OT: 108th Obsequious Banter Thread: Nine dozen eggs and not one broken

[Runner77]

 

[Embiid]

Russian Lawmaker Who Slammed Putin’s War Dies in Window Fall

Two days before Pavel Antov fell out a window, a Russian businessman he was traveling with was also found dead, according to local reports.

www.thedailybeast.com

A wealthy Russian businessman and regional lawmaker from Vladimir Putin’s United Russia party plunged to his death from a hotel window in India over the weekend—two days after a fellow Russian he was traveling with was found dead in the same hotel.

Pavel Antov, 65, who topped Forbes’ list of the richest Russian lawmakers in 2019, thus joins a rapidly growing list of prominent Russian figures found dead in mysterious circumstances.

I think there's a list of like 20 or more prominent Russian politicians/media/wealthy since the Ukraine invasion who criticized Russia's actions in it and have died under mysterious circumstances with like 10-12 being the 'fall from window'

That Jennifer Lawrence russian spy movie was so badly made. They should have spent at least half the movie learning how to push people out of windows.

That's pronounced "Vindow".....

 

[Runner77]

Was too busy when I first saw this, but this is absolutely glorious and I must show my wife when I can

Thanks, much appreciated.

I had made another version. Just my way of paying homage to one of my favorite recurring features in this thread. Hoping you'll find it acceptable/ tolerable.

 

[Beef Invictus]

Thanks, much appreciated.

I had made another version. Just my way of paying homage to one of my favorite recurring features in this thread. Hoping you'll find it acceptable/ tolerable.

It turns out she wants another pizza blanket. One that is hers, not stolen. We discovered this when she said "I hope this is a pizza blanket!" As she picked up every. Single. f***ing. Gift. Both at home and at the in-laws.

I asked if I could have my pizza blanket back if she gets one. She laughed. We did order one while she was opening gifts. Let's see where this goes.

 

[landsbergfan]

my phone fell out of my pocket on christmas and the screen stopped working. thought it might be a loose cable but no its just f***ed. I cracked it when opening it up to investigate anyway so no more warranty.

 

[Lord Defect]

@Lord Defect you ever use the Ryobi hobby station? It looks pretty great, and I got a home depot gift card. Been trying to make a cutting board and hand chiseling the juice grooves is looking like shit because I am shit, so I figure I can rout with that and do tons of other stuff.

I have not but I would suggest getting a decent hand router, and making one jig for each size cutting board you will make.

 

[Embiid]

Cool....Serbia and Kosovo are at it again. Not like we need a second front proxy war. Serbia of course is close with Russia and the whole NATO bombing of Serbia back when Bubba was Prez is still pretty controversial...

 

[Striiker]

It turns out she wants another pizza blanket. One that is hers, not stolen. We discovered this when she said "I hope this is a pizza blanket!" As she picked up every. Single. f***ing. Gift. Both at home and at the in-laws.

I asked if I could have my pizza blanket back if she gets one. She laughed. We did order one while she was opening gifts. Let's see where this goes.

I don’t know why you’re being so difficult about this.

The kid just wants a pizza blanket. It’s not like it’s asking for crystal meth.

 

[Hollywood Cannon]

I don’t know why you’re being so difficult about this.

The kid just wants a pizza blanket. It’s not like it’s asking for crystal meth.

Pizza blankets are a gateway drug.

 

[Kermit the Prog]

Pizza blankets are a gateway drug.

It's true, It leads to Snuggies. Then to heroin.

 

[Striiker]

Pizza blankets are a gateway drug.

Narc

 

[JojoTheWhale]

If anyone is into board games, Barnes & Noble is a flat 50% off on everything for some strange reason. This is literally the best board game sale ever.

I bought 18 games today for $432 with tax. Amazon value is 800+ before tax. These aren't filler games either. I picked up Spirit Island, Ark Nova, and Dune among others.

 

[Chinatown88]

If anyone is into board games, Barnes & Noble is a flat 50% off on everything for some strange reason. This is literally the best board game sale ever.

I bought 18 games today for $432 with tax. Amazon value is 800+ before tax. These aren't filler games either. I picked up Spirit Island, Ark Nova, and Dune among others.

Their website still sucks

 

[JojoTheWhale]

Their website still sucks

The store sucks. Except right now. Right now they rule.

 

[Chicken N Raffls]

That's pronounced "Vindow".....

When rommservice knocks on the door....

 

[FLYguy3911]

The store sucks. Except right now. Right now they rule.

Did you get Starbucks too?

 

[trostol]

If anyone is into board games, Barnes & Noble is a flat 50% off on everything for some strange reason. This is literally the best board game sale ever.

I bought 18 games today for $432 with tax. Amazon value is 800+ before tax. These aren't filler games either. I picked up Spirit Island, Ark Nova, and Dune among others.

i've got the Fallout board game from 2 years back still unopened lol

 

[Kermit the Prog]

Was playing Trivial Pursuit when it first came out and one of the answers was blatantly wrong. Can't remember the question, but it was in the Sports category and I knew the answer cold. Problem was, there was no one I could call, complain to, or reason with except a flimsy card. So I shot the first person who smirked. I miss grandma sometimes.

 

[Beef Invictus]

If anyone is into board games, Barnes & Noble is a flat 50% off on everything for some strange reason. This is literally the best board game sale ever.

I bought 18 games today for $432 with tax. Amazon value is 800+ before tax. These aren't filler games either. I picked up Spirit Island, Ark Nova, and Dune among others.

How long does this last

 

[Beef Invictus]

Hell of a car ride home tonight.

(The Child has been telling us of a reading app on her iPad at school)

Child: Daddy, pretend you don't know that I'm on level 3.
Me: Wow, you aren't on level 3?
Child: Mommy, pretend you and everyone knows I'm on Level 3!
Beefette: Wow, you don't know she's on level 3? Foolish.
Child: (cackles) Yes keep fighting! Fight more!
Me: oh my god she's trying to turn us on each other, she's dividing and conquering.
Child: Yes! (more cackling)

----Later, after a period of silence----

Child: How do babies get out of the mommies?
Me, Muttering: Holy f***ing shit.
Beefette: You're too young. I'll tell you when you're ten.
Child: Not ten! I need to know now! I'm all out of waiting! I don't wanna be a kid anymore!
Beefette: (pause to think)
Beefette: Ok, there are two ways. One way is that the doctor cuts open the belly and takes the baby out. The other way is that it comes out of your "bottom."
Child: (processes)
Child: (Sobs) I don't wanna have any more birthdays! I wanna stay five forever! I'm scared!
Beefette: Well. This reminds me that I meant to ask her pediatrician about therapy for her adult-level anxiety.



My need to drink went from 0-100 the second she asked that.

 

[ellja3]

So, I was carrying a dried Carolina Reaper in my laptop bag for months (in a small zip-lock bag, of course), because I promised to give it to a friend of mine, but our meeting had to be postponed and then I just forgot about the pepper being there, in a reallly small side-pocket. Today, while looking for my earphones, I found it.

Good: Pepper was 95% rubbed into powder. It's been a long while and I've been using that bag 3-4 times a week. Good, because the spiciest peppers are nice to use in such ''format'', there's very few psychos that eat them whole.

Bad: the zip-lock, over the time (apparently, because I checked it initially) developed a small hole.

Upon further inspection, laptop bag side compartment is covered w Carolina Reaper dust. I realized only now, because I don't use that side-pocket much.

[Bad#2: I still didn't find my fecking earphones]

Edit: I seem to have rubbed Carolina Reaper powder in my nose, pls send help.

 

[Tripod]

The wife's grandmother passed peacefully ay 4:07 am this morning thus ending a real crappy 5 months. August we both got covid. Sept my mom's oxygen level started deteriorating and her Nan was diagnosed with breast cancer. Oct was many trips to Dr's to try and see what was going on. Nov my mom admitted to hospital and passes on 27th. Dec her Nan admitted to hospital and passes Dec 28th. f***ing stressful time. Wife has not worked since mid Nov given she is an OR nurse and certainly isn't in the headspace to be doing operations.

And looking forward, she still has 3 grandparents all in their 90's alive and my grandfather is 88. Can we get a little break here to recoup a bit?

Appreciate you all for letting me share and for sending well wishes and DM's. Hopefully I won't have to post anymore of these types in awhile. Rather post about the trash Flyers.

 

[ellja3]

The wife's grandmother passed peacefully ay 4:07 am this morning thus ending a real crappy 5 months. August we both got covid. Sept my mom's oxygen level started deteriorating and her Nan was diagnosed with breast cancer. Oct was many trips to Dr's to try and see what was going on. Nov my mom admitted to hospital and passes on 27th. Dec her Nan admitted to hospital and passes Dec 28th. f***ing stressful time. Wife has not worked since mid Nov given she is an OR nurse and certainly isn't in the headspace to be doing operations.

And looking forward, she still has 3 grandparents all in their 90's alive and my grandfather is 88. Can we get a little break here to recoup a bit?

Appreciate you all for letting me share and for sending well wishes and DM's. Hopefully I won't have to post anymore of these types in awhile. Rather post about the trash Flyers.

Post whenever you feel like, we are all here for you! Guys here can correct me if I am wrong, but this is safe-space for such stuff.

And, as sad as the entire fact is, I am glad your grandma passed peacefully. Not all people experience it this way. Sending virtual trans-Atlantic hugs. And also, hoping you have passed the black stripe of our zebra-like lives and soon will be on the bright one. It sounds rather cliche-ic, but my own experience in this fecking year has been like that.

 

[Jack Straw]

Was playing Trivial Pursuit when it first came out and one of the answers was blatantly wrong. Can't remember the question, but it was in the Sports category and I knew the answer cold. Problem was, there was no one I could call, complain to, or reason with except a flimsy card. So I shot the first person who smirked. I miss grandma sometimes.

Hell of a car ride home tonight.

(The Child has been telling us of a reading app on her iPad at school)

Child: Daddy, pretend you don't know that I'm on level 3.
Me: Wow, you aren't on level 3?
Child: Mommy, pretend you and everyone knows I'm on Level 3!
Beefette: Wow, you don't know she's on level 3? Foolish.
Child: (cackles) Yes keep fighting! Fight more!
Me: oh my god she's trying to turn us on each other, she's dividing and conquering.
Child: Yes! (more cackling)

----Later, after a period of silence----

Child: How do babies get out of the mommies?
Me, Muttering: Holy f***ing shit.
Beefette: You're too young. I'll tell you when you're ten.
Child: Not ten! I need to know now! I'm all out of waiting! I don't wanna be a kid anymore!
Beefette: (pause to think)
Beefette: Ok, there are two ways. One way is that the doctor cuts open the belly and takes the baby out. The other way is that it comes out of your "bottom."
Child: (processes)
Child: (Sobs) I don't wanna have any more birthdays! I wanna stay five forever! I'm scared!
Beefette: Well. This reminds me that I meant to ask her pediatrician about therapy for her adult-level anxiety.



My need to drink went from 0-100 the second she asked that.

Something tells me that the Child would really take to the game “Risk”.

 

[Chinatown88]

Hell of a car ride home tonight.

(The Child has been telling us of a reading app on her iPad at school)

Child: Daddy, pretend you don't know that I'm on level 3.
Me: Wow, you aren't on level 3?
Child: Mommy, pretend you and everyone knows I'm on Level 3!
Beefette: Wow, you don't know she's on level 3? Foolish.
Child: (cackles) Yes keep fighting! Fight more!
Me: oh my god she's trying to turn us on each other, she's dividing and conquering.
Child: Yes! (more cackling)

----Later, after a period of silence----

Child: How do babies get out of the mommies?
Me, Muttering: Holy f***ing shit.
Beefette: You're too young. I'll tell you when you're ten.
Child: Not ten! I need to know now! I'm all out of waiting! I don't wanna be a kid anymore!
Beefette: (pause to think)
Beefette: Ok, there are two ways. One way is that the doctor cuts open the belly and takes the baby out. The other way is that it comes out of your "bottom."
Child: (processes)
Child: (Sobs) I don't wanna have any more birthdays! I wanna stay five forever! I'm scared!
Beefette: Well. This reminds me that I meant to ask her pediatrician about therapy for her adult-level anxiety.



My need to drink went from 0-100 the second she asked that.

I can't wait until she wants to be a Flyers fan.