are core memories for me.

Roy was THE guy. He was the guy that the team "needed" for years. How he wanted to come here because we were winners (or the Yankees). When the best pitcher (or player in other cases) in the world wants to come to your team it means something special. He was the epitome of an athlete focused on his craft. He was such a joy to watch. I was at the Perfect Game in Florida. I was at the No Hitter in Philly. It was amazing.

I remember exactly where I was on on November 7th, 2017. I was walking into the venue for my wedding to drop some things off and do a final walk through of what to expect (wedding was the 11th). As I got out of my car, I looked down at my phone and see "Plane Crashes In Florida. Fatality and possibly Roy Halladay" or something along those lines. One of those "wait, what?" moments in life.

I mean it when I say that watching this team and him specifically was appointment television for me. I'm not sure i've really had that since in any sport. I could say that the Eagles are but that's only because they play 17 games a year and it's just what we do in our family. Although, I will say that watching Justin Herbert probably is the closest thing i've gotten to since then. It being different with him as opposed to the Eagles as I have to actually search out his games.

If you guys don't want to cry more then don't read this article...

Inside Roy Halladay's struggle with pain, addiction

Or watch this: E60 Imperfect: The Roy Halladay Story Presented by Liberty Mutual | Watch ESPN
I’ll wait til after my gig, if I check this stuff out before, I’ll end up playing Tears in Heaven for an hour
 

Hollywood Cannon

I'm Away From My Desk
Jul 17, 2007
88,077
160,026
South Jersey
Well shit, picking at the top rears it's ugly head again. Too damn quick for me. Yeah, yeah, I probably should have been thinking doing that four year break in between my first and second pick but we don't need to get into semantics.

With so many great categories and the want to not rush any of those other categories we had to find the "weakest link" and that's Team Babe.

So with that said we're going to select as our Team Babe... Wendy Peffercorn

Sandlots_Wendy_Peffercorn_-_A_Timeless_Dime_1024x1024.png


giphy.gif


@Magua "this" being waiting for your pick. Wow us with your greatness.

 

DancingPanther

Foundational Titan
Jun 19, 2018
33,787
72,034
Doc is without a doubt my favorite Phillie ever and the best pitcher I've ever seen. I was torn between that game and the sixers. Went with the sixers because of how angry it made me
 
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Magua

Entirely Palatable Product
Apr 25, 2016
38,541
160,573
Huron of the Lakes
The Honolulu Ghibli select as our next Horseshit Team Musician........Sid Vicious (air bass).

original.gif


"This guy's a gangster? His real name's Simon Ritchie!" Derp Sidious, a band member who literally could not even play his instrument, will serve as a good counterpoint to Steve Vai and his tesseract-shaped guitars and feathery coif. I imagine they would despise each other to the point of extreme violence, and that's the type of band chemistry for which we are aiming!

Vicious technically played the bass for the Sex Pistols, except he had never played an instrument before joining the band. Their manager gave him the job because he "looked" and "acted" the part. Even if I wanted to showcase his awful playing, pickings would be slim. The Pistols only recorded 1 song with him on the bass on their only album, Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols. Their guitarist had to do Sid's bass lines for him because they were so rubbish and amateur. When performing live, his amp would regularly be unplugged.

This talentless turd is the Kardashian of punk rock. Possibly murdering his girlfriend, before overdosing himself, just adds to his rancid flavor.

*****

@ajgoal -- mmmhhmmmm
 

Hurricane28

Angry Flyers STH/Weather Guy
Aug 22, 2012
9,217
9,189
South Jersey
Not pick tipping because this guy is dead last in my lawyer rankings but did anyone have a worse lawyer than Cameron Poe in Con Air? I can’t think of one.

dude is defending his wife and gets prison time because he was in the military.

And it wasn’t even a light sentence. He served 8 years!
 
Last edited:
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CanadianFlyer88

Knublin' PPs
Feb 12, 2004
43,757
53,296
Van City
The Honolulu Ghibli select as our next Horseshit Team Musician........Sid Vicious (air bass).

original.gif


"This guy's a gangster? His real name's Simon Ritchie!" Derp Sidious, a band member who literally could not even play his instrument, will serve as a good counterpoint to Steve Vai and his tesseract-shaped guitars and feathery coif. I imagine they would despise each other to the point of extreme violence, and that's the type of band chemistry for which we are aiming!

Vicious technically played the bass for the Sex Pistols, except he had never played an instrument before joining the band. Their manager gave him the job because he "looked" and "acted" the part. Even if I wanted to showcase his awful playing, pickings would be slim. The Pistols only recorded 1 song with him on the bass on their only album, Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols. Their guitarist had to do Sid's bass lines for him because they were so rubbish and amateur. When performing live, his amp would regularly be unplugged.

This talentless turd is the Kardashian of punk rock. Possibly murdering his girlfriend, before overdosing himself, just adds to his rancid flavor.

*****

@ajgoal -- mmmhhmmmm
Rats.
 

Lord Defect

Secretary of Blowtorching
Nov 13, 2013
18,782
34,818
What does a Quackverse lawyer need to have a background in? The laws of Earth Prime are well and good -- some of them anyway -- but how much good would they serve in another dimension? See the problem with law is it's so factual. And I need someone whose expertise is in the fictional. What would happen in the Quackverse if "Chef" from South Park, while borrowing the Magic School Bus and in possession of a stolen team cactus, was charged with vehicular homicide against Chicken Judge Judy at a Firestick's outdoor game in Atlantis?

Exactly
.

The Honolulu Ghibli have acquired the pro bono services of our Team Lawyer: Harvey Birdman.

atty-hb.gif


Exhibits A, B, and C in defense of our attorney's abilities and expertise in the area of Megaverse Law:








We rest our case. We call to the stand to make his next selection: @Hollywood Couturier !

Oh f*** off that was my next pick. f***.
 

JojoTheWhale

(after my conversation with Torts)
May 22, 2008
35,567
110,177
I think my lawyer is safe. Yes, that was dumb to say out loud.

a37.png


What does a Quackverse lawyer need to have a background in? The laws of Earth Prime are well and good -- some of them anyway -- but how much good would they serve in another dimension? See the problem with law is it's so factual. And I need someone whose expertise is in the fictional. What would happen in the Quackverse if "Chef" from South Park, while borrowing the Magic School Bus and in possession of a stolen team cactus, was charged with vehicular homicide against Chicken Judge Judy at a Firestick's outdoor game in Atlantis?

Exactly
.

The Honolulu Ghibli have acquired the pro bono services of our Team Lawyer: Harvey Birdman.

atty-hb.gif


Exhibits A, B, and C in defense of our attorney's abilities and expertise in the area of Megaverse Law:








We rest our case. We call to the stand to make his next selection: @Hollywood Couturier !


Oh f*** off that was my next pick. f***.

There's a certain calmness in only having yourself to blame.
 

Beef Invictus

Revolutionary Positivity
Dec 21, 2009
130,156
170,500
Armored Train
The Honolulu Ghibli select as our next Horseshit Team Musician........Sid Vicious (air bass).

original.gif


"This guy's a gangster? His real name's Simon Ritchie!" Derp Sidious, a band member who literally could not even play his instrument, will serve as a good counterpoint to Steve Vai and his tesseract-shaped guitars and feathery coif. I imagine they would despise each other to the point of extreme violence, and that's the type of band chemistry for which we are aiming!

Vicious technically played the bass for the Sex Pistols, except he had never played an instrument before joining the band. Their manager gave him the job because he "looked" and "acted" the part. Even if I wanted to showcase his awful playing, pickings would be slim. The Pistols only recorded 1 song with him on the bass on their only album, Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols. Their guitarist had to do Sid's bass lines for him because they were so rubbish and amateur. When performing live, his amp would regularly be unplugged.

This talentless turd is the Kardashian of punk rock. Possibly murdering his girlfriend, before overdosing himself, just adds to his rancid flavor.

*****

@ajgoal -- mmmhhmmmm

Ahhhhhhh this guy rivals Flyers staff for undeserved recognition.


How the f*** did he get a movie made about him?
 

ajgoal

Almost always never serious
Jun 29, 2015
9,847
28,587
The themes of this phase are spite and pain. So let's throw some fuel on those fires, shall we?

dd7b3e6a-459a-4136-9632-5b87c6100efd_text.gif


The Crow might have been a perfect antihero movie. Michael Wincott is a class A antagonist, and Brandon Lee was perfect in the lead, as a man murdered with his fiancee on the eve of his wedding. He then comes back, exacting vengeance on the killers. Tragically, however, this would be Brandon Lee's final film.

So why recast it, you ask? Pure spite. While we are not spiteful people, harboring only slightly more spite than local saint @BernieParent, our disdain for this actor is white hot. His douchebaggery is well documented, and yet he still continues to find employment. And we'll admit that there seems almost a bit of karmic justice.

In the process, we save Brandon's life. Icing on the cake.

Movie Recast: Alec Baldwin as Eric (The Crow)

As an added bonus, [RANCH] was made four years earlier, so Alec would still be alive for that.

It's going to be an unequivocal piece of shit with Baldwin instead of Lee. But it's worth it to kill him off instead.
 
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Rebels57

HFBoards Sponsor
Sponsor
Sep 28, 2014
78,067
125,452
The themes of this phase are spite and pain. So let's throw some fuel on those fires, shall we?

dd7b3e6a-459a-4136-9632-5b87c6100efd_text.gif


The Crow might have been a perfect antihero movie. Michael Wincott is a class A antagonist, and Brandon Lee was perfect in the lead, as a man murdered with his fiancee on the eve of his wedding. He then comes back, exacting vengeance on the killers. Tragically, however, this would be Brandon Lee's final film.

So why recast it, you ask? Pure spite. While we are not spiteful people, harboring only slightly more spite than local saint @BernieParent, our disdain for this actor is white hot. His douchebaggery is well documented, and yet he still continues to find employment. And we'll admit that there seems almost a bit of karmic justice.

In the process, we save Brandon's life. Icing on the cake.

Movie Recast: Alec Baldwin as Eric (The Crow)

As an added bonus, [RANCH] was made four years earlier, so Alec would still be alive for that.

What the f***. I am triggered.
 
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Captain Dave Poulin

Imaginary Cat
Sponsor
Apr 30, 2015
68,576
201,323
Tokyo, JP
Listen to this stupid f***ing shit.



And this stupid f***ing shit.



But this is the worst. Listen to this stupid f***ing bullshit burnout noise.



I'll be honest, even with all my spite constantly regenerating and overflowing I probably would have been able to just ignore f***ing Floyd like I ignore all other bands who aren't worth a f***. But you know what happened instead? Every other motherf***er I knew tried to convince me to appreciate this shit. "Dude, you have to listen to 'Dark Side of My Balls' again, you just don't get it." F*** off. It's like they couldn't stand to get high without me, that's how irresistible my company is, I guess, based on the number of people who pulled the exact same shit. I never once bothered trying to convince people to listen to the shit I liked, so I'm not sure why they couldn't control themselves and take "F*** no" for an answer. I do know why they trolled me by playing this shit (and f***ing "Touch of F***ing Grey") on the jukebox when we went out - they were all shitheads. No wonder I always got so wasted.

When it comes to picking one of these c***s for the Spite Supergroup, I could have picked either of two, and I'm going to pick the one who actually bothered me second-most, for positional reasons.

tl;dr f*** Floyd.

fouyj7eR9BJAJ8RZJE6cTU.jpg


Team Member (literally) - Roger C***ing Waters - Bass, Gibberish, Clock Sounds, Coin Sounds, Burnout Daydreams, Lyrics, F*** Yourself
 

Rebels57

HFBoards Sponsor
Sponsor
Sep 28, 2014
78,067
125,452
Listen to this stupid f***ing shit.



And this stupid f***ing shit.



But this is the worst. Listen to this stupid f***ing bullshit burnout noise.



I'll be honest, even with all my spite constantly regenerating and overflowing I probably would have been able to just ignore f***ing Floyd like I ignore all other bands who aren't worth a f***. But you know what happened instead? Every other motherf***er I knew tried to convince me to appreciate this shit. "Dude, you have to listen to 'Dark Side of My Balls' again, you just don't get it." F*** off. It's like they couldn't stand to get high without me, that's how irresistible my company is, I guess, based on the number of people who pulled the exact same shit. I never once bothered trying to convince people to listen to the shit I liked, so I'm not sure why they couldn't control themselves and take "F*** no" for an answer. I do know why they trolled me by playing this shit (and f***ing "Touch of F***ing Grey") on the jukebox when we went out - they were all shitheads. No wonder I always got so wasted.

When it comes to picking one of these c***s for the Spite Supergroup, I could have picked either of two, and I'm going to pick the one who actually bothered me second-most, for positional reasons.

tl;dr f*** Floyd.

fouyj7eR9BJAJ8RZJE6cTU.jpg


Team Member (literally) - Roger C***ing Waters - Bass, Gibberish, Clock Sounds, Coin Sounds, Burnout Daydreams, Lyrics, F*** Yourself


What the f*** is happening in here lol
 

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