Welcome To The 20/21 Flyers Board NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot, PHASE THREE! Part Three!
Now that we have a bunch of shit, it’s time to grab a bunch more shit. The categories and draft order are below, with simple instructions in English. Learn to f***ing read, toes.
But first, I want to make sure you all understand how serious this is. Remember, what we are choosing are the only things we will have in the new dimension. If you want a vodka, or gin, or tequila, and you chose Heineken, you are f***ed. If you want to listen to the Beatles, and you chose the Rolling Stones, you are f***ed. If you want to watch “Fast & Furious 12: Social Injustice,” and you chose “Look Who’s Talking!” you are f***ed. See what I mean? Your stash is all you’ll have, so choose wisely. Or you’re f***ed.
Here are the categories, with simple explanations in English:
CATEGORIES
· Historical Player #2:
· Historical Player #3:
· Historical Player #4:
· Historical Player #5:
· Historical Player #6:
We already have one historical player, right? So what we are doing here is filling out our legends line - players from any time (but no current players), living or dead, but they really should be actual hockey players and not some stupid shit like a dog or an NBA player or a poggowoggo from Twitch. I’ll show you what I have to do as an example.
I already have RW Pavel Bure - that means that I need to select:
1 Left Wing
1 Center
1 Right Wing - Pavel Bure (DONE)
1 Left Defenseman
1 Right Defenseman
1 Goaltender
As far as positional integrity goes, we'll use Hockey Reference. Don't worry about the sides of LD and RD - you can have two of one, one of each, etc. You can’t pick someone that has already been chosen, obviously.
· Team Sandwich: This is going to be a nightmare. I don’t even know what to say - pick a reasonable f***ing sandwich and not a hot dog. Can be an existing sandwich or build your own.
· Team Automobile: Year, Make, Model, Color. Not “BMW” - a specific BMW. No aircraft, including spacecraft - that's for later.
· Team TV Show: Easy.
· Team Candy: Can be bag candy OR a candy bar. A specific f***ing candy. Don’t be an idiot.
· Team Message Board Poster: Rules TBD.
· Team Shoe: Just like your auto - brand, model. Not “Nike” - Nike Air Zoom Speed, blue with yellow swoosh, etc.
· Dealers Choice, Aka: Maximum Chaos: Pick Anything For Any Position You Want. We’ll deal with the consequences later.
Remember: “Chaos” is not the same thing as “Havoc.” Engage in the former, not the latter. We have a whole ton of stuff left over for PHASE FOUR! so don’t worry if categories you wanted aren’t in here - I will champion them later with the boss.
For the first round, we will give everyone 12 hours to get revved up again - for all the succeeding rounds, it will be six hours. The daily clock starts at 8 a.m. and ends at 10 p.m., all times Eastern. This is a MONGOOSE DRAFT, which is the same functionally as a snake draft, but isn’t named after the **** of the animal world.
Don't forget to tag the next person in your pick post AND send a PM.
DRAFT ORDER
1. JojoTheWhale
2. Lord Defect
3. Hollywood Couturier
4. ajgoal
5. Ghosts Beer
6. Strawberry Fields
7. BiggE
8. pit
9. Young Sandwich
10. Captain Dave Poulin
11. FlyerNutter
12. Dancing Panther
13. BernieParent
14. Rebel57
15. FlyTimmo
16. Chuck Downie
17. CanadianFlyer88
18. GKJ
19. Chinatown88
20. Hurricane28
1. JojoTheWhale
2. Lord Defect
3. Hollywood Couturier
4. ajgoal
5. Ghosts Beer
6. Strawberry Fields
7. BiggE
8. pit
9. Young Sandwich
10. Captain Dave Poulin
11. FlyerNutter
12. Dancing Panther
13. BernieParent
14. Rebel57
15. FlyTimmo
16. Chuck Downie
17. CanadianFlyer88
18. GKJ
19. Chinatown88
20. Hurricane28
RIVALRIES
| HOST | RIVAL | |
| Boston FlyTimmos | vs | Los Angeles Whalers |
| Chicago Chimpanzees | vs | Las Vegas Desert Ducks |
| Hay-On-Wye Bookworms | vs | Iqaluit Pain |
| Iqaluit Pain | vs | Hay-On-Wye Bookworms |
| Jacksonville Methgators | vs | Tampa Bay FireSticks |
| Las Vegas Desert Ducks | vs | Providence Platypi |
| Les Comiques de Saint-Louis-du-Ha!Ha! | vs | Boston FlyTimmos |
| Los Angeles Whalers | vs | New York M.A.D. Cats |
| Montreal Sexpos | vs | Quebec Lapins |
| New York M.A.D. Cats | vs | Montreal Sexpos |
| Philadelphia Villains | vs | New York M.A.D. Cats |
| Portland Fog | vs | St. Paul Stay Pufts |
| Providence Platypi | vs | Las Vegas Desert Ducks |
| Quebec Lapins | vs | Montreal Sexpos |
| Seattle Sockeyes | vs | Vancouver Beavers |
| St. Paul Stay Pufts | vs | Iqaluit Pain |
| Tampa Bay FireSticks | vs | Jacksonville Methgators |
| Vancouver Beavers | vs | Seattle Sockeyes |
| Virginia Beach Surge | vs | Washington Fascists |
| Washington Fascists | vs | Virginia Beach Surge |
* NO NAMING NAMES, NO PICK TIPPING, NO ICE CREAM BANTER, NO TWITCH SHIT, SNITCHES GET STITCHES!
LEARN TO F***ING READ!
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