Welcome to The Flyers Board NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot, IT'S LATE, BUT IT'S GR8 TO START PHASE 28!
So, we got a little sidetracked. It’s not hard to do when the thing that originally brought us all together just keeps sinking with no bottom (but several asses) in sight. We are also seriously stressing the bounds of creativity. What is there left to pick? That is the thing we have to figure out. Unless we figure out the next stage after picking shit. I have given that an unhealthy amount of thought over the past several years, but as a group project, it is not particularly forthcoming
Anyway, the delay is no big deal. Now we are back and ready to roll again. And wait until you see these categories. You are going to shit. Well, not shit, probably not even pee, but maybe dribble a little.
THE HOCKEY SHIT
I can’t believe it has been long enough to have to do this again, but here we are. Pick five players who were eligible for the 2024 NHL Entry Draft.
* Futurehead
* Futurehead
* Futurehead
* Futurehead
* Futurehead
THE SEX TAPE
This is where we U-turn back into the boudoir. I know that you’re thinking I am going to say something like “Pick your favorite celebrity sex tape” or something similarly Sexpoey, but that’s not it at all. For one thing, I have never seen a celebrity sex tape, seriously – I wouldn’t know where to start. Secondly, it would be unbelievably boring and banal – we are working toward a higher purpose here. I don’t have time to explain what that is right now, so talk amongst yourselves.
Here is what we are doing. We are composing a mix tape of songs that you play when things are getting romantic and/or carnal, or when you want things to get romantic and/or carnal. There is no need to be embarrassed by this. Imagine you are taking your girlfriend to the airport because she has to go back to Sweden for six weeks, and you know she is going to see her ex, and there is nothing you can do about it, so you want to set up a tape to play for your last night in the car going out before she leaves. These are the songs on that tape. On the other hand, say it is the same situation, but [REDACTED TALK ABOUT HUMAN SEXUALITY THAT WENT ON WAY TOO LONG]. You could play the tape while all that is happening, too.
Here are the rules: the only rule is that you can’t choose a song that has been individually and specifically chosen before. That is it. If you want something by one of your Team Artists, it’s up to you to get it while you can. You will still own all their music until eternity – you just can’t put a song by them that was chosen by someone else on your sex tape. No big deal.
* Sex Tape Track One
* Sex Tape Track Two
* Sex Tape Track Three
* Sex Tape Track Four
* Sex Tape Track Five
THE RATIONAL SHIT
I know that not everyone is a fan of foreign films, but remember that part of the fun of this is in doing the research and finding things to like that we didn’t even know about before.
* Foreign Film – As usual, it can’t be a film that has been taken or a film by a Team Director. The Supplemental Directors Draft choices aren’t part of it – you can ignore those, as those only concern those of us with taste.
* Foreign Actor – It can’t be someone explicitly and individually and totally taken already and can’t be someone born in an English-speaking nation.
* Foreign Actress – The same as the above, but with a lady.
Remember: “Chaos” is not the same thing as “Havoc.” Engage in the former, not the latter. We have a whole ton of stuff left over for future phases, so don’t worry if categories you wanted aren’t in here - I will champion them later with the boss.
For the first round, we will give everyone 12 hours to get revved up again - for all the succeeding rounds, it will be six hours. The daily clock starts at 8 a.m. and ends at 10 p.m., all times Eastern. This is a MONGOOSE DRAFT, which is the same functionally as a snake draft, but isn’t named after the turboc*** of the animal world.
Don't forget to tag the next person in your pick post AND send a PM.
DRAFT ORDER
BiggE - Jacksonville Methgators
Magua - Honolulu Ghibli
Beef Invictus - D.C. Mutineers
Hollywood Couturier - Las Vegas Desert Ducks
BernieParent - Halifax Galleons
DancingPanther - Providence Platypi
ajgoal - Los Angeles Whalers
Lord Defect - St. Paul Stay Pufts
CanadianFlyer88 - Seattle Sockeyes
JojoTheWhale - New York M.A.D. Cats
BigToe - Stockholm Simps
GKJ - Philadelphia Villains
mja - New Jersey Flaming Zeppelins
Captain Dave Poulin - Quebec Lapins
Striiker - Allentown Attack
Rebels57 - Portland Fog
pit - Chicago Chimpanzees
Chuck Downie - Les Comiques de Saint-Louis-du-Ha!Ha!
Young Sandwich - Montreal Sexpos
DON’T FORGET TO STOCK UP FOR CHRISTMAS WITH QUACKVERSE MERCH AND/OR SWAG!
RIVALRIESBiggE - Jacksonville Methgators
Magua - Honolulu Ghibli
Beef Invictus - D.C. Mutineers
Hollywood Couturier - Las Vegas Desert Ducks
BernieParent - Halifax Galleons
DancingPanther - Providence Platypi
ajgoal - Los Angeles Whalers
Lord Defect - St. Paul Stay Pufts
CanadianFlyer88 - Seattle Sockeyes
JojoTheWhale - New York M.A.D. Cats
BigToe - Stockholm Simps
GKJ - Philadelphia Villains
mja - New Jersey Flaming Zeppelins
Captain Dave Poulin - Quebec Lapins
Striiker - Allentown Attack
Rebels57 - Portland Fog
pit - Chicago Chimpanzees
Chuck Downie - Les Comiques de Saint-Louis-du-Ha!Ha!
Young Sandwich - Montreal Sexpos
DON’T FORGET TO STOCK UP FOR CHRISTMAS WITH QUACKVERSE MERCH AND/OR SWAG!
| Allentown Attack | |
| Chicago Chimpanzees | |
| D.C. Mutineers | |
| Halifax Galleons | |
| Honolulu Ghibli | |
| Jacksonville Methgators | |
| Las Vegas Desert Ducks | |
| Les Comiques de Saint-Louis-du-Ha!Ha! | |
| Los Angeles Whalers | |
| Montreal Sexpos |
| New Jersey Flaming Zeppelins | |
| New York M.A.D. Cats | |
| Philadelphia Villains | |
| Portland Fog | |
| Providence Platypi | |
| Quebec Lapins | |
| Seattle Sockeyes | |
| St. Paul Stay Pufts | |
| Stockholm Simps |
NO NAMING NAMES, NO PICK TIPPING, NO ICE CREAM BANTER, NO TWITCH SHIT, SNITCHES GET STITCHES!
LEARN TO F***ING READ!
QUACKVERSE MEGADRAFT LEAGUE OFFICIAL MERCHANDISE
QUACKVERSE MEGADRAFT LEAGUE ON INSTAGRAM
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