Player Discussion Elias Pettersson - Second Half Pete

[Knight53]

Might be top 5 player in the game right now.

 

[AlainVigneaultsGum]

Aw yeah buddy we need way more Elias "Basically McJesus but better" Pettersson up in this thread, all that animal does is butters perfect passes, pops bottles pops p***yes so keep your finger on that lamp light limpdick cause the forecast is goals.

f*** your cookie jar and your water bottles, you better get quality rubbermaids bud cause she's gonna spend a lot of time hitting the f***ing ice if Elias has anything to say about it. Blistering Wristers or fat clappers, this f***in guy can't be stopped.

If I had a choice of one attack to use to kill Hitler I would choose a Pettersson snipe from the top of the circle because you f***ing know his evil dome would be bouncing off the end boards after that puck is loosed like lightning from the blade of God's own CCM. I'd just pick up the phone and call Elias Pettersson at 1-800-TOP-TITS where he can be found earning his living at the back of the goddamn net. The world record for a recorded sniper kill is 3,540m, but that's only because nobody has asked ya boi Pettersson to rip any wristers at ISIS yet.

If i had three wishes, the first would be to live forever, the second would be for Elias Pettersson to live forever, and the third would be for Elias to plant one right on my cheek.

 

[LordBacon]

TAw yeah buddy we need way more Elias "Basically McJesus but better" Pettersson up in this thread, all that animal does is butters perfect passes, pops bottles pops p***yes so keep your finger on that lamp light limpdick cause the forecast is goals.

f*** your cookie jar and your water bottles, you better get quality rubbermaids bud cause she's gonna spend a lot of time hitting the f***ing ice if Elias has anything to say about it. Blistering Wristers or fat clappers, this f***in guy can't be stopped.

If I had a choice of one attack to use to kill Hitler I would choose a Pettersson snipe from the top of the circle because you f***ing know his evil dome would be bouncing off the end boards after that puck is loosed like lightning from the blade of God's own CCM. I'd just pick up the phone and call Elias Pettersson at 1-800-TOP-TITS where he can be found earning his living at the back of the goddamn net. The world record for a recorded sniper kill is 3,540m, but that's only because nobody has asked ya boi Pettersson to rip any wristers at ISIS yet.

If i had three wishes, the first would be to live forever, the second would be for Elias Pettersson to live forever, and the third would be for Elias to plant one right on my cheek.

This deserves a nobel prize.

 

[604]

from the blade of God's own CCM.

God doesn't use a CCM...Petey was using a Bauer Agent stick tonight...looked like a new twig.

 

[Russian_fanatic]

It's so bitter sweet loving EP and watching his progress, because we're going to loose him in 2025, because of this shitty ownership + management group.

 

[Luck 6]

There can be not doubt that EP is playing at an elite level... right now but we are in December and there's a lot of season left. He is 100% healthy (despite the constant suggestions that he is "playng hurt" or "nursing an injury"). IMHO this is pretty much as good as it's going to get; he might improve a bit but, again IMHO, I think it is far more likely he will sustain some sort of injury that doesn't cause him to miss any games but knocks him off his game enough to seriously hinder his play. We have seen this before with him. Now as far as I care as long as FAQ is hell bent on running this team into the ground I say give EP a trillion dollars and then wait for the inevitable career ruining injury to turn him into next year's Miller, Eriksson etc. If that doesn't happen I pretty much guarantee he demands a trade somewhere glitzier. He doesn't sound committed to this team/city to me. Enjoy it while you can...

He doesn’t? Based on what? Everything that has come out recently suggests the opposite.

 

[rypper]

There can be not doubt that EP is playing at an elite level... right now but we are in December and there's a lot of season left. He is 100% healthy (despite the constant suggestions that he is "playng hurt" or "nursing an injury"). IMHO this is pretty much as good as it's going to get; he might improve a bit but, again IMHO, I think it is far more likely he will sustain some sort of injury that doesn't cause him to miss any games but knocks him off his game enough to seriously hinder his play. We have seen this before with him. Now as far as I care as long as FAQ is hell bent on running this team into the ground I say give EP a trillion dollars and then wait for the inevitable career ruining injury to turn him into next year's Miller, Eriksson etc. If that doesn't happen I pretty much guarantee he demands a trade somewhere glitzier. He doesn't sound committed to this team/city to me. Enjoy it while you can...

Horrible take.