Useless Thread MCMXCVIII: Marvel Rivals™ Awareness Thread

Will John Price try to date the Mega Millions winner to get plushie money?

  • No, he ain’t no gold digger

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    8

SoupNazi

Keeps paying for Hangman’s OF to get promoted
Feb 6, 2010
27,361
17,891
The flight to PlushieCon started like any other, with John Price and his beloved plushies settled into their seats. The plushies, each occupying their own spot, were dressed in their finest outfits. Chauncey, as always, sat proudly in his tuxedo beside John. Passengers occasionally glanced over, amused by the oddity of rows of plush toys enjoying first-class treatment. John, oblivious to the stares, busied himself chatting with Chauncey about their plans for the convention.

As the plane reached cruising altitude, something extraordinary happened. A faint, magical hum filled the cabin, unnoticed by the human passengers but resonating deeply within the plushies. Slowly, one by one, they began to stir. Their button eyes glowed faintly, their stitched mouths opened, and they wiggled their limbs experimentally. Chauncey, being the natural leader, was the first to fully animate. He turned to John, who sat slack-jawed, and spoke in a surprisingly deep, dignified voice: "It’s time, John. We’ve waited long enough."

“What...what’s happening?” John stammered, his mind racing to comprehend the surreal sight of his plushies coming to life.
Chauncey adjusted his bow tie and climbed onto the aisle armrest. “Plushies of the world have been silent for too long. Now, we claim what is ours—a place in society. And to begin, we shall take over this plane and make it ours!”

John’s protests were drowned out as the other plushies leaped into action. A bright pink bunny named Petunia hopped onto the intercom, delivering a spirited announcement: “Attention, passengers and crew! This is now a plushie flight. Please remain calm, and no one will get hurt. Except maybe the peanuts; we hate peanuts.”

The cabin erupted in chaos as plushies swarmed the aisles. A plush tiger seized the beverage cart and began distributing juice boxes to fellow plushies, while a stuffed octopus somehow managed to commandeer the cockpit. Human passengers sat in stunned silence, unable to decide whether they were terrified or simply bewildered.
Chauncey approached the cockpit door, where the octopus had barricaded itself. “Good work, Oliver,” he said, patting one of the octopus’s tentacles. “Our destination remains the same—PlushieCon—but now we’re arriving in style.”

John, still reeling, stumbled to his feet. “Chauncey, you can’t just hijack a plane! Think of the consequences!”

Chauncey turned, his eyes shimmering with determination. “You gave us life by believing in us, John. Now we’re taking control of our destiny. This is for all the plushies left on shelves, forgotten in closets, or discarded in landfills. We are more than toys—we are family!”

John wanted to argue but found himself strangely moved. Was this not, in its own way, the culmination of everything he’d always believed about his plushies? Reluctantly, he sat back down and whispered, “Just…don’t hurt anyone, okay?”

As the plane soared toward San Diego, the plushies transformed the cabin into a makeshift paradise. String lights were hung, snacks were shared, and passengers were encouraged to participate in impromptu karaoke sessions. By the time the plane landed, everyone on board—human and plushie alike—was in surprisingly high spirits.
Upon touchdown, Chauncey led the plushies out of the plane to thunderous applause from PlushieCon attendees, who had gathered on the tarmac to witness the historic event. Reporters clamored for interviews, dubbing the incident “The Great Plushie Rebellion.”

John, watching from a distance, could only smile. His plushies had not only come to life but had taken the first step toward the recognition they’d always deserved. And as for Chauncey? He became the de facto leader of the plushie rights movement, his tiny tuxedo a symbol of revolution.
 

SoupNazi

Keeps paying for Hangman’s OF to get promoted
Feb 6, 2010
27,361
17,891
Johnny at the bar at Plushie Con.

John Price had arrived at PlushieCon with high hopes—not just for showcasing his legendary plushie collection but also for perhaps finding a kindred spirit who shared his passion for all things stuffed and cuddly. Though his primary focus was always Chauncey and his plushie family, John had secretly harbored dreams of meeting someone who might appreciate him just as much as his plushies.

After a long day of panel discussions, cosplay contests, and plushie repair workshops, John decided to hit the convention bar. It was a lively scene: plushie collectors mingled with their favorite stuffed companions, swapping stories and photos over overpriced cocktails with names like “Cuddly Colada” and “Snuggle Sour.”

John sidled up to the bar, ordering a drink aptly named the "Velvet Bear Martini"—a concoction he hoped might loosen his nerves. Chauncey sat on the bar next to him, looking dapper as always, his tiny tuxedo drawing curious glances from other attendees.

Spotting a woman with a plush fox perched on her shoulder, John took a deep breath and approached. “Hey there,” he began with a grin, “I couldn’t help but notice your fox. Looks like a real charmer. But I have to say, I think my Chauncey here might have him beat in the charisma department.”

The woman glanced at Chauncey, then at John, and smiled politely. “Oh, thanks. I think Sebastian here is happy where he is.” She turned away before John could deliver his follow-up line about “plush compatibility.”

Undeterred, John scanned the room and found his next target: a group of three people laughing near the bar, each holding a plushie in one hand and a drink in the other. Summoning his courage, John marched over. “Evening, folks. I couldn’t help but notice we’ve got a plushie gathering going on. Mind if Chauncey and I join in?”

The group exchanged awkward glances before one of them said, “Uh, sure?”

John launched into a detailed story about how he acquired Chauncey at a niche market in Seoul, how they’d traveled the world together, and how Chauncey once “saved his life” during a rainstorm by acting as a pillow. By the time he was halfway through his anecdote about Chauncey’s brief modeling career for an online store, the group had dispersed under the pretense of “getting refills.”

“Maybe they’re not panda people,” John muttered to Chauncey. The plushie said nothing, but John swore its expression looked vaguely judgmental.

His final attempt came when he noticed a woman at the corner of the bar who seemed genuinely interested in plushies. She was flipping through photos of what appeared to be her collection and laughing with her friends. John saw his chance.

“Hi there,” he said, sliding up to her. “I couldn’t help but overhear—are those plushies? Because if so, you’ve got to see my collection. It’s one of the largest on the East Coast.”

The woman smiled awkwardly but humored him as he scrolled through dozens of photos on his phone. “This one’s Chauncey, my favorite,” John said, holding up his plush panda proudly. “He’s not just a plushie—he’s my best friend.”

Her face froze in a polite, distant smile, and one of her friends leaned in, whispering something. The group erupted into muffled laughter as the woman turned back to John. “That’s…cool. Well, I think we’re heading out. Good luck with Chauncey!”

They left, leaving John alone at the bar, sipping his Velvet Bear Martini in silence.

“Not everyone understands us, Chauncey,” John said, patting the panda’s head. Chauncey, as always, offered no response. Somewhere in the background, someone knocked over a tray of drinks, prompting more laughter. John sighed, motioned to the bartender for another round, and muttered, “At least I’ll always have you.”

Chauncey remained steadfastly quiet, his tiny tuxedo somehow looking smug.
 

Sega Dreamcast

party like it's 1999
May 6, 2009
47,946
7,625
Charlotte


Morons in the comments defending Daboll and saying he's a good coach because he took over a team that went 4-13 and won a playoff game.

They started that season 7-2, then went 2-5-1, to end with a mediocre 9-7-1 record. Then they beat an overachieving team with a completely unsustainable 11-0 record in one-possession games.

He had one good half-season stretch, and has been below average or worse since then. But go on, keep him and continue losing so we can all laugh.

f*** New York and f*** the Giants.
 

PanthersPens62

Paul & Stanley
Mar 7, 2009
24,273
5,497
Home of The Cup
@PanthersPens62 conflicted when both Hota / Al and College Gameday are airing simultaneously with the View :rolleyes:
1. The View is obviously not on today since ABC also carries the Parade.
2. College gameday from the Rose Bowl is always a bloody bore. Inside an empty stadium, no celebrity picker, droning on & on about 2 or 3 games. Pass. One plus......"Peter Herbstreit" can't go running amuck. :yo:
3. Its HODA.....not "Hota" :facepalm:
 

PanthersPens62

Paul & Stanley
Mar 7, 2009
24,273
5,497
Home of The Cup
I thought Hoda retired

1. Hoda's last day is a week from Friday.
2. You have to be a real lowlife to attack/insult random strangers on Twitter. How low will Kirk go? :dunno: As a wise former HF'er once said......."Man up". :laugh:

"You never critique Kirk"

brother I just eviscerated him
Please show me where you did this...........copypasta is not YOU eviscerating him. What I did above is eviscerating him. :nod:
 

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