Listen. Of course I would prefer he was on a rival but the joke doesn't work if I start listening caveats.
I do not want him, not one bit!
Not on my team, not in SJ kit!
Not in the net, not in the crease,
I do not want him, not in peace!
I do not care if he's quite tall,
Or if he makes a great big wall!
His glove’s too slow, his stick's not quick,
He makes mistakes that make me sick!
I do not want him on my squad,
Not even if I have a nod!
His rebounds bounce, they go astray,
And then the puck finds a way to play.
I do not need him for my win,
Not even if he tries again!
His pads are big, but what's the use?
I just don’t want him, no excuse!
Not in the East, not in the West,
I just don’t want him—he’s not the best!
So please, dear coach, don’t make me squirm,
Find a goalie who can truly affirm!
I would not like him on a boat
I would not like him on a goat
I would not like him in a tree
I would never like him, even at sea!
I wouldn't want him underground
I would take anyone else, pound for pound!
I do not want him, can you not you see?
Not even if he’s completely free!
No, Alexander Georgiev—
He’s just not the goalie I want wherev!