mfw I am reading an article on social anxiety and they perfectly describe me:
Khazan: How do you know if your level of social anxiety is considered disordered?
Hofmann: The definition of a mental disorder is that it causes either significant distress, and/or significant interference in one's life. So you might be able to perform normally during daily life, but you're terribly distressed around these social situations, such as meeting people, giving speeches, or doing things in front of people. It causes you such a level of distress that causes you to want to get help.
Or, there are people who kind of find their way around these problems, and they live lives that are fairly isolated. They might not marry, they might have very few friends, they might not go out for parties. In other words, they might not feel much distress because they’re living isolated lives, but at the same time they would like to be social. So they feel still an urgency to do something about it because they're not loners, but they just can't be around people because it's so distressing. Some people use substances like alcohol to medicate themselves.