the hurricanes in an alternate robot universe

[the halleJOKEL]

there is a website, talktotransformer.com that uses a language model developed by openAI to generate coherent text one word at a time based on whatever input you give it. the model sometimes produces some interesting results with the right input:

here we have brad malone, the 24th best goalie in the NAHL (but 5th best in his draft class), signing an entry level contract after ron francis decided not to tender him a qualifying offer as an RFA while ripping the CBA to shreds. malone has actually already bounced around the league and survived the weird 2010 offseason where carolina moved to and played in florida. looks like he was recently the second best goalie in the AHL, so i think he will be a good pickup:

The Carolina Hurricanes made headlines today when General Manager Ron Francis announced that the front office had decided to forego an offer to free agent restricted free agent forward Brad Malone and made the highly surprising decision to sign him to an entry level contract today.

Malone was recently ranked by Hockey Reference as the 24th best goalie in the North American Hockey League and according to the website, he's "one of the top 5 goalies in this year's class."

Malone joined the Carolina Hurricanes in 2008 after playing college hockey in the state of North Dakota. He spent his first four seasons in Carolina but moved to Florida with Carolina following the 2009 season and spent the 2012 season on the trade block following the trade to the Boston Bruins where he remained until March of 2013. After being traded, he signed with the Atlanta Thrashers in the AHL but never quite made it to his second full season in Carolina.

He was also the second-best goalie in the AHL in 2013/14 with a 33-13-7 record.

While a team seeking an offensive superstar would make a good fit with Malone's defense, he can't help but be a key weapon for them on the right side if given time.

Since joining the Thrashers, he has posted a 5-3-0 record, a 2.45 goals against average and .921 save percentage

an old news article from aho's memorable concussion in his rookie season caused by korpisalo. his helmet was a different shape and size than normal which lead to the injury. he still scored the goals, though!

The Carolina Hurricanes star center, Sebastian Aho, iced his latest concussion after a collision with Toronto's Joonas Korpisalo.


Aho was wearing a helmet of a different shape and size, which would not allow him to have a better contact while driving to the scorer's table to give the puck a chance to shoot. Aho didn't have a concussion-like effect on Korpisalo either.


As expected, the rookie scored the goals after Aho and Korpisalo collided, but with the help of a fan-requested video of Korpisalo driving into Aho.


"To see it go for a pass that got through the net, we hope he's ok," coach Gerard Gallant said.

Video highlights

an excerpt from anton babchuk's player's tribune on what it takes to make it in the league and his admiration for his new coach john torterella, the back-to-back cup winning former coach/body clone of the florida panthers:

Anton Babchuk and the Carolina Hurricanes  

If your goal is to be a hockey player, you must have the drive to play. That drive will be tested every night, by other players who are trying to find that drive, and with each new practice day brings a different challenge to the players. They'll face better players. They'll make mistakes. There will be more time spent shooting and checking and passing; they'll make more mistakes; the clock will start counting down on the next shift. This is a learning experience even for the best players.

The good news for the team is in all of this, they have a coach. And I mean really good. John Tortorella, who's been with the team since it started, knows how to lead a hockey team. He coached the Florida Panthers to back-to-back Stanley Cup championships and, as of last season, has been in charge of the Hurricanes for 18 games. On a given night, Tortorella will likely have a backup in with him. He won't need them; there will be a backup when he steps back in front of the TV screens. And when Tortorella is gone, he'll have a second, and hopefully even a third. Just to make sure the team is ready.

We had some bad news on the ice Monday night, though

this offseason, lets rediscover and piece together the history of the carolina hurricanes in this alternate universe.

Click to read more...

 

[Svechhammer]

Dammit, @Roboturner913 , look at what you've done

 

[the halleJOKEL]

HFBoards moderator DaveG was quoted as saying, "The Carolina Hurricanes are a better team than they were before and while they've won a lot of games last year, it's easy for people to forget when you lost in overtime. The season's over. The first four games you lost, we won them."

 

[the halleJOKEL]

strong words from the owner:

Carolina Hurricanes owner Tom Dundon stated, "The Canadiens are irrelevant to me. I want to beat every team," and fans were quick to agree. And now the team wants a franchise that has so many fans who think they're going to be great, and it sounds like there's a very good chance that's what happened.

Dundon did go on to say, "We're going to continue pushing for it. We are trying to make them work, to get the business in the right direction. But if you ask the other team, the only ones that are going to understand what it means for our business. It doesn't make them happy. I know how much they want to win but if you get to that point where, if you're on a playoff run, winning five or six, your fans are going to say I feel like what have I done here?"

additional context from another publication:

Carolina Hurricanes owner Tom Dundon stated, "The Canadiens are irrelevant to me. I want to beat every team," in reference to his team's 0-8 start.

FIFA has already taken action against Dundon, the Hurricanes, and the Canadiens, as the game has been declared unfair, and the game will have to be replayed.

 

[the halleJOKEL]

can't wait to see what abdelkader can do in the playoffs with his size, skilled-ness, and physical skills. also huge that we will have an official photographer take the photographs rather than the amateurs we used to have

With the second overall pick in the 2018 NHL Entry Draft, the Carolina Hurricanes are pleased to select left wing Justin Abdelkader out of the University of Maryland with the third overall pick. Per the team's official website, Carolina has designated an official photographer to photograph Abdelkader on the practice ice Thursday and Friday.

"Justin has the size, skilled-ness and physical skills to be an important cog for our power play and add to our attack, and while he may not have had a ton of experience on the ice, we appreciate his versatility and dedication to helping out on our defense," said General Manager Ron Francis. "We look forward to having him in the lineup for Game 1 of the 2017 Calder Cup Playoffs against Edmonton tonight."

 

[Roboturner913]

Dammit, @Roboturner913 , look at what you've done

Look, I like robots. Probably a little too much, TBH

But I didn't have anything to do with this

unless I did

 

[Svechhammer]

Look, I like robots. Probably a little too much, TBH

 

[the halleJOKEL]

Look, I like robots. Probably a little too much, TBH

But I didn't have anything to do with this

unless I did

i just find predictive text algorithms hilariously fascinating, so you dont have to take any credit

 

[Novacane]

Let’s see how the goaltending tandem of Matt Murray, Anders Lindback, and Scott Darling fairs this season

Last season, the Carolina Hurricanes made the playoffs with five different goaltenders, with Matt Murray, Jay McClement and Anders Lindback all being worth mentioning.

What will make the Hurricanes' current goaltender battle even more intriguing is that none of them are on a contract for more than three seasons. One goaltender, Scott Darling, is not earning nearly as much money as Murray and Lindback are. And one goalie, Craig Anderson, isn't as good as Murray, though he is now earning much more than Anderson was at this point last season.

What gives?

Anderson, in fact, isn't paying what he is making in salary this season. The Hurricanes are paying him more than he was making last season. Not to mention, Anderson is only 28 years old and could easily be looking after the crease a little longer than Murray does.

It all starts when Anderson starts to walk off the ice. Last season, Anderson had one save with the Carolina Hurricanes during this six-game playoff series against the New Jersey Devils. He posted only 26:27 of ice time during that span, which came in the series' closing games in which Tampa ended up falling in five.

It hasn't been the same this season. So far in the regular season, the Hurricanes goaltenders have had four shutouts in 20 games against the Devils including one victory for Anderson.

 

[Roboturner913]

Read, if you dare:

 

[the halleJOKEL]

Let’s see how the goaltending tandem of Matt Murray, Anders Lindback, and Scott Darling fairs this season

rip anderson and his one save in 6 playoff games on 26:27 minutes of ice time

 

[Svechhammer]

Read, if you dare:

I'm not sure why I expected anything else out of that click

 

[Roboturner913]

I'm not sure why I expected anything else out of that click

Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.

 

[the halleJOKEL]

Some plaudits for the 97-98 squad:

The 1997-98 Carolina Hurricanes were no different from the 1998-99 Ottawa Senators and 2001-02 Florida Panthers.

"All they got was a little less-than-stellar success," said Marc Bergevin, at the time a player for the New Jersey Devils. "It wasn't a great year by any means, but it didn't really count since I was a part of it."

The 1997-98 Carolina Hurricanes were the only team to be named to the All-Star Game, making them just two years removed from reaching that milestone.

"The fans deserve nothing less than the greatest NHL team from Carolina," Hurricanes General Manager Scott Malkin said in a statement. "The Carolina Hurricanes all deserved their way to such an honored honour this past year. We look forward to bringing this legendary franchise back to life, and making it a reality by honoring this amazing fan favorite for 2016-17."

 

[Lempo]

Read, if you dare:

"I used sand paper. Holy crap you people are lonely"

 

[Lempo]

I think it's broken.

Patrik Laine has been dominant, and the Flames are the best team in the NHL in his absence, but what's even more impressive about Pekka Rinne is that he has been incredibly steady. Rinne was supposed to be his third or fourth goaltender in four rounds of the playoffs, but he is the second-best in the tournament with a 0.834 save percentage since the start of each of the past three years. Rinne is also 2-0-0 in his last nine starts. His .991 save percentage compares to the .939 average among NHL goaltenders.

Last year, Rinne was the fourth-best goalie in the playoffs in save percentage, trailing Ryan Miller (0.934), Corey Crawford (0.911), Corey Crawford (0.911), and Martin Jones (0.958).

With Pekka already having led the NHL in wins by six games in his first season back, it really doesn't make sense why this is a problem to him. Rinne can control his emotions now, which is why we're talking about that he has never won an individual Stanley Cup. Not even as a teenager with the Pittsburgh Penguins and then as a 21-year-old with the Arizona Coyotes.

But Rinne has been inconsistent, which is what makes this one of those situations where Rinne will need

I'm reminded of the time when I learned of the hockey romance novel scene, and wished that the authors would set up a shared universe and a League with their respective fictitious teams.

 

[the halleJOKEL]

i never noticed the similarity of patrik laine and pekka rinne's names. can we confirm they aren't the same person?

 

[Novacane]

Let’s see how the white caps work on the road this season

Last season, the Carolina Hurricanes made the playoffs for the first time since 1999 – an unprecedented feat. How did they do? Well, the Hurricanes will start next year with a different uniform than the ones they wore last season. The team won with a "no cap number" jersey and a plain white jersey from the 2004-05 season, while they went with a dark blue "No Cap" jersey last season.

For the third straight season, every player wore a different uniform. This season there may be some adjustments in the alternate shirt designs. Some will still wear the blue/grey uniforms the team had last season, but there will be some changes. One of the biggest changes is that players will be replacing the white jerseys with white caps. I'm not really sure if any of them are wearing a number, but this makes sense for now.

This is the last preseason for Carolina's new uniforms

Players will also be wearing a new number, number 6, on their jerseys.

Here are the players and jerseys for this year's preseason:

Cam Ward – C | 20 G | 19 A | 33 Pts | +16 G | +8 A

 

[the halleJOKEL]

what is the significance of the number 6???

 

[Lempo]

what is the significance of the number 6???

 

[vorbis]

what is the significance of the number 6???

 

[HisIceness]

i never noticed the similarity of patrik laine and pekka rinne's names. can we confirm they aren't the same person?

Have you ever seen them in the same room together? Makes u think....

 

[Roboturner913]

I'm a free man
and my blooooooood is my oowwwwwwwwwwnnnnnn nowwwwwwwwwww

 

[Syckle78]

can't wait to see what abdelkader can do in the playoffs with his size, skilled-ness, and physical skills. also huge that we will have an official photographer take the photographs rather than the amateurs we used to have

Took an alternate reality for us to get rid of the Abby contract but thanks all the same.

 

[WreckingCrew]

I'm a free man
and my blooooooood is my oowwwwwwwwwwnnnnnn nowwwwwwwwwww