Oh, if you're going to give me a thread to paste that, here's my comments on the films from my last rewatch frenzy (had to stop because I couldn't stand the idea of rewatching Ressurection).
Halloween (Carpenter, 1978) – I am fully aware this is supposed to be the superior film and bestest slasher ever. It's just not (IMO). I mean, it's still a pretty decent movie, and I still think it is an important slasher and has to be seen by any fan of the genre, but there's so many things that just don't work for me that it's hard not to think it's overrated (I don't think, for example, that it should be considered more important than
Black Christmas, nor a better film). Most of all – and I guess it's kind of a “hot take” – Donald Pleasance's Dr Loomis kind of ruins the film. That character is so bad that I can't rewatch
Halloween without considering him an accomplice to Myers, and probably the crazier of the pair. I've watched the extended TV version and it only adds to that feeling (his reaction towards a 6 y/o boy (foreshadowing his inexcusable behavior around the little girl in parts 4&5?) certainly aren't that of a psychiatrist). Don't worry, I know the film is not supposed to be read that way, but the guy leaves the hospital car for Myers to escape with, knows instantly where Myers is going, makes one stop during his 150 miles trip to Haddonfield, exactly where Myers stopped to kill someone and steal his overalls, there he manages to find the nurse's matchbox in the grass but not the body that lies three feet away from him, he sends the cop in every and all directions except the right one, he pretends he doesn't see the hospital car at the hardware store, pretends he doesn't see it right next to him the whole time he waits at the Myers house, and he tells the sheriff not to inform the population. The guy is shady, obsessed with a patient that hasn't said a word in 15 years. It's hard to think it's not blanks that he shoots at Myers.
I won't even comment on the fact that the 6 y/o boy who spends 15 years staring at the window without speaking to anyone knows how to drive when he escapes, because it's probably Loomis who taught him. The extended version has the “Sister” marking in Myers' hospital room that introduce the sequel's family twist. I think it kind of saves the day for the killer, who's too easily read as a frustrated incel who follows women around. At some point, he follows Laurie and her friend, in his stolen hospital car, from daylight to darkness, without them noticing him even though they know a weirdo with a stationwagon has been following them. He's bumper to bumper the whole time! This goes with my second big problem with the film: Carpenter's spatial construction. The body in the grass, the car that Loomis doesn't see even though it's right beside him, the doors that don't open the right way, the interiors that don't match the exteriors of the houses, and Laurie's fall in the staircase – nothing works. You have to give it to Carpenter for a few amazing moments (Myers coming out of the shadows, wow, but right after that he tries to stab Laurie and misses her even though she's 3 inches from him and doesn't see him coming, which for some reason pushes her over the handrail and into the stairs), but I just don't think he's that good a director at that time. The robbery at the hardware store is really hard to place in the timeline too. The film has some cool atmosphere at times, but it has so many weaknesses that I have a hard time going over
5.5/10.
Halloween II (Rosenthal, 1981) – It had been a while since I'd seen this one. I usually refer to it as my favorite slasher, and it might just be. The last 30 minutes probably are. The ride to get there is a little bumpy, but this last stretch has Michael Myers at his most threatening (and better looking), and manages to create a dark and claustrophobic atmosphere in the hospital. Dr Loomis even almost looks sane and credible (not really but a lot more than usual) for a few minutes there. The first hour is certainly a lot weaker, with cheap and ineffective “scares” (the cat in the dumpster, the killer behind the closing door – stuff that makes you wonder how few ideas Carpenter was left with), even one that is so weirdly constructed that I had to rewind it a few times (the girl goes towards the door at the right of the frame, something very common to get the spectator's attention to that side of the frame, the jump scare comes from another side, sure, but you have Myers jumping on her from mid-frame as if he was... on the floor?) - but I think it was the only time in this one I had to try to figure out spatial construction, a huge improvement on the original. Some of the kills in the first hour are way too sophisticated for a man who's been locked up since he was 6 years old, but since he somehow learned to drive, I guess he might have pick up some other skills. It's still a little inconsistent with his other range of actions (can't push a door open, walks through it). Points to the sheriff for acknowledging Loomis is in cahoots with Myers.
6/10
Halloween III: Season of the Witch (Wallace, 1982) - Very dark paranoid thriller mixed with decent gore. Gotta love the balls on this one, aiming for the children and not hesitating melting one with critters coming out of his face. The premise is great, the tone is great, but other than that, it's saddly pretty silly. The inexplicable stonehenge mystical bullshit is just too much, and the romance between the fugly womanizer doctor and the young lady who just lost her father the day before is hilarious (the line where she asks him where he'd like to sleep got me laughing out loud). Includes a little sexual harrassment seminar in the workplace with our good doctor slapping the ass of his lady colleague for fun. The film is on Roger Ebert's most hated list, but it's miles better than parts 4, 5, 6, H20, & Resurrection. In fact, I kind of like it.
4.5/10
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (Little, 1988) - After box office failure and poor fans reception, the halloween anthology films idea that was launched with the third entry was flushed and inevitably, Michael Myers did indeed
return. Now, the Halloween series has never been that good with continuity or logic (Myers escapes the loony bin at 21 years old after 15 years locked up but has no problem stealing a car, the first film ends with Loomis shooting Myers 6 times, but the second one begins with Loomis firing 7 shots - and then telling everyone he shot him 6 times, etc.), so it's only natural that after being burned alive and blinded, Myers returns has a dude that can walk around in a store to steal a mask with no problem, or drive a tow truck... This fourth entry is just a below-average slasher, with a very off-putting ending with Tommy Jarvis vibes. It still manages to look "ok" in a very weak series of films.
3/10
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (Othenin-Girard, 1989) - The premise of this one is the best of all (on a ridicule scale): after the events of the previous film, a wounded Myers crawls out of danger to a river that leads him to the hideout of a homeless man. He tries to attack him but collapses. One year later, next Halloween, Myers wakes up and kills the guy, who for some reason kept a comatose huge man in his tiny home for a whole year (or was he conscious and friendly this whole time?). Afterwards it's just the same crap, but with added bullshit (telepathy between young female Jarvis and Myers, some strange unidentified cult figure following Myers around) - you know how I like to read stuff into movies, and I'd love to use the fact that the killer is now played by a Native American and try to make the whole occult stuff make sense, but I don't think it's possible. The only good thing about the 5th film is that it confirms Loomis was the real psychopath all along (the only fun I have now revisiting the classic
Halloween film is to read it with Loomis as the psychotic mastermind and Myers as his homicidal pet project - always knowing where he'll be, sending cops away from him to clear his path, shooting blanks at him, etc.) - his behavior around the little girl here is just wrong.
2/10
Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (Chappelle, 1995) - The Carpenter film was such a simple story... One sequel after the other (actually starting with the original film's own TV version), people tried to be interesting and "explain" the whys and the hows of Michael Myers, without understanding that all this dumb stuff worked only because it was left unsaid. Now this 6th entry tries to tie up everything that happened before, and tries to make unintelligible stuff make sense. Tommy Doyle, the little boy Laurie was babysitting in the first film, is back and prepared for Michael's return. He moved next door to the Myers house, where Laurie's cousins lives unknowingly (yeah right, all eveybody in this town talks about is Michael Myers, but they wouldn't know they live in his old house) - and why do they live there? Because their uncle - Laurie's father - was the estate agent in charge of selling it (indeed he was in the original film), but never managed to do it, for obvious reason, so his brother made him a favor and moved his family in the murder house. Also, well, that unidentified man in black that followed MM around and ultimately destroyed the police station and killed everyone to free him (where MM was jailed with his mask on, never forget) is revealed to be Loomis' superior from the lunatic ward in the first film. Oh and Jamie was abducted by his cult at the end of part 5 (not in the movie, but believable), and this one starts with her giving birth to a baby marked by evil... That's already a lot, and that's nothing about what actually happens in the film.
Now there's two versions of this film. Different scripts, bickering on the set, a very poor test screening and a lot of changes that went against everybody's wishes and/or understanding of the film. Oh, and Donald Pleasance died before they shot additional material, nothing to help them. Speaking of the devil, Loomis appears a lot more sane than usual, but the theatrical cut ends up with him going back to Michael's body saying he has “a little business to attend to” and they disappear together (pretty much confirming he was only working with him from the beginning!) - the “producers' cut” and much better, the cult leader's powers are transferred to Loomis, making him responsible for MM and all future killer kids (yeah, that's a thing). That cut also includes stuff like a little incest between Michael and his niece, and the cult leader guy working at the ward explaining he was the one who taught Michael how to drive (they really wanted to explain everything with this one – still, Jamie who's been captive since she was 8 also escapes and knows how to drive... I guess it's just something you know). It's really a mess, and not a very good one (despite a few ok-efficient scenes), with missing parts and weird transitions, and some early 90s music video aesthetics here and there. It's still better than parts 4 and 5, and probably better than H20 and, of course, Resurrection...
3/10
Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (Miner, 1998) - I remember absolutely hating this film when it first came out. It's not as amateurish as the 3 previous chapters, but it is on the other hand so formulaic that it feels more like a made-for-TV pastiche than a sequel. Also, intertextuality is an amazing tool to bring depth and meaning to a work, to make a closed narrative reach out to other works for hints and ideas or tone ; Intertextuality is also the worst way to try to make something look cool or smart when it actually isn't. Kevin Williamson doesn't have his name in the writing credits of this film, but it stinks of his empty allusions the whole way through, and it's insufferable. It's really part 7, but they decided to cut all mentions of 4-5-6 and do as if they didn't exist - still, they were in the original screenplay and the new timeline was just some more unnecessary bullcrap. Bringing in Steve Miner was Jamie Lee Curtis' idea, and probably was a good one. I just wish I could go over
3/10.
And for the record, I like Zombie's remakes, the sequel even more than the first one (despite the cheesy white horse and mother crap). As for Resurrection, I think it would fall at 1.5/10 or close to that. It's not "so bad it's good", it's just really bad.
edit:
Halloween (Green, 2018) – This was my initial comment posted here a year ago:
Finally catched that one now that it's on Netflix Canada... Never understood how they thought it could be a good idea to, once again, make a sequel to only part of the Halloween films (H20 + H:Resurrection tried that with Jamie Lee Curtis and failed, and now the premise was even worse, also ignoring Halloween II, which is probably the best film of the whole lot, and only to put aside the brother-sister relationship). But no, they had to do it so extra-old Laurie Strode, now with a big "what would Sarah Connor do?" fetish, would get a third timeline (she already died twice!) to go against her non-brother. She has 40 years to prepare and both her trap and her plan are completely dumb. The Zombie films were far superior. 3/10 I'll add that the film tries to do a lot of what the original did, but it always feel clumsy: the no drinking (bad), smoking (bad), sex (bad) thing and the babysitter stuff are just ironic at this point, the crazy obsessed doctor is pushed way beyond the limits of suspension of disbelief (Loomis was already something, this one is ridiculous). There's a few scenes you've already seen in other entries with better execution and results, and I can't get over the fact that it kind of mocks the brother-sister storyline even though it really appeared in (the extended version of) the first film. I still have it at
3/10, but I must push it below H4 and H20 in the overall ranking.
edit 2:
Halloween (Zombie, 2007) – I am well aware that the Zombie remakes have a bad reputation. I am not myself a big fan of the Myers portrayed as a white trash family (and I can't stand Sheri Moon, her suicide scene is absolutely ridiculous!), and I think the background and explanations on the killer's persona are counterproductive in that they diminish the character more than they add to it (I do, on the other hand, appreciate the “love hurts” angle brought to his quest). Still, you can't really argue against the fact that Zombie has the strongest signature of all the directors who played with this material. The result – like it or not – is a lot more coherent as a whole, with clear intent and direction, than every other entries of the series. This first take might not be a great film (it's a very good
Halloween film IMO), but it's a brutal film, and a pretty dark slasher. I'm not too sure about that version of Loomis, as much as I've crapped on that character, I still enjoyed his ambivalence (and I must admit I get a kick out of the “These are the eyes of a psychopath” speech, during which Zombie shows us the eyes of Loomis, and not of Michael – also, the “you've became like my best friend” Loomis says to Michael).
4.5/10
Halloween II (Zombie, 2009) – Hard film to rate for me. I understand why most people absolutely hate it. The switch in tone and style, not only from the original series but even from the first film, is somewhat off-putting – and the new elements are either borderline unbearable (the emo/grunge Laurie Strode) or unbearably corny (the wannabe surrealist dream sequences and wannabe Freudian/Jungian imagery). Loomis is nothing more here than a caricature, the vocabulary level is abysmal (f*** f*** f***), and the lead actress is suddenly really bad (she wasn't that bad in the previous one). Still, I like this film a lot! I think the first 22 or 23 minutes are masterful – that's a fifth of the whole film, from which Laurie just wakes up, with no indication that any of it was part of what really happened following the previous film. Not only a pretty ballsy move in itself, but that long dream sequence is in fact introduced by a weird intellectualizing quote about the white horse in opening credits (from a book that I don't think really exists), pointing to the interpretation of dreams. The dream sequence also betrays itself through another intertext (an existing one this time) with the stretching of the
Nights In White Satin music video,
never reaching the end (brilliant reflexivity). That sequence is also a remake of
Halloween II, contained in the sequel to the remake of
Halloween. To me, this long introduction to the film is at a level no other slasher ever reached. Add to that some beautiful night shots, a few brilliant dissolves, and directorial amuse-gueules (Annie's murder first told only in sound), and you've got a very special film (I'm also partial to this rendition of Michael Myers as a gritty and brutal force). As clumsy as some of the dream visuals that appear after the introductory dream sequence may be, I think they contribute to the overall oneiric tone of the film. Zombie toyed with the idea of having Laurie as the real killer in the film and Michael only in her imagination, and part of these ideas were kept (the
Welcome to my Nighmare tag in her room, notably, but also the dream where she reproduces some of Michael's murders from the first film). This adds a layer of ambiguity to the final film (reinforced by the finale), which might just have added to people's disgust with it but that I think helps making it a more unique horror film. I had it at
6/10 and will keep it there.
edit 3:
Halloween Kills (Green, 2021) – The introduction of the “original characters” in the bar after the bird caller's scary reminder of Haddonfield's murders is so clumsy that you just knew the film would be a disaster. I guess they thought it was fan servicing to bring back a half handful of characters nobody cared about, just to off them for good this time. I liked the 1978 bits and the return of Donald Pleasance, but absolutely hated the 2021 characters and storyline – the vulgar interracial couple, the comic-relief gay couple, and the doctor-nurse black couple were all exhausting reminders that this movie right here was very much
of its times. I enjoyed the brutal and merciless version of Michael Myers, akin to the Zombie one, but that's just 10-15 minutes of the film, the rest of it was either working on repetition alone and felt overdone (the whole mob-going-dumb thing was pretty bad, and one more time for the back row:
Evil dies tonight!) or undercooked (the rushed 'he made us into monsters' wasn't working at all). It might be better than the previous one by a hair, but only because it got rid of the most ridiculous stuff.
3/10
edit 4:
Halloween Ends (Green, 2022) – The opening credits try to tell you something: this ain't your regular
Halloween movie. Not the original's and usual orange font, but the blue one used for
Halloween III: Season of the Witch – aka the one without Michael. It's at least a sign that the creators were consciously going astray. The problem is that it all feels like they had no idea exactly where they were going. It's clearly a film that tries to say something about evil being contagious, and able to spread its toxicity to a whole community (in logical continuity with the previous one), but it's never clever and most of the film's “discourse” passes through badly written dialogue – or worse, Lorie Strode's insufferable
Memoirs (“It's up to each of us to not let evil inside” – rewritten thrice to make sure that evil is not Michael Myers, but something more diffused). The opening credits are also inviting to read the film intertextually – and that sure would require watching it a few more times – but it doesn't seem at first look to have much to offer. Corey
Cunningham is an effective allusion to
Christine, it works. The babysitter is watching
The Thing with the kid, which also works and on a few levels: reference to a previous Carpenter movie, empty allusion to the original (where they were watching the original
The Thing, creating a somewhat complex network of originals and remakes, cute, but I can't think of an significant return), and, more interestingly, effective allusion to Carpenter's
The Thing, where evil spreads and is contagious. It's not dumb at all, and I'm sure there's more, but it feels more like an homage to Carpenter than a really meaningful intertext. As for the film itself, it's pretty bad. To match the themes of past trauma, Laurie Strode's character is suddenly an edgy gandma with a buried past (the lady went forty years preparing to trap and kill a monster she had no reason to believe would be back, going full Sarah Connor, and she suddenly gets over it when she actually knows he's out there and just killed her daughter... really?), which is the most stupid sequel writing I can think of, but also perhaps the only important new element to the story: Laurie the zen grandma is writing her
Memoirs. It has to be conscious distanciation and reflexivity: inviting the spectator to consider the process of writing (the sequels and remakes). That's the only way you can defend what's going on in this film: it pushes you back (from the opening credits) and invites you to read it as
written material, a metaphor or allegory. It's a very weak and confused one, it doesn't do a great job at anything, but I have to believe it tried. Otherwise, it's just a laughably bad and stupid
Halloween film, could just be the worst of all – and I'm really glad it is. From the get go, I couldn't stand Green's trilogy and I was really fed up with people using his 2018 reboot to diminish the Zombie entries. Now, you've got it: these three films were at the level of the worst straight-to-video sequels, but done with greater means. These films just picked from the original ones, from the obsessed doctor, to the hospital sequel, to Myers living in the sewers with the homeless, and did a terrible job at making it feel “better”. Green's terrible direction is also exposed in this one and it's so obvious, when he tries to do drama or romance, when he tries to direct more serious dialogues or voice-over narration, that he lacks the chops to hold everything together – the opposite of Zombie's strong signature. Until I can have a better understanding of what they were trying to invite us to read into this film, I'll rate it as what it is: an extremely poor
Halloween sequel.
1.5/10