I was waiting for someone to ask. im gave a short version but erased it .. in the spirit of opening day, im going to write a novel. Such a wild experience.
Opening day maybe 13-14 years ago. me and my future first wife are hammer time at the game. Around the 7th inning this thought hit me that I will probably have kids soon and wont be able to get arrested anymore and if I did want to run onto the field .. it was today or never.
So i started running down the stairs and some guy yelled" hey man you cant left field" and I hoped the wall. As i did my left shoulder slid out then back into socket. I run around outfield. The baltimore city paper described me as like a panicing squirrell going crazy.
Coolest thing was the crowd .. I would point to a section and then you hear this distant roar then I could actually 100% feel physically the power. never experienced anything like that.
So they arrest me and as im getting handcuffed my wife jumps onto the field, taps an officer on the shoulder and she gets arrested. They take us into the little booking station. I had a small bowl on me. Cop said take everything out of your pockets and put items in my hat. i did that w the bowl. he looks through it w a pen, doesnt see the bowl. I then ditched the bowl.
We are in the metal paddy wagon, im handcuffed to an iron circle. theres a metal wall btw the men and women side. Shes freaing out. First time I ever told her I love her. my daughter loves that part.
get to central booking Baltimore City on a Friday night. Strip down, get put in a holding cell with maybe 10 other people. Some dudes come right in and immediately lay on the floor. Spit riddled floor. Im like "why when there are seats on the benches open?". So the cell gets more and more crowed, my beer and weed are wearing off. Bunch of hispanic dudes and kids who couldnt be more then 18 for running pills.
After like 8 hours im f***ing exhausted, sitting up. Cell is packed like sardines, no floor spots open.
A dude gets called out and I snag his floor spot, using my shoes as pillows.
I am literraly spooing with another dude, we jammed in there.
Hours later they call some of us out for photo and fingerprinting. One of the dudes was a guy who i thought was my friend. We were sitting next to each other and talking. So I gently bumped him by accident as we were walking and he whispered 'Ill f***ing kill you". My heart died. Chilling.
eventually I get moved to a smaller cell where you wait to see the bail commissioner. Im in there with some kids and a drug dealer. He had a cell phone and everything. Calling in orders on the street runners. After commissioner (released personal recognizance and a court date) I end up in another holding cell with the drug dealer and sparked a f***ing joint.
Finally get out right at the 24 hour mark. We take a taxi home. Clean up the dog poop and walk the dogs.
My wife had a joint in her bra that they didnt find. She sd she was in the holding cell and when everyone fell asleep she pulled out the joint to eat it and she said this half dressed crackhead who didnt move for hours jumped up and said who got the weed?
baltimore city jail is crazy. Guys in longer lock up set a huge fire on their floor and the gurd was like "thats what they do on the weekend"
Youtube used to have videos of it. im the white guy in Os gear and orange stripped addidas. First wife is black chick in Os gear, long pull up orange socks
Court order we are banned, community service.
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worst holding cells are by far border patrols. Dirt floor and I kid you not .. a f***ing home depot orange bucket to piss and shit in.
Cleanest - pittsburgh
Funnest - san diego
Virginia - i was a minor so I didnt go into the normal adult cells but sounded loud. Officer played me the audio to try and scare me into confessing. said confess and parents can pick you up. Keep denying and you go in with those guys until Monday morning. I confessed. I did get to go home that night.
I had an incident with a Philly police horse a few years later but that was the last time I was officially arrested.