This thread hit me hard.
Back in 2011 everything seemed to be just fine. Pale yellow Labrador, Scout was his name, and a big house in the hills. We lived in Scarborough back then, my wife and I. Had three kids too. Idris was the youngest, such a talented little fella. He could skate, pass and shoot the puck. We jokingly nicknamed him "RD". Sometimes he went just by the name of Larry, the greatest RD there ever was. And a local hero, if I may add. Many times the family gathered at the rink, watching Idris play. Man. I always thought to myself: "that's my little fella". Back in '11 I had everything I ever wanted from life.
But as you could guess, everything - and I mean everything - came crashing down. Wife left me. I completely fell apart. She took the kids with her, moved back to Oshawa. I started drinking. One night I drove to their apartment, started yelling some real stupid shit at my ex-wife. Told her I hate her. Wished she was dead. I don't know man. Tough stuff. I'll never forgive myself for what I did that night. But when I heard those words come out of my mouth, I realized something. For the first time since the divorce (or ever), I could now see why my wife left me. I was so bitter and angry. And I guess I've always been that way. Constantly complaining about something, picking fights, always hurting inside because even a minor setback in my life would make me think about ending it all. I could now see, that the decission my wife made, was the right one. So I guess I had to confront my wife, and my feelings, in order to continue with my life.
She got a restraining order against me. Meaning if I go anywhere near my kids or her, I end up in jail. That really broke me. Whiskey for dinner for like what, 7 years? I couldn't be sober for more than three days in a row. And for a long time, I blamed that on my wife. By the end of 2016, I was a 240 lbs, alcoholic and pretty much done. Didn't shave my beard for a year and a half. No luck with the women of Ontario. Came pretty close to losing my job too. But then I joined Twitter, and man, it might be the best decission I ever made. Actually it saved my life. The Leafs community helped me get rid of the booze and really came together to support me. One guy in particular, Matt Harvey, changed my mindset and really put me back on the right track.
But yeah, haven't seen my kids in 6 years. Hockey and my job is everything I got left.
Nice topic.
-Kevs