i literally shit myself at planet shitness all over the bench press bench 5.99 sweatpants ruined

Status
Not open for further replies.

Egg

Registered User
Sep 3, 2007
2,321
467
LITERALLY EXPLODED ALL OVER THE WORKOUT BENCH

We know this story is fake. You haven't seen a workout bench, since your wife fell off of one, trying to grab twinkies in a cupboard. The irony was totally worth it, however.

Who are we kidding. That wasn't your wife, but your siblings, because you still live at home with your mom.

A little honesty goes a very long way.
 

Bumpus

Shhh ...
Mar 4, 2008
2,518
1,247
WV
LITERALLY EXPLODED ALL OVER THE WORKOUT BENCH, MULTIPLE MEMBERS WERE GAGGING AND VOMITING `N` ONE OF THE ENPLOYEE`S WAS IN TEAR`S. I DIDNT CLEAN IT UP BECAUSE ITS NOT MY JOB, I TOOK AN UBER HOME TO KEEP MY Ford® Ranger CLEAN. 2 MANY PROTEIN SHAKES 2DAY, LET THIS BE A LESSON. :clap:

DROPPING FAT LOADS :yo::yo::yo:
Always pictured you as more of an exercise bike kind of guy.

mac-iasip.gif
 

Egg

Registered User
Sep 3, 2007
2,321
467
LITERALLY EXPLODED ALL OVER THE WORKOUT BENCH, MULTIPLE MEMBERS WERE GAGGING AND VOMITING `N` ONE OF THE ENPLOYEE`S WAS IN TEAR`S. I DIDNT CLEAN IT UP BECAUSE ITS NOT MY JOB, I TOOK AN UBER HOME TO KEEP MY Ford® Ranger CLEAN. 2 MANY PROTEIN SHAKES 2DAY, LET THIS BE A LESSON. :clap:

DROPPING FAT LOADS :yo::yo:

Translation:

"I farted, while struggling to lift my 25lb weight on the bench press machine.

Two female staff laughed, as the fart wasn't only air.

There was no need to clean it, as am well over 400lbs. It literally was lost somewhere in one my creases. Most of it, at least.

Just the embarrassment of my dookie stained pink leggings.

They helped me get up, and I went home with whatever dignity I had left--none.

Me writing these threads, give me something I never had.

Invisibility, and attention.

I almost said anonymity, but that is essentially the story of my life.

Please understand why I do this."

:clap::clap::bow::lightningbolt:lightningbolt:towel:
 
Last edited:

MetalheadPenguinsFan

Registered User
Sep 17, 2009
66,905
20,745
Canada
Translation:

"I farted, while struggling to lift my 25lb weight on the bench press machine.

Two female staff laughed, as the fart wasn't only air.

There was no need to clean it, as am well over 400lbs. It literally was lost somewhere in one my creases. Most of it, at least.

Just the embarrassment of my dookie stained pink leggings.

They helped me get up, and I went home with whatever dignity I had left--none.

Me writing these threads, give me something I never had.

Invisibility, and attention.

I almost said anonymity, but that is essentially the story of my life.

Please understand why I do this."

:clap::clap::bow::lightningbolt:lightningbolt:towel:

I heard it was yoga that did it.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Ad

Upcoming events

Ad

Ad