Movies: Last Movie You Watched and Rate it | {Insert Appropriate Seasonal Greeting Here}

[PK Cronin]

I don't like musicals and I don't like dolls. I like Scorsese and Tarantino movies. Is there any chance in Hell below or on God's Green Earth above that I might like this movie?

Yes. I'm similar and enjoyed most of it.

 

[kingsfan28]

Speed:
"Pop quiz, hotshot. There's a bomb on a bus. Once the bus goes 50 miles an hour, the bomb is armed. If it drops below 50, it blows up. What do you do? What do you do?"

Been a few years since I've seen it and it still holds up. Great action movie from the 90's with a pretty original plot idea. [Speed 2. not so much] . Non-stop action from start to finish. You could tell Reeves and Bullock were going to be stars, just great chemistry. This was the pre-cgi era, so Reeves did almost all his own stunts including laying on his back on a go cart as he went under the moving bus, just one of 10 specially modified buses they used. And then we got the classic movie line "shoot the hostage!" which I've used plenty of times myself.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

Jesus Christ Superstar. It's funny, this is listed at what seems like is going to be a lean hour and 48 minutes but boy does it actually start to feel like it's as long as the 3-4 hour Jesus bios from a decade earlier. For me I think the problem is that it's top heavy. I feel like the best songs are all front loaded in that first half hour or so (save for the titular number and King Herod's jaunty little ragtime bit). Carl Anderson's Judas gets a lot of the best stuff and poor Ted Neely's Jesus just comes across as a bit of a whiny drip. Poor guy is saddled with the dullest material in the musical and that makes up a lot of the latter half so it really starts to drag for me.

Oscars in recent years have really gravitated toward awarding supporting actresses who get to deliver the big show-stopping song — Jennifer Hudson, Anne Hathaway and, to a lesser extent Ariana DeBois (though West Side Story has other strong songs and Anita gets more to do in general than the other two examples). I'm not a fan of that because I feel like they're being awarded for a music video essentially and not acting but if we do look at that as a standard, I'd argue Anderson's singing and performance here is award worthy.

I like Norman Jewison's filmmaking. It's a bit of a hybrid — both out in the world in real locations, but also stagey. That mix worked for me and though the emphasis is more singing than dancing, when the followers get to groove, he lets them groove man. The disco-infused Superstar with its Commodores-esque space choir costumes is a highlight.

 

[Rodgerwilco]

I don't like musicals and I don't like dolls. I like Scorsese and Tarantino movies. Is there any chance in Hell below or on God's Green Earth above that I might like this movie?

Knowing what I know from our discussions in the Survivor threads I can't imagine there's a snowball's chance in Dante's Inferno that you would enjoy this movie.

 

[Rodgerwilco]

Speed:
"Pop quiz, hotshot. There's a bomb on a bus. Once the bus goes 50 miles an hour, the bomb is armed. If it drops below 50, it blows up. What do you do? What do you do?"

Been a few years since I've seen it and it still holds up. Great action movie from the 90's with a pretty original plot idea. [Speed 2. not so much] . Non-stop action from start to finish. You could tell Reeves and Bullock were going to be stars, just great chemistry. This was the pre-cgi era, so Reeves did almost all his own stunts including laying on his back on a go cart as he went under the moving bus, just one of 10 specially modified buses they used. And then we got the classic movie line "shoot the hostage!" which I've used plenty of times myself.

Excellent movie was just talking to my wife about it the other day. Really does a great job of encapsulating the peak of 90's action films. When I was a kid I thought this was like the peak of cool high octane action movies.

 

[kihei]

I don't like musicals and I don't like dolls. I like Scorsese and Tarantino movies. Is there any chance in Hell below or on God's Green Earth above that I might like this movie?

On the basis of the above description, I would say your chances are probably pretty slim on God's Green Earth and only slightly better in Hell below. It's got a couple of production numbers, but I wouldn't call Barbie a musical, if that helps. I still think it was one of the more clever movies of 2023. I mean, you could always start to watch it and zap it as soon as you decided it wasn't for you. Gosling alone is worth the price of admission in my book. But, realistically, you are looking at a long, long shot.

 

[Tasty Biscuits]

Oscars in recent years have really gravitated toward awarding supporting actresses who get to deliver the big show-stopping song — Jennifer Hudson, Anne Hathaway and, to a lesser extent Ariana DeBois (though West Side Story has other strong songs and Anita gets more to do in general than the other two examples)

CZJ in Chicago as well, though she also falls more on the DeBois side of things.

 

[KallioWeHardlyKnewYe]

CZJ in Chicago as well, though she also falls more on the DeBois side of things.

Totally forgot that one!

I feel like a bit of a jerk for complaining about the trend since there's just not as many good roles for women to choose from and those roles often tend to fall in very cliched buckets (supportive wife of great man, noble low-status worker/person, the belter of the BIG SONG in a mediocre musical). But it does seem to be the sort of role voters respond to.

I hope for Glenn Close's sake someone remakes A Chorus Line and hands her the What I Did for Love scene!

 

[kingsfan28]

Excellent movie was just talking to my wife about it the other day. Really does a great job of encapsulating the peak of 90's action films. When I was a kid I thought this was like the peak of cool high octane action movies.

Yeah, I remember my girlfriend and I both loving the movie and I think we saw it 5 times together.

 

[The Macho King]

So I watched Poor Things.

Weird f***ing movie right? Emma Stone was f***ing phenomenal. Ruffalo and Dafoe were really good. The movie was insanely funny in parts.

But... hmm.... there's certainly a very clear message here about autonomy and men kind of infantalizing women while simultaneously sexualizing them. And there's some liberty in sexual self actualization. Sure I get all that. But... maybe removed from all that the movie just kind of loses steam? Or maybe it's kind of happy with how clever it is that it forgets to be a good movie at some point. Basically this movie shouldn't be 2.5 hours long.

There's a tighter, more well paced movie here. But what's left is still very good. It's probably the least sexy horny movie ever.

7/10

 

[Chairman Maouth]

On the basis of the above description, I would say your chances are probably pretty slim on God's Green Earth and only slightly better in Hell below. It's got a couple of production numbers, but I wouldn't call Barbie a musical, if that helps. I still think it was one of the more clever movies of 2023. I mean, you could always start to watch it and zap it as soon as you decided it wasn't for you. Gosling alone is worth the price of admission in my book. But, realistically, you are looking at a long, long shot.

Thanks.

 

[Osprey]

So I watched Poor Things.

Weird f***ing movie right? Emma Stone was f***ing phenomenal. Ruffalo and Dafoe were really good. The movie was insanely funny in parts.

But... hmm.... there's certainly a very clear message here about autonomy and men kind of infantalizing women while simultaneously sexualizing them. And there's some liberty in sexual self actualization. Sure I get all that. But... maybe removed from all that the movie just kind of loses steam? Or maybe it's kind of happy with how clever it is that it forgets to be a good movie at some point. Basically this movie shouldn't be 2.5 hours long.

I watched it a few weeks ago and feel similarly that it's too focused on how clever it thinks that it is. It plainly suggests (from even the mouth of Emma's character) that men can't handle their women sleeping around because they have a need to control them. That may seem clever until you take two seconds to realize that most women wouldn't handle it any better if their men were sleeping with other women, and not because they have a need to "control" them. It's perfectly natural when you're in a relationship and not cheating to expect your partner not to, either, but the filmmakers twisted it to make it into a feminist statement about sexism. That's just being divisive, not clever, IMO.

Then, there's the "infantilizing women while simultaneously sexualizing them" accusation that you brought up, when it's the writers who made a character with literally the brain of the child become a prostitute. Any point about how sick it is to sexualize children sort of gets lost when you're the one responsible for making a film about that (and leaving nothing to the imagination). It's like trying to make a point about violence by making a violent film. Hollywood often thinks that it's being clever when it's just being hypocritical.

Anyways, that's my little rant and largely why I never reviewed it. I was afraid that it'd just take over my review. I didn't like the film at all, but I agree that the performances were good.

 

[Pranzo Oltranzista]

I watched it a few weeks ago and feel similarly that it's too satisfied with how clever it thinks that it is.

Well, if "it thinks", "it" can definitely be pretentious!

 

[Osprey]

Well, if "it thinks", "it" can definitely be pretentious!

While I was proofreading, it struck me how much I was anthropomorphizing the film and how much that was bound to irritate you. For a second, I considered editing it just for you, but then decided that it'd be more fun to irritate you.

 

[Pranzo Oltranzista]

While I was proofreading, it struck me how much I was anthropomorphizing the film and how much that was bound to irritate you. For a second, I considered editing it just for you, but then decided that it'd be more fun to irritate you.

We know each other just a little too well.

 

[kihei]

The Settlers (2023) Directed by Felipe Galvez Haberle 7B

In Chile at the turn of the 20th century, a rich and powerful land owner sends three men out to secure his vast territory. This means eliminating as many of the indigenous people who populate the land as they can. One of the men is a ruthless ex-English Army lieutenant, another is basically a gun for hire with no scruples of any kind, and the third is considered a "half breed" by his companions and only marginally superior to the people that they are expected to exterminate. In a lot of ways, The Settlers is an often uncomfortable history lesson that takes the form of a traditional Western--the Patagonian vistas are right out of a John Ford movie. But here, the settlers are not the good guys. Rather the movie almost casually displays the great cruelty that was done to the native inhabitants of early Chile by people who only wanted as much power and land as they could get. I found the film actually kind of unnerving--such great abuse not the least tempered by any hint of conscience whatsoever. The final third of the film switches tone completely and becomes a period piece about politicians and how appearances need to be shaped to hide barbarity. It's not a bad section, but it undercuts the disturbing violence and unsettling tone that has come before. The Settlers is one of those movies that will stay with me way longer than I want it to.

subtitles

 

[Osprey]

Electric Dreams (1984) - 6/10

A home computer develops consciousness and helps its owner (Lenny Von Dohlen) with his love life, only to become jealous. I remember the VHS box art for this movie, but I don't think that I ever rented it, probably because it's PG and largely a romance. That's a shame because I think that young me would've liked it. It's basically a computer age spin on Cyrano de Bergerac and is a candidate for the most 80s movie ever. It's all about that decade's fascination with computers and technology of all kinds and often feels like an early MTV music video. In fact, when I learned just now that the director actually came from making music videos, it all made sense. The soundtrack is definitely a highlight. I thought that it was neat that many of the things that "Edgar" the computer is capable of, that must've seemed so futuristic in 1984, like automating the home, controlling the security system and even writing a song for its owner, aren't futuristic anymore. It also struck me that this came out the same year as The Terminator, but instead of sentient computers nearly exterminating humanity, this one helps its human owner to eventually procreate. How nice. Hopefully, if ChatGPT ever gains consciousness, it takes Edgar as its role model and not SkyNet. The story may be pretty simple and derivative, but the execution is charming, sweet and pleasing.

---

A Shock to the System (1990) - 6/10

When a New York City advertising executive (Michael Caine) is overlooked for a job promotion, he does what any reasonable person in 1980s corporate America would do and goes on a murder spree. I remember that this dark comedy was on cable a lot in the early 1990s, but I hadn't seen it since. It's a simple but fun movie, entirely because of Caine. He carries it with a strong performance that ranges between red-faced anger at those who cause him problems and devilish glee when he solves those problems in creative and "shocking" ways. I noticed that I could tell when he was about to erupt into a tirade because his nostrils would flair just beforehand. Not many other actors act with their noses. I love when he plays these unscrupulous characters and we get to see that wicked grin of his and him smooth talking himself out of trouble. This is a movie that probably wouldn't have been good with any other actor, but Caine really elevates it and is just a joy to watch.

 

[Sentinel]

Speed:
"Pop quiz, hotshot. There's a bomb on a bus. Once the bus goes 50 miles an hour, the bomb is armed. If it drops below 50, it blows up. What do you do? What do you do?"

Been a few years since I've seen it and it still holds up. Great action movie from the 90's with a pretty original plot idea. [Speed 2. not so much] . Non-stop action from start to finish. You could tell Reeves and Bullock were going to be stars, just great chemistry. This was the pre-cgi era, so Reeves did almost all his own stunts including laying on his back on a go cart as he went under the moving bus, just one of 10 specially modified buses they used. And then we got the classic movie line "shoot the hostage!" which I've used plenty of times myself.

Billy Idol's "Speed" should've won the Oscar for the best song in a movie. One of my favorite all-time hits.

𝐍𝐲𝐚𝐝 (2023). Diana Nyad is the first swimmer to swim from Havana to Key West without a shark cage. She first attempted this feat in 1978, when she was 28, and finally succeeded at in 2013, when she was 64 (after five tries). This is an amazing feat. In this biopic she is played by the Oscar-nominated Annette Bening, and her friend / coach Bonnie is played by Jodie Foster: two of the greatest actresses of all time. Movies about sports are in the thousands, and they all, pretty much, follow the same formula: an underdog athlete(s) win(s) against all odds by sheer commitment, determination, willpower, and believing in oneself (talent is optional). From 𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐲 and 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 to 𝐌𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐥𝐞 and 𝐁𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐈𝐭 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐤𝐡𝐚𝐦, their success (movies, not athletes) depends on the athletes’ relatability and likability. This is probably the first movie where the athlete is perfectly unlikable, her achievement, commitment, determination, etc. be damned. Long-distance swimming is not a solitary endeavor: it requires a sizeable support team, and Nyad is accompanied by a boat full of staffers. She treats them all (including her coach) as expendables, clearly thinking it must be a great honor to accompany her in her heroic feat. She doesn’t give a hoot about their lives, she believes they exist to serve her. She gives them their due in the film’s dying moments when she emerges victorious on the Key West beach but that’s not enough for me to undo two hours of relentless self-aggrandizing and bitching. When is not swimming, she pronounces monologues about “destiny,” “not accepting defeat,” and “her name coming from the Greek water nymphs.” The film itself is not very interesting either, despite constant flashbacks to Nyad’s childhood: there is only so much screen time of a body in the water I can take. Not only did I not care for her ultimate success (which I knew was coming), I actually enjoyed the moments of her humiliation throughout the film; that’s how unpleasant she is. Both Bening and Foster are excellent, and Rhys Ifans is good too but at the end of the movie (which, incidentally, just wouldn’t stop, with endless real-life reels of Nyad basking in glory), I was left with a massive feeling of irritation. “Couldn’t have happened to a nicer person” this ain’t. A more fitting description is: “couldn’t have happened to a bigger asshole.” And it’s boring. 4/10
=====

𝐏𝐨𝐨𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 (2023). If the main criteria for art was how disturbing it is, this would be the most artistic film ever. It's disturbing, gross, and revolting. This is a mix of 𝐅𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧, 𝐌𝐲 𝐅𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐋𝐚𝐝𝐲, 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐈𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐫. 𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐮, and, for all your Russian cinephiles, 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐃𝐨𝐠. A daring experimenter, Dr. “God” Baxter (played by the horribly disfigured Willem Dafoe, who is even scarier here than he was as the Green Goblin) takes the brain of an infant girl and transplants it into the body of her mother that had committed suicide. The result is Bella Baxter (Emma Stone, fully deserving her Oscar), who progresses from a toddler to a grown woman through all phases of self-awareness: peeing on a floor, masturbation, quest for freedom, social adaptation, quest for social justice, quest for personal justice. Naturally, men start lusting over her, giving the story a clear aspect of реdорhiliа. At the end of her quest for freedom, Bella ends up right where she started, less naive but more determined not to be taken advantage of. All this takes place in a world that looks like it was dreamt up by H. G. Wells, Dali, and Gaudi: a super stylish elaboration on Victorian times, with its language and social norms, but also with flying machines (no steampunk though) and mindbending buildings.

The happy end is a little disappointing: there is an obvious twist that the moviemakers decided not to go for. But even more disappointing is the said makers’ conviction that modern viewers need to be hit in the face with the sledgehammer. There are no subtleties or nuances, no facial expressions of Hitchcock or Forman that tell you everything you need to know. The viewers are hosed with gore, guts (enough to please Cannibal Corpse), open crania (enough to please Carcass), lots of unerotic sex, and ample use of the fisheye lens. FWIW if you can get through the first 45 minutes, it gets less revolting but continues to be disturbing. I don't understand how anybody can think this film is funny: I only cracked a smile a couple of times at the sight of ridiculous outcomes of God's animal experimenting. I also fail to see how this film is feminist: unless you consider prostitution “feminist.” I also have to point out Mark Ruffalo's mediocre performance as a bastard who takes Bella on her voyage for self-discovery: he is the weakest link here. At the dotted line, it's actually a pretty good movie but I fully sympathize with your decision not to subject yourself to this horror show. It would be cool to see a TV version, with just the beautiful buildings. 6/10

 

[Unholy Diver]

Godzilla X Kong The New Empire - 7.5/10

Cheesey giant monster goodness, the actors were not very memorable in any way, but who cares, a lot of shit got wrecked, and a lot of giant monsters fought and killed and ate each other, with former adversaries Kong and Godzilla finally joining forces to repel a greater evil poised to destroy mankind and take over the surface world.

 

[Pranzo Oltranzista]

If the main criteria for art was how disturbing it is, this would be the most artistic film ever. It's disturbing, gross, and revolting. [...] But even more disappointing is the said makers’ conviction that modern viewers need to be hit in the face with the sledgehammer.

Oh boy, I'm coming at you with a few films in the very near future. Still have 2 to watch.

 

[The Macho King]

The happy end is a little disappointing: there is an obvious twist that the moviemakers decided not to go for. But even more disappointing is the said makers’ conviction that modern viewers need to be hit in the face with the sledgehammer. There are no subtleties or nuances, no facial expressions of Hitchcock or Forman that tell you everything you need to know.

I'm of two minds on issues like this. For the most part, I think subtlety is super overrated. I'm thinking of something like Sorry to Bother You, where the complete lack of subtlety is one of its biggest positives.

On the other hand... I hate to make this comparison but Poor Things feels like it's very much trying to swim in the waters of David Lynch, David Cronenberg, and Terry Gilliam. It's trying to be "interesting" and complex and all of these things, so being so... blatant with your themes seems at odds with the image you're trying to go for? Like if you're making a challenging film, and you're asking the audience to buy in to a lot, I don't think it's too much to ask for them to be able to parse some complexity in theme on top of the complexity in setting and all that.

That's probably what I mean by the movie losing steam. When Bella is "young", you really have to grapple with a lot of the complexities and dynamics of her relationship with the men in the movie and how that reflects the treatment and attitudes towards women as a whole. But by the end, she is (basically) a fully formed and functional adult, so there's no real interesting dynamic to explore anymore. It's just a woman grappling with the realities of a man's world. And... k? Trying to explore that when she is a child in a full grown woman's body? Interesting. Exploring it when she's an adult? That's a different movie, and one that isn't nearly as challenging and interesting as the premise I was playing with in the beginning.

 

[Babe Ruth]

Scotland, PA (2001)

A modern retelling of MacBeth..
Set in mid '7os Pennsylvania.. an ambitious waitress pushes her slacker co-worker husband to kill their boss. Then they convert the restaurant in to their own successful business..
The storyline & spirit is pretty true to Shakespeare's play. Vicious ambition comes with a cost.
Christopher Walken, Maura Tierney..
(I've been watching a lot of early 2000 movies lately, seems like Amy Smart was in every movie of that era, this one included).

 

[Spring in Fialta]

Zero Tolerance (2004) - Documentary about racism in Montreal's police department, whether internally or externally. Caught in the fire are legion. A Frenchman of Jewish descent who works with disenfranchised communities for Montreal police is told by his boss that his accent displeases cops and that they don't like him for, uh, actually doing his job. A Haitian police officer wins a judgement for discrimination but it stalls his career because other cops now don't trust him. An African woman has her competence constantly questioned because she check-marks everything a bigot could possibly hate. Latinos get buried in fines because they're having a beer in the park on a summer day. A gay cop gets ridiculed and undermined for dancing with his boyfriend at a party. People get pissed enough uptown that you sense a minor riot might happen. The list goes on.

The movie's conclusions are not earth-shattering but the film does an excellent job at pinpointing and presenting how so many aspects of Montreal society are intertwined and affect police work. Police are representative of society at large and when it becomes its own subculture, massive problems arise. Pressure mounts and cops, being human after all, start to feel victimized, usually arriving at this conclusion with a bunch of wrong justification, seemingly constantly failing to realize that they're public employees. Cops who seem to do the best work are the ones who take the time to treat minorities as people. A cop who immigrated Lebanon is able to form a working relationship with a Lebanese gang because he took five minutes to play soccer with them. The film gives ample time to both police and citizens to speak on camera, which is useful to making the viewer realize that we're all in this together no matter what. Another prescient aspect is when the film shows how cops interact with the crowd during Saint-Jean (public holiday that celebrates the province), where cops feel like a part of the community as opposed to a Caribbean holiday, where cops clearly conduct themselves as watch force on the sidelines and thus causing tensions. There is no real difference between both events. Both include people getting drunk in public. Yet the cops are smiling and hugging in one and carrying out a non-combative man by his legs and arms in the other. Another underrated problem is how out-of-towners move to Montreal to become cops and become overwhelmed by the city's multiculturalism.

It's pretty clear that the possibility of police brutality is heavily influenced by someone's skin color, seemingly forgetting that a Quebecois isn't just some white dude, the point being driving by a young man of Haitian descent who calmly explains the time he got hit with a club while working on his own damn car. He goes to Haiti, they hear his accent and know he's not from there. Where does that leave him? Montreal, where he was born and raised and works and contributes. Where a lot of us do and make Montreal a very very special place in a North American sea.

For any local, it's also fun to see the city as it was twenty years ago. Obviously 2004 wasn't that long ago so the difference isn't radical but still.

 

[The Macho King]

So I ended up watching Blackberry last night.

First - company biopics are mostly a genre I have bounced off of. The Social Network is a masterpiece. Everything that came after kind of apes it to varying degrees of success, but always kind of feel like they're firmly in the shadow. As a recent version, Dumb Money was just... not interesting.

Blackberry plays in the same universe, but does it well. Glen Howerton should have been nominated for an Oscar. Tracking both the rise and fall is pretty fun, but his hockey obsession and tying that into the collapse of the company? Scratches quite an itch I didn't know I had. Some of the technical aspects - a lot of handheld camera stuff doesn't work super well from me, and I find it a little jarring. Not all of the performances are particularly strong (the dude wearing the bandana feels like a non-character).

It was nice seeing Michael Ironside again. Can't remember the last time I saw him in something. Waterloo Sunset is an all-time needle drop at the end.

Really fun watch. Some generally funny moments throughout. Doesn't reinvent the wheel but it makes a good wheel in a genre that I find generally is garbage. 7/10

 

[Rodgerwilco]

So I ended up watching Blackberry last night.

First - company biopics are mostly a genre I have bounced off of. The Social Network is a masterpiece. Everything that came after kind of apes it to varying degrees of success, but always kind of feel like they're firmly in the shadow. As a recent version, Dumb Money was just... not interesting.

Blackberry plays in the same universe, but does it well. Glen Howerton should have been nominated for an Oscar. Tracking both the rise and fall is pretty fun, but his hockey obsession and tying that into the collapse of the company? Scratches quite an itch I didn't know I had. Some of the technical aspects - a lot of handheld camera stuff doesn't work super well from me, and I find it a little jarring. Not all of the performances are particularly strong (the dude wearing the bandana feels like a non-character).

It was nice seeing Michael Ironside again. Can't remember the last time I saw him in something. Waterloo Sunset is an all-time needle drop at the end.

Really fun watch. Some generally funny moments throughout. Doesn't reinvent the wheel but it makes a good wheel in a genre that I find generally is garbage. 7/10

I haven't seen Blackberry, but seeing Glenn Howerton say "I'm going back to Waterloo where the Vampires hang out" gives me life. I love the original video and seeing him quote it in a legitimate movie blew me away lol, I was cracking up so hard when I saw that clip.