Has anyone been kicked out of a youth hockey game before?

[Mr Jiggyfly]

This is another “is this normal” for hockey parents posts.

This past weekend I was at my daughter’s tournament and I got kicked out of the game by the ref, but literally I’m innocent (I swear).

The game started with a boarding call, and the parents of my daughter’s team lost their collective minds.

They think because it’s bantam now you can just… hit ppl into the boards… no clue (they are mostly all morons).

The parents were a disgrace all game and one of the dads got thrown out by the ref in the middle of the second period.

Things got even more idiotic from there and the ref threw all the parents from our side out.. including me, even though I was sitting away from all of them and never said a word all game.

One of the parents jumped on the glass and asked the ref “what are you gonna do if I don’t leave”.

So the ref just let the clock keep running until all the parents left.

Just a massive shitshow and I was pissed my daughter had to watch me get tossed because of these wannabe adults.

I know one dumb ass dad/mom getting tossed has sadly happened too many times, but has anyone ever been at a game where all the parents from one side got booted in mass?

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[Porter Stoutheart]

Never seen that. Definitely lots of cases of a lone parent (or coach/bench personnel) getting tossed for jawing at the refs.

In a way, I kind of applaud the officials for going that route. It's unfortunate for the few like you who might be considered "collateral damage", because there are always a few like us who do sit away and stay silent no matter what transpires. But I have definitely been at games where multiple/majority of parents on both or either side got frustrated with officiating and were making themselves heard all game long. In those instances, the refs always just ignored it or singled out an individual if they could identify one. But I can definitely think of times where just tossing everybody or letting the clock run out might have been a reasonable option for them.

Basically I think parents are nuts in minor hockey in general, so, not being there to see everything that transpired leading up to this in your game, I'm inclined to side with the refs on this one. Even if they messed up a few calls, it shouldn't give the loonies in the stands carte blanche to make fools of themselves.

 

[Minnesota Knudsens]

Never heard of this before, but I know that last year a game against a rival city got pretty heated, because the calls against our kids seemed to be through the roof. Reffing in our league is pretty sketchy at times. Also certain refs have been known to inflate their importance

 

[Mr Jiggyfly]

Never seen that. Definitely lots of cases of a lone parent (or coach/bench personnel) getting tossed for jawing at the refs.

In a way, I kind of applaud the officials for going that route. It's unfortunate for the few like you who might be considered "collateral damage", because there are always a few like us who do sit away and stay silent no matter what transpires. But I have definitely been at games where multiple/majority of parents on both or either side got frustrated with officiating and were making themselves heard all game long. In those instances, the refs always just ignored it or singled out an individual if they could identify one. But I can definitely think of times where just tossing everybody or letting the clock run out might have been a reasonable option for them.

Basically I think parents are nuts in minor hockey in general, so, not being there to see everything that transpired leading up to this in your game, I'm inclined to side with the refs on this one. Even if they messed up a few calls, it shouldn't give the loonies in the stands carte blanche to make fools of themselves.

Refs made one bad call, but whatever.

It was just non stop stupidity from the parents starting with the boarding call a minute in, until we all got tossed.

When one dad got thrown out in the second, you’d think the other parents would have stfu.

But all the intelligent people know yelling at refs totally works out for you, on and off the ice, so why not double down on the stupid?

And that they did.

 

[patnyrnyg]

In NJ, if a parent is kicked out of a game, they receive a 30-day suspension from all team activities. Not sure if it is a USA hockey rule or just local. 2nd offense is 60 days and I believe the 3rd is 1 year. Parents are barred from attending practices or games. They are allowed to drive them to the rinks, but they are not allowed to enter. If the kid is too young to dress themselves and tie their skates, either someone else has to help them or the parent has to help the kid in the parking lot. They are allowed to sit in their car in the parking lot. Idea behind that is if the kid gets hurt, parent is still nearby.

But, have no idea what the repercussions would be if an entire team of parents were thrown out.

 

[Mr Jiggyfly]

In NJ, if a parent is kicked out of a game, they receive a 30-day suspension from all team activities. Not sure if it is a USA hockey rule or just local. 2nd offense is 60 days and I believe the 3rd is 1 year. Parents are barred from attending practices or games. They are allowed to drive them to the rinks, but they are not allowed to enter. If the kid is too young to dress themselves and tie their skates, either someone else has to help them or the parent has to help the kid in the parking lot. They are allowed to sit in their car in the parking lot. Idea behind that is if the kid gets hurt, parent is still nearby.

But, have no idea what the repercussions would be if an entire team of parents were thrown out.

That must be a local rule, because I’ve known parents who were kicked last season and were never suspended.

I want to say I wish we had that rule, but I’d be suspended for 30 days…

Earlier in the tournament we had a parent yelling dumb shit to kids on the other team (13 year olds).

Same game there was a dirty hit from behind into the boards by a kid on my daughter’s team.

I was pacing back and forth hoping this kid would get up, and as the 13 yr old child lay motionless for several minutes, parents were saying shit like he was faking it.

Zero concern this child could be severely hurt.

Then moments later a brawl almost broke out between parents on both sides. 9-10 dads bumping chests all up in each other’s faces….

A week earlier they had a tournament in Toronto and the parents were such a shitshow that the team manger had to send out an email to remind parents how to “behave”.

They couldn’t even go a week without being morons.

So all the red flags were there before all of us got booted last Sunday.

 

[BackToTheBrierePatch]

Entitled parents. How dare they call a penalty against their precious child.

 

[patnyrnyg]

That must be a local rule, because I’ve known parents who were kicked last season and were never suspended.

I want to say I wish we had that rule, but I’d be suspended for 30 days…

Earlier in the tournament we had a parent yelling dumb shit to kids on the other team (13 year olds).

Same game there was a dirty hit from behind into the boards by a kid on my daughter’s team.

I was pacing back and forth hoping this kid would get up, and as the 13 yr old child lay motionless for several minutes, parents were saying shit like he was faking it.

Zero concern this child could be severely hurt.

Then moments later a brawl almost broke out between parents on both sides. 9-10 dads bumping chests all up in each other’s faces….

A week earlier they had a tournament in Toronto and the parents were such a shitshow that the team manger had to send out an email to remind parents how to “behave”.

They couldn’t even go a week without being morons.

So all the red flags were there before all of us got booted last Sunday.

I know you are committed this year, but I would be finding a new team for my kid next season.

If there were isssues already, refs may have already been given the heads up and told to take care of things quickly.

 

[Slats432]

Never as a parent. Once as a coach. (And that could have been the worst reffing I have ever seen, but not a profanity was said. )

 

[Yukon Joe]

So no, never kicked out of a game, either as a player, parent or coach.

Never seen all the parents kicked out either - but I guess at a certain point the refs can't spend all their time policing which parent is saying which profanity, and in order to get on with the game you have to go with collective punishment.

But really - do you think the kids on the ice are going "cool! my dad's getting kicked out! I love how he's sticking up for me" versus "OMG how embarrassing... I wish my dad would just shut up"...

 

[patnyrnyg]

So no, never kicked out of a game, either as a player, parent or coach.

Never seen all the parents kicked out either - but I guess at a certain point the refs can't spend all their time policing which parent is saying which profanity, and in order to get on with the game you have to go with collective punishment.

But really - do you think the kids on the ice are going "cool! my dad's getting kicked out! I love how he's sticking up for me" versus "OMG how embarrassing... I wish my dad would just shut up"...

depends on the kid. By me, a lot of kids would think it is awesome as they then emulate the parents.

 

[Minnesota Knudsens]

It’s really difficult as a parent not to get emotionally involved in the game while you’re watching. I’m the first to admit that I live vicariously through my son when he plays hockey.

Having said that making a scene has the potential to not only embarrass your kid, but also make you look like a fool in front of the other parents. Certain behaviours cross the line. There are some parents that definitely get labeled “nut jobs”. Taking the coach aside to chew him out. Screaming at their own kids. In one case we even had a dude who screamed at everyone else’s kids (negatively). Then there are a whole other class: the dude who gets overly loaded on a travel weekend and loses it.

Most of our games the refs are teenagers who don’t have our elevated view of the game from the stands. The problem is that the mob psychology is difficult to fight. Once 3 or 4 parents witness a bad call together, it’s really hard not to complain or get a bit worked up.

 

[MeHateHe]

Pretty famous story around here of the referee who cleared the rink about 10 years back. It was a playoff game between two smaller communities, and the spectators were getting into it with each other. There was at least one physical altercation (maybe not exactly a fight, but close) and it was getting out of hand. So they cleared the rink and called the cops and then finished the game, which settled down to just hockey as soon as all the yahoos in the stands were out in the parking lot.

As to the OP, it kind of looks like the referee might have skipped a step or two. Back when I was still instructing at referee school, we'd always tell refs to use the bench to control the stands. If parents from one team were causing the problem, you go to the coach of that team and say the game doesn't resume until that parent was either settled down or gone. It is almost always just one dad who has no impulse control, and others feed off that bad energy.

Another minor hockey league I worked for made it a requirement that the home association was responsible for having security in the rink for games. It was always parents (sometimes from the team playing, sometimes not) but wearing a high-vis vest with "security" actually made them effective. If things went bad, they'd just call the cops anyway, but people act a lot more respectful if they see security in the building.

 

[Squiffy]

That's pretty toxic stuff. I've seen some behaviour from parents on my own kids teams and other teams that make me question humanity, but never an arena cleared, or half cleared, no.

It's early September and a long season. Honestly the team Association needs to step in, that can't go on for the next 8 months.

U15AA?