The Players' Tribune: Patrick O'Sullivan details years of abuse UPDATED with article

[FormerLurker]

CBC podcast of his interview on The Current.

At the end, it includes an old Fifth Estate interview of his father.

The more I hear/read/see stuff like this, the more I step back from coaching my kids.

I listened to The Current on my way to work yesterday. The interview with his father was from 2004, and his father concludes by saying something like:

"Yeah I maybe went overboard a bit, I just wanted him to be better. And he'd be even better now if he had done what I told him".

When O'Sullivan was asked what he thought about that interview (which he had heard before), he said it was about just how delusional his dad was, thinking that he could make his son a better player.

O'Sullivan's message to all hockey parents is this: you are not the difference between your kid making the NHL or not. It's the kid's own sheer will, skill, work ethic, and discipline that will decide.

He hopes that some parents will read this book, look in the mirror, and change their behaviour. However he admits that some parents, like his dad, are too far gone to ever even pick up his book.

 

[Bure]

I feel for the guy. His father ruined him as a player.

 

[NEWFowler]

Absolute gut-wrenching stuff. It's just a game. Just a ****ing game.

 

[joestevens29]

I heard from day one he had issues, but never knew what they were. It's rather unfortunate, but good that he is coming out and letting everyone know his story.

He's still the guy that could've scored 40g for us one year, but only had 11. He tried for perfection all the time, trying to just pick that corner. Unfortunately now you can see why he was trying to be a perfectionist.

 

[Siludin]

I wonder if O'Sullivan considers himself successful within hockey because of his father, or unsuccessful within hockey because of his father. Clearly had an effect on his hockey career, and I don't necessarily agree that kids will make it to the NHL based on their inherent merits.

That paragraph reads weird because it sounds like I'm defending his father when I'm really not trying to.

 

[BenningHurtsMySoul]

Gilbert Brule is another name that comes to mind as someone not having the most supportive father.

Brule's parents stole all of his money. It's been pretty well documented.

 

[Siludin]

Brule's parents stole all of his money. It's been pretty well documented.

Links? Heard all about Johnson but nothing about Brule.

Edit: NVM found one here:

http://www.torontosun.com/2013/07/17/nhl-notebook-brule-blames-father-for-demise

 

[10coach*]

He played a lot of his youth hockey for different towns. His story was well known at that time that his dad was abusive. It's really too bad.

 

[THall4]

Its a big reason why he ended up in Edmonton. He was traded from the Kings to Carolina...where Crazy John lived..somewhere, somehow the Hurricanes were told he would not report (assuming through his agent) and he was then flipped to the Oilers for Erik Cole. Speculation here..but valid IMO

 

[aemoreira1981]

Now that I read this article...I wish that I had not. That was abuse, plainly and simply. There is a fine line between desiring the best for your child and being a maniacal perfectionist.

 

[Section32]

So sad this is so common.

I treat my kids like they r the Stanley Cup x1000.

But I am always aware of their friends and classmates.

If I ever get a "gut" feeling I will not hesitate to call someone.

 

[Riverdale]

Horrible. There is pushing your child to do their best and being tough, but then there is being abusive and downright cruel. This is an extreme example of taking it too far.

 

[Mickey Marner]

Not surprised, I've heard stories of his father's lunacy dating back to his OHL days.

 

[grN1g]

It was a grim and direct view into a horrid situation for a kid, hockey was his escape but at the same time his crutch... He could never truly just enjoy the game without those triggers happening for him, yet was to young, afraid, and unaware to try and move on from the game cause its all he knew... very sad.

But at the end of the article he says he understands the triggers now and has a way better grip on what happened to him and what he has control over, he seemed very excited for his fresh start and new future. Sounded like he wanted to get involved someway with kids who face similar problems, thinking theres alot of good hes going to do if he sticks with it, very excited for him.

 

[jimslob]

I feel for the guy. His father ruined him as a player.

If that was all it was it wouldn't be so bad.

 

[VainGretzky]

So the real POS was his dad. Disgusting.

 

[Voight]

Probably going to buy his book, his story has always intrigued me.

I had a friend who's dad was far from abusive but the one thing he did that I thought wasn't really fair was make my friend take boxing lessons to improve his fighting skill. He wasn't a goon by any means but his dad wanted him to know how to punch if he eve needed too in a game.

 

[The Stig]

CBC podcast of his interview on The Current.

At the end, it includes an old Fifth Estate interview of his father.

The more I hear/read/see stuff like this, the more I step back from coaching my kids.

Actually It has the opposite affect on me. It makes me want to strive to be the best hockey dad out there when I have kids some dy

 

[Voight]

Gilbert Brule is another name that comes to mind as someone not having the most supportive father.

Bobby Ryans dad was a convicted criminal who went on the run with the family when he (Bobby) was just a kid, so theres another one. Ryan and to change his last name from Stevenson to avoid any connections between the too.

 

[The Kingslayer]

I remember watching something on him on CBC. The Fifth Estate maybe? His dad was a POS. Mocking his own son at the draft or something

 

[Voight]

I remember watching something on him on CBC. The Fifth Estate maybe? His dad was a POS. Mocking his own son at the draft or something

Yea one of the links above has an excerpt from the Fifth Estate episode. Around 14mins-ish in.

 

[Sky04]

I can understand the conditioning program, even if it is a bit extreme, but the physical violence is just ****ing stupid. How the hell did this guy make it to the NHL under those circumstances, he wasn't even just a plug either, this guy was a legit NHL player who could've had a long career.

 

[SmellOfVictory]

Now that I read this article...I wish that I had not. That was abuse, plainly and simply. There is a fine line between desiring the best for your child and being a maniacal perfectionist.

The line wasn't particularly fine in this case, and I don't think it's fine in general. You can easily be a supportive parent who tries to instill discipline in your child while being a world away from physically or verbally abusing them. His dad was a psychopath, and that's the end of it.

 

[Kimota]

Worst thing is, Patrick always came off as the nicest guy. So I'm trying to imagine him as a kid living through that and it breaks my heart.

 

[Felix Unger]

The line wasn't particularly fine in this case, and I don't think it's fine in general. You can easily be a supportive parent who tries to instill discipline in your child while being a world away from physically or verbally abusing them. His dad was a psychopath, and that's the end of it.

Absolutely. There's nothing fine about it. As a parent it is sometimes hard, but necessary, to withhold privileges from your kids when they don't deserve them. They know how to push buttons. But I can't even imagine doing anything remotely similar to this. The chasm is both wide and deep.

Kids are motivated to do what they love. Good teachers and coach know how to motivate kids positively.